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This newspaper page contains 14 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Jun 08, 1911
Page
2
Across the column humorous notices touch on turkey purchases of typewriters and Panama hat prices, a Chicago taxicab bankruptcy, a New York janitor baronet, and a bathtub death in Chicago. It blends quips on summer forecasts, college anniversaries, and oddball anecdotes with light sarcasm and local color.
A reader suggests exchanging postage stamps for governor seeds, noting seeds cost money. The column muses on American energy from good food and strong eggs and butter. Wu Ting Fang’s return to the United States is hinted, and an Illinois judge’s injunction on nightly praying is mentioned alongside a mule motif about stubbornness.
A humorous note on the low percentage of co-eds declaring desires and the crowding fear for Westminster Abbey. The piece suggests an overflow meeting to accommodate peers and Americans willing to pay for admission. A Harvard professor reportedly claims women are more primitive and meant for child bearing, a remark framed as provocative satire.
A former Princeton football player died recently from blastomycetes, marking the nineteenth recorded case in medical history. The report notes surprise at the disease’s rarity and questions why its name has not gained popularity sooner.
In Washington Italian envoy Count di Rosini hosts Miss Isabel Thorne amid a Latin alliance scare. Detective Grim investigates a shooting at the embassy ball scene while Miss Thorne vanishes, sparking a chase through diplomatic circles and a web of secrets.
A fragment describes Mr Campbell's bland face altered by thin apidery lines of perplexity, hinting at a scene of quiet tension around a count. The sparse text preserves a moment of introspection and subtle unease in a formal setting.
Abram Reese testifies in a rural case over a cow’s ownership. He confirms a buggy was traded for the cow between Hibbs and Simmons and that no trade reversal occurred, noting both families remain in Hawkensville.
A letter from Miss Lu Johnson of 1523 Ninth St Washington DC praises Cuticura Pills Ointment and Soap after rapid relief from a knee to waist eruption with constant itching and burning. She details a swift eight day healing and urges others to try the remedies. The note notes distribution by Potter Drug & Chem Corp Boston.
A vintage satirical ad fragment features lines about lobsters and a talking duo Foolish Fred and Pert Polly. It promotes a playful tone with quips on health remedies like Garfield Tea and general life wisdom.
Hezekiah begins reform by cleansing the temple and renewing covenant with Jehovah. He gathers leaders, purifies priests, and prepares a broad national revival extending from Beer-sheba to Dan. The Passover is celebrated with purified priests, removal of idols, and renewed worship, ending with Hezekiah prospering in all he did.
An ad style passage promotes Dr. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets as the thorough cure for constipation and a favored family laxative. It mocks a fake exchange about fees with quips from a Wise Guy and Simple Mug.
A shoe clerk notes that while small issues disrupt daily life, larger problems stem from powerful owners who try to fit big issues into small solutions. The dialogue satirizes how minor appearances mask greater control.
Promote Allen's Foot-Ease antiseptic powder to shake into shoes for relief from corns bunions ingrown nails swollen sweating feet blisters and callous spots. Sold everywhere 25c. No substitutes. Address Allen S Olmsted Le Roy New York.
In Garry, Pat leads his lean blind lame brown mare to water and harness. A crowd of sports jeers ask how much the animal can draw, and Pat replies the mare draws the attention of every fool in town. The remark is noted in The Housekeeper.
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