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Newspaper
Choteau Acantha
Location
Choteau, Montana, United States of America
Date
May 23, 1912
Page
3
Dr J H Rindlaub a Fargo specialist in eye ear nose and throat appears in a brief note with a quotation on forgiveness suggesting average behavior toward enemies.
The ad promotes Allen's Foot-Fase antiseptic powder to shake into shoes for tired tender feet. It claims to ease pain and make walking delightful. Sold everywhere for 25 cents. Trial package available by mailing to Allen 8 Olmsted Le Roy New York.
The joke from the Boston Evening Transcript plays on a student’s blunt reply to a math problem about fifty five cents per dozen eggs. The setup features a teacher and a pupil in a classroom exchange.
A young matron at the Waldorf Astoria Lenten musicale recounts Marie Tempest joking about her nose. She quotes Tempest saying the Creator chose the first nose that turned up for her, illustrating self deprecating humor about her appearance.
Dialogue notes a witty exchange about leap year proposals among widows and Mrs Twicewed claiming they need no special luck to propose. The tone is light and period informal.
A New York hotel man recounts nervousness vomiting and sleeplessness after coffee and credits Postum with improving health. He notes a woman who quit coffee and gained weight and loss of heart palpitations and advises others to switch. A young lady confirms her own improved appearance after stopping coffee and adopting Postum.
New York reporters report that several thousand confiscated weapons were dumped into the ocean off Sandy Hook by city police under the Sullivan law. The haul included 1,500 revolvers valued at about 11000, over 100 rifles worth around 3000, a historic sword, cane swords, cutlasses, and a mix of possession items, all tagged with source details for court records.
Wisconsin fishermen pack 125 live snapping turtles weighing 1,229 pounds for Philadelphia markets to rival Baltimore terrapin. W. T. Allen ships them in winter from a Mississippi slough where turtles hibernate in mud, then sells when prices rise to about eighteen cents per pound.
James W. Ponder was arrested after a divorce decree led him to enforce his own plan for equal property division. He split furnishings, livestock, and hay, and even attempted to divide the house by sawing through the roof before police intervened.
Police arrested 84 year old Jerry McLean described as the oldest con man in the world after he solicited crime victims with a traveling companion ad offering $25 a week in California. Victims Darrington Evans Joseph Willett Frank Widsher and EB Far each posted small “guarantees” before McLean confessed and recounted a wartime escape tale.
A theater audience panics and a large man in the front row shouts for order. When he heads to the exit to prove safety he flees, leaving everyone laughing at the irony and the line I never could have got out of there if I hadn't stopped that panic.
A fragmentary dialogue on poems about Washington and the Bryant poem. The exchange hints at censorship and payment for the poetry excerpt, with a casual, shop-floor tone and the idea of covering costs from someone’s pocket.
Ruffon Wratz complains of sleeplessness due to cold feet while in a box car. Saymold Storey retorts that the cold objects were frosted turnips being thawed.
A newly elected representative criticized the reporting of his remarks noting added laughter and applause. He pointed to numerous gestures as an element the audience recalls.
Tom tells Dick he expects to inherit fine property and hears that deeds speak louder than words. The playful line contrasts expectations with a pun on deeds.
A brief exchange about a maritime voyage reveals a jokey admission that a wife accompanied the speaker on a very unpleasant trip. The sea captain confirms the trip was notably difficult.
A reported car fire prompted alarm but authorities clarified no blaze occurred. Witnesses overheard chatter described as a false alarm, with no injuries or property damage reported.
In Australia the telephone is seen by some as an amusement yet central reports show busy lines, challenging that view. The exchange highlights the tension between perceived whimsy and essential communication needs.
A discussion on theatrical realism features a claim that audiences resist romantic plots between real-life couples. Critics debate whether stage chemistry between spouses reads as natural or contrived in performance.
A social note confirms Miss Upperton is not engaged to Count Nocash. Marie presents the ring and a photograph to the gentlemen, clarifying the false rumor.
A humorous observation frames Jane as a performer torn between stages. The quip notes she feels both too fat to be an actress and not fat enough to be a prima donna, capturing a lighthearted vanity in theater crowds.
Dialogue notes confusion over Jones career path. One speaker says he has become an actor while denying it, clarifying he merely went on the stage. The exchange highlights misinterpretation of Jones status as performer.
A witty remark contrasts political rights with marriage, claiming women hold sway in matrimony without needing the ballot. The line prompts readers to weigh gender roles and civic rights in a lighthearted exchange.
A reader questions if open fires surpass radiators and replies that the open fire is a grate relief. The exchange highlights preference for traditional hearths over modern heating in casual dialogue.
A playful exchange between Little Willie and a Casual Visitor centers on pie preferences. Willie questions the guest about liking lemon pie as the family plans dessert, anxious about a second helping. The dialogue captures domestic cafe style chatter and keeps a light, intimate tone.
An implied wedding or proposal scene shows George and Evelyn amid a disrupted toast. Evelyn interrupts as a hastily proposed union is mentioned, suggesting a tense moment between the two.
A humorous exchange notes Worthington aging rapidly with gray hair. The dialogue contrasts looks with spirit, as one speaker says a rosy cheeked girl is a healthy young animal and the other agrees. The item reads as a clipped quip from a social page.
An unseen shot mortally wounds a hero, yet ten seconds later he rises to bow and thank the applauding audience. The shocked crowd witnesses a miracle as the man smiles and defies the pulmotor.
Silas Hayrick declares plans to send Reuben to Congress. He notes that Reuben repeatedly gets released on habeas corpus writs whenever he is imprisoned or moved elsewhere.
The inquiry grew beyond simple questioning and neared a hundred people involved, with the investigation moving past the third degree when the speaker left the scene.
A light quip features an organist speeding the wedding march to a two-step pace, prompting the bride and groom to nearly dance up the aisle as a humorous take on marriage.
A quip explains why a wife's allowance is called pin money. The joke notes that men think money for pins suffices to mend old clothes, reflecting gender norms in domestic finance.
A witty exchange lists military ranks from majors to colonels with a joke about admiral status. The banter jokes that proximity to water leads to promotion, reflecting light political humor about state officials and naval titles.
A short rhyme about a resident’s character circulates among neighbors. The couplet hints at a light heart and a taunting remark about the person’s head, prompting local chatter and speculation about the author’s intent.
A brief quirky note mentions Mrs Bings and Mrs Jinks discussing a minor dispute involving a son with a motorized vehicle and a lingering grudge in the city.
A courtroom exchange questions the motive of prosecuting a man accused of robbery. The defense asks why the case should railroad him to prison while the offense involves a railroad context and a train robbery. The tense dialogue underscores competing views on justice and punishment.
A Washington House Committee report highlights Canada's three year homestead, lenient rules, and good land. Settlers from Minnesota and others praise Southern Alberta with adequate moisture, soil, water and climate. Canadian agents offer literature, certificates, and daily excursions to promote settlement.
G Baumel of Chicago credits Cuticura Soap and Ointment with curing three years of facial acne. He describes severe itching and disfigurement, tried pills with no success, then followed directions after reading a Cuticura booklet. After using the soap for washing and ointment morning and night, he says a few weeks of treatment led to a complete cure. A free sample offer via Cuticura Dept. L, Boston.
A humorous exchange features a husband asking his wife to sew on a button before he leaves. The new wife quips that the cook might handle it, noting they married on a typewriter not a sewing machine.
A short aphorism notes that statements of relief at an elder’s death often reflect relief from hardship rather than celebration. The line implies mixed feelings and cautions against assuming universal goodness in death.
IO JU are vowels that have caused many and man's downfall in a cryptic note. This fragment discusses sound patterns and a perceived decline connected to letters and speech. However, the readable text provides no clear event or identifiable entities to anchor a broader news item.
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