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Newspaper
Myrtle Point Enterprise
Location
Myrtle Point, Oregon, United States of America
Date
Nov 13, 1913
Page
3
In a brief exchange, Lonnie agrees to play marbles with James, confident he can win each round. The dialogue suggests a casual neighborhood competition between two youths.
The Swift Specifica Company promotes U S S B as a purely vegetable blood purifier. It claims to outperform mineral drugs and cures blood diseases linked to pimples and other conditions. The firm offers free information from its Atlanta office and urges buyers to avoid cheaper substitutes.
A courtroom anecdote recalls Colonel Byrne defending a murder case under full moon light. The alibi collapses when an almanac shows no moon, prompting laughter and the defendant’s acquittal. Byrne pockets $500, $400 of which covers almanac printing costs, prompting a quip about moral sense.
Advertising note promotes Allen’s Foot-ase powder to cure hot sweating aching and swollen feet corns ingrowing nails and bunions. Claims broad relief with sample offer and free mailings from Allen 8 Olmsted Le Roy New York and warns against substitutes.
A poetic young White House correspondent reached into his pocket and presented a small leather bound volume to Secretary Joseph Patrick Tumulty, sparking a lighthearted moment that unsettled reporters outside. Gus Karger urged the man to sing and promised a future salary once finished. Mothers are advised to use Mrs Winslows Soothing Syrup for teething children.
A farmer leads a country tour for a boy named Gladstone. They pass a two year old bull. when asked how to tell its age the farmer says by the horns. Gladstone realizes the joke: two horns equal two years.
A young Newton resident highlights her mother’s rheumatic debility making weekly washday painful to witness. The anecdote appears in the Bud column from the Kansas City Star, alongside brief items on health and a humor gag about a sunlit room and high rent.
A tense exchange unfolds as the wife bitterly denies nagging for funds while the husband insists his purchases come from money acquired elsewhere. The dialogue highlights financial pressure and marital strain amid probing remarks about who funds spending.
The Toronto Globe wonders if Joseph Lister would be remembered among immortals if he had commercialized his wound antiseptic dressing. The provocative reflection questions fame tied to innovation versus profit.
The excerpt presents a dialogue between a Missionary and a Sinner about happiness and living a double life. The sinner contends that he felt split between two existences like two dogs, highlighting inner conflict and moral struggle.
Frank H. Sweet offers practical dog training guidance for country boys. He emphasizes exact obedience, patience, and restraint, noting variability among breeds and individuals. The article covers methods for pointer and setter training, mouth control, fetch, and gradual introduction to game, with cautions about overusing the whip and preserving the dog's spirit.
A discussion of thunder theories explains ancient beliefs of clouds knocking together and early ideas about vacuum air rush. Modern theory cites damp cotton experiments showing electrical discharge vaporizing cloud moisture into steam and causing explosive bursts like gunpowder, producing the crackling sound near observers.
A humorous family exchange frames the mounting expenses of running a household table. The youngest boy quips that he would stop saying grace at meals, reflecting frugal attitudes amid tightening budgets.
Robby tells Judgea he prefers Percy to other callers for his sister because she lets him stay and hear what Percy says. Percy asks why Robby favors him, and Robby answers by noting his continued presence around the pair.
A dinner gathering of firefighters heard a sentiment praising women as a flame that cannot be extinguished and for which there is no insurance, provoking discussion about dangers and gender impressions.
Mrs remarks that one half the people don’t know how the other lives and her husband replies that the fault lies with her. The exchange shows domestic squabble humor with a playful edge.
Letters from Louisville and Romayor praise Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound for relief from weakness and nervous fatigue. Mrs Inize Wie Lis says it made her ten years younger and urges consultation before doctors. Mrs Viola Jasper claims cure of displacement and bladder trouble with the preparation.
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