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This newspaper page contains 11 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Titonka Topic
Location
Titonka, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Dec 04, 1919
Page
8
A portly Dutch woman tries to send a money order to her son in China. The clerk jokes about an automobile noise honk honk and the order is made payable to Bongkong. A homely joke ends the brief item on rent and family costs.
In San Francisco an after dinner address by Harold Bell Wright argues financial success proves a book’s merit. He cites Robinson Crusoe and other works as examples of profitability and notes praise follows profit in the literary world.
A typist mocks a young woman by offering a dictionary as a gift. She retorts with a sharp insult, prompting a brief exchange. The editor notes the quip as a wry comment on love and experience.
The report lists Gordon Clark selling geese for 136.84 and Rev. A. Kiser husking 102 bushels of corn in a day in Malvern. It notes architectural work contracted to Byrd Moore of Des Moines, a two month two and a half month lamb shipment from J. McPherrin farm near Glenwood, and market top price at 14.85. It covers highway commission views on truck tours, Tri-county fairgrounds planning in Perry, and large drainage district assessments totaling 177 546.16. Woods Brothers in Lincoln Neb and other county landowners begin ditch and dike projects over 100 000. It cites farm land price increases of about 60 percent in seventy counties and a new auto registration law effective November 1. Corn husking advances amid wind damage. Fred Smith reports 110 acres with yields 40 to 45 bushels. Beet sugar plants expand Iowa capacity with new Belmond and Waverly factories. A Cass county sale of 24 000 dollars worth of thoroughbred Angus cattle sees an average of 550 per animal, top price 3150 for Blue Ribbon Blackcap sold to Baird and Stone.
Advertisement promotes Bayer as the genuine aspirin brand with Bayer Tablets of Aspirin in proper packaging and directions for cold pain headache neuralgia lumbago and rheumatism. It notes Bayer means genuine aspirin and that physicians prescribe it, selling handy tins of 12 tablets for a few cents.
An advertisement touts Danderine claiming to stop hair loss and dandruff after few applications, with a claim of growing long thick strong hair. A brief humorous exchange follows, highlighting a suit remark about something talking.
Thousands of women with kidney and bladder issues are urged to seek Swamp-Root, a physician’s prescription. The ad claims kidney health affects other organs, listing back pain headaches and nervousness as signs, and offers a sample via mail order.
Short joke explaining long division as dividing so the other person gets the short end. The line frames a humorous take on math and fairness.
A vintage advertisement touts Green's August Flower as a universal household remedy for constipation, indigestion, nervous dyspepsia, liver trouble, and related symptoms, claiming it has aided people for over 50 years. The copy urges readers to ask their druggist and notes it is sold in civilized countries. It closes with a quote about friendship and success from Edward Everett Hale.
An advertisement touts Pape's Gold Compound as a fast cure for colds and grippe, claiming relief within hours. It promises nostril relief, stopped runny nose, headache relief, and feverish symptoms after two to three doses, at low cost.
An old advertisement touts Gold Medal Haarlem Oil Capsules as a universal remedy to defy aging by cleansing kidneys and digestive organs. It claims renewed kidney action, toxin removal, and prevention of age-related decline, urging readers to buy from druggists with a money back promise.
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