Light miscellany quotes and quips from The Choteau Acantha
A columnist describes humorous musings and paradoxes on wealth, health, fashion, etiquette, and social trends. The piece features witticisms about philosophy in the dentist chair, seedless tomatoes, odorless onions, kissing, travel, and modest dress ideals. It cites a shah of Persia’s kitchen utensils and a New Yorker’s poverty threshold while poking fun at public health advice and cultural norms.
Cincinnati Woman Teacher Leads Fair Baseball Umpire School
A Cincinnati vacation school highlights a woman teacher who umpires baseball games fairly to keep crowds calm. The rant also notes mosquitoes and airily discusses gender numbers, claiming female mosquitoes prey on humans and suggesting females may outnumber males by a vast margin.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Cincinnati
Newport girl wins fame wearing automobile veil
A Newport girl draws attention by floating an automobile veil five feet in the breeze, a feat credited to her stylish choice rather than traditional routes to fame. Her eyes catch onlookers as the light fabric dances, signaling a playful, eye catching moment in local society.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Newport
Biblical Fashion Hint Ties To Sodom And Gomorrah
An investigator claims hobble skirts were worn in early biblical days and suggests that fashion choices contributed to the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, framing a moral warning in period style.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Sodom
Gomorrah
Vacationer Finds Old Time Pleasure Before Hotels
A tale recalls a man who enjoyed a serene vacation in ancient days before summer hotels changed travel, highlighting simple pleasures and slower travel experiences.
Walters Strike Members Seek Reemployment After Walkout
Several weeks after organizing a strike the New York Walters have applied to their former employers for work. They report finding a tipless world and a cheerless one since the stoppage.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York Walters
Farming Ahead Says Blackberries May Lack Seeds
A futurist note envisions advanced agriculture producing seedless blackberries with less than 24 percent seeds, suggesting a future for tastier, easier fruit. The idea hints at innovations in crop breeding and food science.
Witty Quip on Marriage and Wedlock from a Woman Novelist
A quoted remark credits a clever woman with staying out of matrimony while implying a man would need extreme genius to avoid wedlock. The line reflects gendered social humor and literary tone.
China Demands Freedom to Spend Borrowed Money
A brief voice argues that if China borrows funds she must spend them as she chooses. The position says lenders can refrain if they disagree. The note frames the stance as reasonable.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
China
Court rules cyclist stepping off back gains no damages
A court declares that a woman who steps off a street car backward cannot claim damages. The judge who wrote the decision is married to a slim and observant wife.
Charade of Eagles Training Story in France Debunked
An exchange claims France trains eagles to attack planes. The speaker mocks the tale, suggesting the storyteller has the bearing of a seasoned fisherman and implying the report is dubious.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
France
Conspiracy to Oust Hobble Shifts Tactics to Pannier Plan
The write up notes a failed attempt to remove the hobble through pannier use and reports a new tactic of placing plats in the hobble. It suggests a drive to compel women to adopt mora cloth through various schemes.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Platts
Fund drive for New York teacher fails
An effort to raise a large sum for the New York teacher who achieved salary equalization in the schools failed lamentably. Post facto gratitude is described as a rare trait in modern science.
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New York
Penitent Son Returns Home After Long Absence
Bert Zabriskie, once wanderer from Montville, returns to his family after years abroad driven by a roving fever. His father’s will held his share in trust until the younger daughter’s twenty fourth birthday, sparing his claim if he returned. Reunited with wife, daughters, and new grandchild, Bert resumes life in New Jersey countryside amid village welcome and legal settlement.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Ontville
N. J
Bert Zabriskie
Rockies
Boonton
Rockaway
Montville
George Washington
New Jersey
Morristown Heights
Rockaway River
Zabriskie
Zabriskies
Albert James Zabriskie
Rover
Jersey
Jersey City
Bert
Nelson S. Kitchell
Crape
Cora van Duyne
Elizabeth Ball
Court of Chancery
Morris County
Far West
Rome
Father Zabriskie
Two Slow with His Wooing
Michael died and Mary his widow receives a grand wake. Shaun O Grady, a bachelor with money, proposes to share the funeral car and their future, hoping to merge bank accounts. Mary declines, saying she promised Johnnie Flynn in the graveyard to be his widow’s son.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Michael
Mary
Shaun O'Grady
Shaun
Faith
Father Brady
Johnnie Flynn
Chicago Tribune
Badly Frightened Fish Strikes Carlisle Angler
Rankin Dunfre of Carlisle reports an unusual event while crossing a bridge at night. A 16 inch fish leaped into weeds when his lantern startled it, leaving the angler amused by the dramatic splash.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Rankin Dunfre
Carlisle
Cling to Blacks and Whites at Ascot Fashion
A London Madame report notes a white lace Ascot dress in tunic style with broad black ninon hems and a short black ninon sack coat. The outfit features black ribbon ruching, a white picot edge, a black hat with white lining, and a forest of black and white ostrich feathers. A parasol trimmed with black chiffon completes the look.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Paris Fashion Puzzles with Striped Coat and Beige Jacket
A Paris correspondent notes odd new tailor-made garments that mix Early Victorian dressing with bold zebra stripes. The article mocks a stone colored cloth coat paired with black and stone striped barding, creating a beige jacket silhouette with a stark striped basketlike skirt.
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Paris
New Stocking Device for Preventing Runs
Instructions propose a technical stocking aid for persistent runs in women’s hose. Replace steel hook ends with quarter inch satin ribbons sewn to the elastic and tied through silk braid loops. Ribbons form decorative bows while stopping holes from hooks.
Picturesque Tunic Frocks Rise In Summer Fashion
The text notes a shift from spring taffetas to softer summer fabrics. Tunic frocks gain popularity as simpler silhouettes replace pannier components, with silk linen and chiffon drapery. Mousseline de soie and lace appear in Paris styles pairing with tunics.
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Mousseline de Sole
Paris
Maline Hats and Tunics Fashion Note
Maline in vogue features hats made with fine wire and sheer tunics. The most summery chapeaur uses profuse flower trim or single blossoms for delicate decoration.
Also Mentioned on This Page
A. B. Guthrie
Choteau, Teton Co
Mont
California
Maryland
Prof. Metchnikoff
Persia
Cleveland
Montville, N. J
Bert Zabriskip
Underwood & Underwood, N
O’grady
Maline
Vogue