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This newspaper page contains 16 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Orono Weekly Times
Location
Orono, Ontario, Canada
Date
May 08, 1947
Page
2
A series of short, old time comic sketches place a blunt schoolmaster testing a student on Magna Carta dates and Gordon Riots then pivot to a loud baby, a wry mother, and flirty youths. Witty exchanges reveal misunderstandings and playful punchlines about love and ambition.
A professor of English keeps a pretty secretary in his study. His wife discovers them together. The wife scolds and the professor replies that they are both surprised. He teases with a pun about being surprised and astonished.
During a mid morning break a teacher asks children about future jobs. Joan bluntly says she wants to be a widow to avoid labels of old maid or a husband’s boss, sparking unexpected classroom humor.
A postman quips to a resident that fear of her dog is not the issue, but his own trousers are frayed by the animal. The exchange captures a humorous domestic moment with a sharp line about canine trouble.
The Ottawa Citizen reports from the United Kingdom Information Office in Ottawa that unsolicited food parcels up to 22 pounds may be sent to individuals in Britain with no duty charged and no coupon point surrendering required. There are no quantity limits beyond the 22 pound maximum.
The piece compares billions in government budgets to a practical counting task, explaining that $1,000,000,000 would require 1,000 tables of $1,000,000 each and 105 years to count at one dollar per second. It contrasts this with a tale of carrying gold pounds and notes governments spending billions with ease.
Paint quality suffers when liquids in a can separate. The text stresses thorough pre use mixing of oil pigment dryer and thinner to reblend into a uniform protective and decorative coating. Quick stirs fail to restore proper consistency.
A collage of quoted lines from various papers critiques postwar finance and social issues. Highlights include calls for sensible housing for veterans, warnings about reparations funding, and sharp quips on safety, politics, and everyday life from multiple Canadian newspapers.
Ottawa Citizen argues that the Soviet Union is not seeking war and is not ready to wage it. It contends Moscow fears US attack more than Washington fears Moscow and criticizes voices warning of a coming conflict as the real accelerants of war.
The Woodstock Sentinel-Review notes that major powers plan prolonged contention over Germany's postwar status, suggesting battles will outlast the wartime struggle to shape its destiny.
A reward of 106 pounds is offered for each golden eagle eyrie from which the young can fly. The scheme, led by the Association of Bird Watchers and Wardens at the invitation of the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds, aims to protect several raptors in the Scottish Highlands and pay holders 3 to 10 pounds for rearing or fledging birds on their lands with compensation for poultry and game losses.
War disruptions left Canadian markets bare of imported blues and Roquefort. Simon Labarge of Chateau Cheese at Borden led development to a cow milk blue cheese using artificial caves and new manufacturing, aided by Danish refugee Andris Kolding. The product, named Blafort, debuted as a blue cheese option.
The Bronx Zoo seeks to rescue platypuses by airlifting 10 000 iced earthworms to feed three Australian born platypuses aboard a ship near the Panina Canal. Earthworms packed in moss and iced to prevent mildew arrive as the animals await a special tank for swim and burrow.
New York City's large apparel store unveils its Fifth Avenue headquarters with distinctive Nile green dresses in one department and matching green leather on bleached wood chairs. The building includes steam coils under sidewalls to address next winter's snow removal challenges.
A fragmentary exchange portrays Joan lamenting her choice of a self made man. She now wishes he had employed an architect, hinting at improved planning or resources she believes were lacking.
A six part drip proof tap has appeared in Britain with a washer that can be changed without shutting off main water. It uses two synthetic washers and water pressure sealing. Lab tests simulate 40 years of use with 1 000 000 on off cycles and show the tap remains as good as new.
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