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Newspaper
Choteau Acantha
Location
Choteau, Montana, United States of America
Date
Aug 01, 1912
Page
2
A collection of satirical quips and quarries from the Choteau Acantha era poking fun at politics, society, and daily life. It reflects humorous opinions on New York, Philadelphia, and Atlantic City while noting social trends, manners, and peculiar sayings of the time.
The report notes a German aviator has been killed, with comments on wartime airmen casualties and the absence of surplus air crew concerns given ongoing losses in the air war.
A home ice making device is praised as a modern convenience while a sleeping porch offers a cool retreat. A California heiress ends an engagement with a European nobleman, seen as a wiser choice than lingering regrets.
England’s first settlement 305 years ago is contrasted with today’s American fortunes shaping the scene as wealthy settlers arrive. An eastern housewife has found a method to make jam from spinach and hints she could even turn sideburns into shredded wheat.
A Philadelphia man travels to Brazil to film a boa constrictor. Two brothers are reunited after years apart thanks to a tattoo mark. Congress feels dull amid baseball and presidential campaigns. Boston tests a Jointed make car to tame crooked streets. A machine promises five dollars from a three dollar investment, but the inventor is jailed.
The note lists radium, wireless, the telephone, antitoxins and six other modern marvels as wonders. It playfully asks why the Kitchenette is not included among the acclaimed items.
Some Chicago bachelors would like to adopt sons, but object wives. This shows to what depth of desperation the prevailing styles of feminine garb will drive particular men.
A wry remark praises moving to the suburbs to enjoy social pleasures and visits with only the cost of car fare, highlighting a clever social shift toward suburban life.
A Pittsburgh woman reports her dog swallowed a half dollar a rand jeteran and a $400 ring likely after tasting wealth. The owner’s reminder to tag and seek care highlights a curious domestic mishap.
G W Burton comments in the Los Angeles Times on Miss Jennie Crocker, heir to Crocker and Mills wealth, abandoning aristocratic puppy culture to marry. He condemns idle luxury, urges charitable care for destitute children, and warns against fueling socialism and class hatred. He notes Crocker sold her kennel and plans marriage.
The piece notes that tuberculosis claimed the lives of many eminent authors and scholars. It cites Dr. Arthur Jacobson and Dr. John B. Huber suggesting the disease might spur genius. Named figures include Milton Locke Pope Johnson Scott Browning Goethe Stevenson Lanier Emerson Voltaire Ruskin Kingsley Kant Rousseau Dunbar and others.
Citizens note a rising number of energetic individuals described as human dynamos at the ball park, signaling a busy community scene. The dialogue highlights admiration for hard workers and a crowded athletic venue as a social hub.
Mrs. Timothy Clancy returning to her Superior Avenue home found two burglars in the dining room. She calmly climbed through the window and frightened them away, then later helped neighbors recover as the robbers escaped with six diamond rings two gold mesh bags and money totaling 165 dollars plus 500 dollars in loot.
A New York social event saw eight Chinese Pekinese dogs dine with eight American women at the Vanderbilt hotel. Mrs. Arthur L. Helland hosted the sequestered luncheon for Vi-Sin of Alderbourne, with guests from Pekin and notable society figures in attendance. The affair featured a Chinese menu and tailored decor, while the dog companions accompanied their mistresses as guests.
Chicago officials and the Anti-Cruelty Society warn of one million homeless cats in the city. Hugo Krause cites health risks and calls for immediate action to provide homes or exterminate. stray cats cluster in basements and alleys, with evidence of rapid population growth and abandoned litters.
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