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Eugene Weekly Guard in Eugene, Oregon

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Articles on This Page

This newspaper page contains 23 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.

Newspaper

Eugene Weekly Guard

Location

Eugene, Oregon, United States of America

Date

Mar 14, 1903

Page

10

Papa, What Would You Take For Me

Poem excerpt by Eugene Field describing a father cradling a sleeping baby girl. The child asks what price would be acceptable for her, and the father answers with a dollar, while reflecting on love, home, and the beauty of land and sea. The scene blends lullaby imagery with emotional depth as the father contemplates the worth of his child.

Eugene Field

Jonas Chooses a Birthday Bride in a Village Plot

In a village scheme three young women plot to marry Jonas Gardner. May Gardner persuades the group to engineer a wife for him, while Uncle John hints at possibilities. Jonas vows to wed Jennie Deering, secretly asking for a wife as a birthday present and sealing a betrothal with Jennie before midnight.

Jock Jennie Jonas Sallie Green May Ellow May Gardner John Gardner Uncle John Jennie Deering

Plan for Ireland land reform backed by British official

Wellman of the Chicago Record-Herald reports Sir Anthony MacDonnell’s assurance that a land question settlement in Ireland will come on terms pleasing both Irish tenants and landlords. The plan favors transfer of land to Irish people, with government aid, possible eminent domain, and a large initial cost to the imperial treasury to reduce congestion and boost productivity.

Alter Wellman Chicago Record-Herald Anthony MacDonnell Ireland India Imperial Treasury Imperial Government

Jonas Receives Birthday Bride Gift Promised by Friend

A New York Daily News note records a promise kept when a man named Jonas is to be given a wife for his birthday. The unusual gift reflects personal humor and social gesture celebrated in the piece.

Jonas New York Daily News

Confidence and Poker Tales Across Racial Stereotypes

A collage of humorous snippets depicts gambling wit and manipulation. A Black gentleman Sam meets a new high-rolling opponent, plotting a four Queens and four Kings bluff while a confidant pushes for an ace as a confidence card. The Indianapolis News vignette mocks cons and class. Judge notes the puzzled Ryefuddle and a punchline.

Sam Samuel Yaas Indianapolis News

World voyage completed in seven months and a half

A picture postcard dispatched from Berlio announces a globe circling journey lasting seven months and a half, documenting the sender’s extensive travels around the world. The card marks the ends of a remarkable expedition and the return of the traveler.

Berlio

Tickled to Death Story In Jumbled Phrase

A Philadelphia Press fragment notes the death of Hard appe, described as happy and “tickled to death” after living on tick for so long. The odd phrasing suggests a humorous or clipped obituary line, with the phrase used to convey contentment in death.

Hardappe Wage Tick Philadelphia Press

Woman Tries to Pay Fare with Five Dollar Bill

A woman on an uptown Third Avenue surface car paid a five dollar bill for a five cent fare and sought change in small coins from the conductor and fellow passenger. She exchanged coins for dollar bills, counted cents, and repeatedly offered more change, prompting amused reactions from riders as the conductor and a stranger tried to resolve the discrepancy.

Third Avenue New York Sun

Yankee thrift tale from a frugal banker tale

A Western Massachusetts banker who died last year embodied thrift. His clerks used envelopes for notes, and he directed his bank to cut newspaper pages to save postage. He even asked for mailings in a single wrapper every four days to keep postage at three cents.

Massachusetts Uncle Sam New York Commercial

The Discomfited Con Man in a Familiar Encounter

In a brief Baltimore American exchange Silas Cornshredder confronts a would be con man claiming recognition and a family tie. The con man insists they share familiarity while Silas questions the claim and presses the unknown relation. The scene plays on mistaken identity and old grievances as the two men spar verbally.

Cousin Henry Silas Cornshredder Han'spike Baltimore American

Slippers Lost in Quip at Philadelphia Press

A lighthearted quip notes a couple arguing over where slippers might be hidden, with a line about nearly every cook in town and the phrase My, but she makes the Lutter Oy, attributed to the Philadelphia Press.

Philadelphia Press

Burrowing Owls Of Florida Build Underground Towns

Florida hosts the burrowing owl Spectyta cunicularia floridana, a wise bird that digs deep burrows for homes. They live in large colonies on open prairie, springing into burrows at the first danger and sleeping four to eight feet underground, forming real bird cities.

Florida

The Overworked Engineer and Sleep Calls on Railroads

A historical piece argues that railroad accidents stem from overwork among engineers and firemen. It cites seven-day work weeks, long shifts, and fatigue as key factors, noting Mogul engines demand more effort and trains run with crews sometimes sleepily at the controls. The article quotes a fireman describing an engineer dozing at thirty miles per hour and being awakened to brake.

Dong A Western Road

Rest and length of railroad workers' shifts

The article examines extreme hours for engineers and firemen, citing twenty hour shifts and the wear on workers. It links fatigue to railroad disasters, notes pressure from companies to work longer for pay, and contrasts passenger versus freight duties. A Western railroad GM advocates ten hours rest thresholds.

Eclipse Order From German Regiment On Sun Show

Before a solar event a German colonel told his sergeant to assemble the regiment for an eclipse, either on parade ground in undress or in the drill shed if cloudy, with the colonel supervising in person. The sergeants issued an official day’s order detailing location and procedure.

Knew the Sea Wife Promise Conversation

A fragment shows a wife saying she learned something she vowed not to tell and a husband urging her to speak. The lines reflect a tone of secrecy and irony typical of a cynical bachelor’s quip about love and trust.

Fisherman captures crafty seal after inland fishing tale

Andy Fitzgerald, a fisherman from vict city, recounted a curious episode off Del Mar where a seal stole his sanddab catches. After luring the seal with a second line, he lured the animal into a boat and used a rope noose to trap it, selling the captive seal to a Georgia visitor for 25 dollars to be transported to a Southern estate lake.

Andy Fitzgerald Del Cincinnati Enquirer Fitzgerald Georgia

Remarkable young preacher in Burlington church circles

Lonnie Lawrence Dennis an eight year old colored boy captivates Burlington churchgoers with biblical talks at the African Methodist Church. Though never formally schooled, he was educated by his mother and has impressed several ministers with his clear, intelligent answers to many scripture questions.

Lonnie Lawrence Dennis Burlington

Western Congressman and the pie knife mystery

A New York Times anecdote places a Washington member of Congress dining in a restaurant. After finishing, the waiter brings pie with a knife and the congressman questions whether Walter suspects his identity. The companion dismisses concern, noting the waiter could not know who he is.

Signa Congress Washington New York Times

Hearse Critique Reflects on Postmortem Display

The Buenos Aires Herald criticizes the hearse as barbaric and absurd, arguing it mirrors a primitive intellect. It laments state funerals with nodding horses and flunky attendants in knee breeches, calling for civilization to curb such bandwagon displays.

Buenos Ayrea Herald

Women at Potters Wheel Pottery as new outlet for female energy

The Brook lyn Eagle notes pottery making as a fresh outlet for women's energy. It highlights the Hockwood works started by a woman and cites many women turning to the wheel to design and shape clay. Classes are forming with eager students nationwide.

The Brooklyn Eagle

Subways Cut Becoming Relief, Skeptic Says

A Brooklyn Eagle excerpt quotes a New Yorker doubting subway relief for surface congestion. The visitor argues the project already eases crowding, while noting the system is not yet running or der, yet many are being killed in it who might otherwise add to the congestion.

New Yorker Brooklyn Eagle

Answered Doorbell Sparks Debate at Home

A Yonkers Statesman excerpt depicts Brid asked to answer the door. Brid confirms she did respond with loud exasperation, prompting maternal questioning. The fragment captures quick domestic interaction and the humor of miscommunication.

Bridget Yonkers Statesman

Also Mentioned on This Page

Jennie Ing John Zish Mr. Ryefuddle N. B Owa
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