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Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Sep 05, 1912
Page
3
A short wry saying notes the difficulty of undoing a marriage or relationship once formed, suggesting that capturing a spouse is easier than reversing the bond. The line reflects traditional gendered humor about marriage dynamics.
An old advertisement touts Croes Ball Blue as a blue medicine that relieves pains instantly. It markets carbolinas and a 2½ to 50 cent size and implies many people prioritize social obligations over debts.
Washington Post notes a small government brochure on fattening calves targets women readers. The alert urges haste as copies may soon run out. Includes call to action for readers to obtain the pamphlet.
Geneva hosted the International Congress on Aerial Legislation as it drafts a code of laws. A proposed clause states that a birth aboard an air craft must be logged by the pilot and reported to authorities at the first landing location.
A noted anecdote from England shows Rudyard Kipling entertaining Dorothy Drew, Gladstone’s granddaughter, in Hawarden. Mrs Drew feared the author’s fatigue but Dorothy quips that Kipling has been tiring her, sparking lighthearted amusement.
Oscar Wilde complained America had no antiquities or curiosities during his lecturing tour. An American girl retorted that the nation would soon have both as they import antiquities and curiosities already, implying cultural growth ahead.
San Francisco expert R Marriott Thompson warns against overdoing scientific management. The New York Tribune recalls Hussler, who cut motions from 800 to 17 in a factory then disrupted a wedding by pushing a bishop and canon aside at the altar, declaring a single job enough.
Natica questions Evelyn about marrying Reggy and fears risking his future. Evelyn affirms, arguing his potential justifies the gamble.
A dialogue unfolds about attending a large convention with plans to bring a wife and friends. One man notes he has no pull to secure entries, while the other offers a courteous invitation and a small gesture.
A humorous exchange centers on a wife wishing to stay home for the summer while her husband insists on going to Chigger farm. He jokes that old clothes are the theme and proposes packing seven trunks of the oldest garments in the state.
A dialogue reveals a planned Yellowstone Park trip. The husband says all arrangements were made, but his wife has decided to join, initially worried it would be too hard a journey.
Lulu recalls engagement with a man who was foolish and attempted a renewal last winter. Anna confirms the pair were once engaged and notes the man could be engaged again this summer if not for his prior behavior.
A reflective note on the city clocks sounding together as the populace remains unmoved, echoing a rare moment of collective stillness amid routine timekeeping.
A lighthearted exchange shows a man proposing to wed the neighbor's daughter to obtain a runabout. The woman asks how, and he suggests marriage as the solution, reflecting a humorous, everyday dialogue.
A short Browning's Magazine quotation about trust and fidelity suggests that even the most reliable employees can be compelled to leave. The speaker contrasts Holder's longevity and perceived reliability with the idea that the trusted ones often depart, possibly to Canada, reflecting themes of loyalty and opportunistic migration.
Deliberate avoidance of harmony cited by Senator Sorghum as he questions why the convention lacked unity. He says fear of being deemed capable of forming so called gentlemen's agreements fuels the reluctance amid public suspicion.
The New Jersey legislature authorized appointing three mosquito control experts in each of the 21 counties to combat mosquitoes. The speech notes it is unlikely these experts have discarded their window screens or doors, implying ongoing concerns about vector control.
A buyer boasts of inspecting a lot in Binglehurst while another operator reveals the property remains submerged. The exchange captures a humorous misperception over a site rumored to be ready for development.
Willie Was Jonah is described as a high priced lawyer while the father questions his suitability. The whale could not retain him, suggesting a metaphorical or humorous critique within the dialogue.
A fragment hints at a rescue plot with lines about Miss Flirtgirl in danger and three rescuers Jack Tom and T. The text suggests a beach incident and a potential stranger involvement.
A frugal husband suggests a reception using rented plants dishes and palms to save money while rejecting the idea of renting sandwiches and ice cream. The exchange highlights a cost conscious approach to hosting.
Bunkerton loses his temper after a detour and impassable highway strand him. He shouts at a bystander who can only joke that the road resembles Mose Whibley’s drought stream. The countryman notes this is no turnpike but a rough hideaway.
A brief local note says the doctor remains unfazed by hot weather as in past years while another unnamed figure faces a family loss adding a somber note to the scene.
A town resident described as a quiet man whose children are bright and well behaved. The poem notes he never repeats himself and that others seldom meet his equal.
A brief dialogue shares a father reflecting on his three children, two daughters and a college son, and his struggle to earn their pride. He feels pride in them yet doubts he can make them proud of him.
A department store scene has a husband claiming his wife broke a rib at the bargain counter. The polite floorwalker quips that they will reset it in the surgical department and jokes about summer rates for more operations including an appendix removal for 19.99.
A man urges others to notice a woman in a pink gown across the lawn. He claims she is not remarkable, then asserts she is not afraid of having cancer, promising a story about her. The exchange hints at a bold or controversial perception of illness.
The dialogue notes that normal lungs hold about 27.3 percent more air than compressed lungs. Jill observes women may use more lung capacity than men, prompting commentary on breathing and corset effects.
Quotation discusses poetry in daily life found in streetcars billboards soap wrappers and breakfast foods highlighting art in ordinary public scenes. The dialogue contrasts abstract poetry with visible examples from urban life.
A fragment hints at a quotation about death and the doctor, suggesting a tension between harsh fate and medical ease. The readable text reads Death loves a shin ing mark and He The doctor loves an easy mark, conveying a sharp, cryptic note.
The grouch snarls at the cooling breeze and scoffs that the pleasant spell cannot last. A sneering air marks the day as he mutters under his breath about the fleeting fair weather.
A brief dialogue features a jokey remark about soft water versus a hard drinker. A woman declares the hobble skirt must go, described as a large woman weighing about 200 pounds.
A father urges his son to strive in his chosen path and notes that effort pays. He adds that even a humble woodchopper could find a Vaudeville moment, illustrating a belief in perseverance and comic advancement.
A sermon style summary of Jesus sending the twelve with instructions. It covers his motive to heal and teach, the selection and grouping of apostles, restrictions to Jews first, proclamation of the kingdom, dependence on the Father, and the call to compassionate, dignified service through medical and social ministry in God’s name.
The Grouch notes a dispirited gathering in a grove near Torpidville with a noisy band, a wrinkled necked statesman, a wobbly merry go round, and a pavilion hawker. Attendees include old soldiers, farmers, and voters all grumbling, as the piece calls the event a mixed reunion rally or picnic.
A Terre Haute reader describes her four year old nephew’s face breaking out with red spots and blisters. After trying medicine with no relief she used Cuticura Soap and Ointment, washing with warm suds and applying the ointment. Within a week and a half the boy recovered without scarring. Signed Mrs. Arthur Haworth, Jan 10 1912. Cuticura advertised with free samples and Skin Book offer from Cuticura Dept. L Boston.
John Burroughs and his brother Eden chase a Fox in the Catskills at Hobart. Eden shoots the fox and earns five dollars for the skin. John later reveals he wrote the account and received seventy five dollars from the magazine that published it.
A light exchange shows a doctor’s wife calling her husband Duckie and joking about him being a quack. The playful banter highlights a domestic moment in a local society scene.
A fragmentary paragraph ponders whether telephone operation is a profession or merely a calling. The text also briefly nods to a household product and offers brief, general musings on aging and knowledge.
A Sewickley man discusses a plan to exchange children for a couple of years with German and English families. Skeptics question the idea but some see language and cultural learning benefits. One Wilkinsburg resident mentions a neighbor's interest in exchanging with a family in Siberia.
Quotation captures a line where a speaker admits fooling themselves more than others. The exchange centers on parental authority and self deception in a rustic vernacular voice. The remark reflects themes of pride and familial dynamics.
A Kansas City woman visits her husband’s relatives in a small Kansas town with two young daughters. On an errand to the depot the children behave well, but return chewing gum. They had found gum on a slot machine, and the older girl explains they asked the agent for pennies.
A local philanthropist ordered a personal fan and a buzzer for convenience. He removed the door key to allow air from the adjoining room through the keyhole where eight aspiring clerks work.
A proud individual proclaims he is self-made. A listener notes the head is too large for the thinking part. The exchange ends with a sharp jab about matching intellect to ego.
A witty quip about a perfect husband prompts Paxton Toilet Co of Boston to offer free trial boxes of Paxtine Antiseptic, a germicidal toilet preparation, to any woman upon request. The note adds a jab about how women flock to even an unattractive man.
An advertisement touts Cole a Carbolisalve as stopping itching and pain and curing piles with 25 and 50 cent sizes. Also promoted are Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup for teething at 25 cents and a moral quip about discretion versus cowardice.
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