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This newspaper page contains 12 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Shafter Press
Location
Shafter, California, United States of America
Date
Aug 12, 1947
Page
11
In a Southern farming town Eliza Higgins defies praise from a county agent praising her crops. She notes the potato crop is excellent yet questions where the bad ones for hogs are, embodying a satirical grumble about farming praise.
A wife makes a surprise call to her husband's workplace and, meeting his secretary, she introduces herself as the wife and remarks how little her husband has shared about Miss Shapely, the secretary.
Mrs Crimpin tests a new housekeeper Laura and reveals a grim instruction. Any bad news for a boarder must be saved and given just before meals, a policy the operator insists is the most important detail. The exchange highlights rigid, troubling expectations in the boarding house.
A playful exchange imagines Adam and Eve naming animals. Eve jokes that the hippo resembles a hippopotamus, suggesting the creature’s name fits its appearance better than prior labels. The quip ends with Adam considering the humorous reasoning.
A drenched Sandy, saved from a watery grave by a local boatman, stands on the riverbank. He offers a two shilling piece as payment, but the boatman signals to swim again to settle the debt.
A timid husband is sent to buy drip grind coffee but returns with leak grind after mishearing his wife. He reports that the shop said no drip grind exists and asks what she told him. The wife confirms she asked for drip grind, but the husband repeats the mistaken term.
A famed artist Whistler asks a celebrated subject for his view on a portrait. The sitter declines calling it a bad work of art. Whistler retorts you are a bad work of nature, seen through his monocle in a sharp exchange.
Crocheted rug pattern offers a 20 by 3 inch or larger size option with durable fabric. Petters 7146 provides improved pattern visuals with charts photos and complete directions making needlework easier. Pattern price is 20 cents and orders go to the given address.
Smithers prepares for a solo mountain trip when guide Jake asks for a compass then suggests carrying a deck of playing cards to stay calm. He jokes a game of solitaire could lure a guiding stranger to reveal direction, a quirky piece of advice from the old camp veteran.
A reader submits a jumble of trivia questions and answers covering topics from currency in China to Roman applause and telegraph history. Answers include the lowest Chinese bill value, Roman applause style, women named trains, first corner boxes, U S depressions count, tide behavior, Hattie Caraway election year, largest anchor harbor, shelldrake versus mandrake, and the first telegraph line year.
A list of five items mentions a five hundred dollar bill valued at four cents, a gesture-based performance with snapping fingers and togas, two entities named Ann Rutledge and Pocahontas, a Paris reference dated 1560, and the number twenty six.
Collier's notes that the letter E appears far more often in several languages than in English. In texts of 1000 words, E occurs 591 times in English, 878 in Spanish, 850 in French, and 988 in German.
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