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This newspaper page contains 45 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Bristol Phoenix
Location
Bristol, Rhode Island, United States of America
Date
Dec 10, 1907
Page
4
A Chicago Tribune item recalls Little Johnny sent to church for a sermon text. He misheard and said the line was Don’t be afraid you’ll get the quilt. The correct text is Fear not the comforter will come.
A Kansas man and his family bow for grace at supper when the phone rings three times. He answers, returns to the table and again bows his head as the phone rings a second and third time, then says hello.
A boy named Bobby faced a choice between a ten cent piece and a quarter for the church offering. He chose the ten cent piece, deciding it could give greater cheerfullyness, illustrating a moral about cheerful giving.
An Irish immigrant enters a police force physical test, stripping for measurements and drills. He resists parts of the exam and quips that the procedure clashes with his plans for marriage, causing confusion in the room. The scene ends with a humorous misplacement in a different bureau.
In a Scots gathering, Dr Mac Donald declined to sing claiming his voice was unmusical. After urging, he finally performed but drew a painful silence until a fellow guest quipped that his singing was poor yet his veracity was awful.
An old Scottish lady, Mrs Murray Keith, challenged Sir Walter Scott about his authorship of many traditions and anecdotes used in his novels, insisting she knew her own groats among others kail. The exchange showcases Scott's defense of his literary credit.
An old doctoring advertisement touts Pineules as a guaranteed remedy for back pain stiffness rheumatism and kidney trouble with a 30 day treatment price. It promotes Bees Laxative Cough Syrup for coughs croup and whooping cough claiming prompt relief gentle laxative effects and immediate relief with a money back guarantee. Sold by O W Sparks.
A tale from Ladies' Home Journal noting a pawnbroker interjects that the inventor of interest was the greatest of all, sparking jokes about Edison, Watt, Morse, and others in a discussion on who deserves credit.
An aged Jersey farmer visiting a circus for the first time stares in disbelief at a dromedary. He studies the creature’s legs and features in stunned silence for fifteen minutes before declaring with disgust that there is no such animal.
A Pearson's Weekly vignette describes a wajf from the slums tasting country life. At breakfast he is offered a new laid egg as a treat but rejects it after one spoonful, preferring bread and butter. The matron asks why, and the boy replies that he dislikes the taste.
A Cleveland Leader snippet shows Dolly refusing to wash her face while Grandma chides her recalling childhood washing habits. The light exchange captures a domestic moment and playful tone.
Washington Herald notes a change as the town goes from one church to two, not by revival but by a split. The brief item highlights a local religious realignment and its impact on the community’s spiritual landscape.
Lincoln quote reflects personal insight into hardship and self-awareness, underscoring how lived experience reveals true burdens.
Advertised letters include Domenico D Felice Hyman Grossman Samuel Mitchell Joe Ruggiero William Williams and several Mrs titles Mary Harper H H Fuller MelIntyre Wm Rohrig with Miss Annie Cleary noted as Fortegn more details not provided.
A local remedy called Pine salve by O W Sparks is described as an antiseptic poultice that draws out inflammation and poison. It is marketed for chapped hands and lips, cat burns, and general healing.
A King s Dyspepsia Tablet promises relief after meals for indigestion and stomach ills with a two days trial free. Available through our dealer who offers this product for sale and distribution.
An old couple share a meal with their returning son who boasts about college studies in logic. He asserts three chickens are present and demonstrates reasoning by forking the dishes. The father agrees, offering two halves to himself and mother, leaving the third for John while the judge notes the lesson on logic.
The St Louis Republic cites Sir John Mandeville’s Travels from 1499 to explain the origin of crocodile tears. It notes descriptions of Cokadrilies that dwell in water by night and hunt on land, slaying men and devouring prey without tongues.
A commercial traveler visits Mr Brown the village grocer and asks for the owner. A young clerk, resembling a son, reveals he is Mr Brown’s son and will fetch the elder. The traveler notes the era favors youth over age in this observation from London Answers.
Charming effects can be obtained from old baskets by painting, adding enamel, and decorating with ribbons, mistletoe, holly, and crepe paper. Use white or green enamel, cream rims, and a satin ribbon bow. Include a napkin and a season’s greeting card for a festive homemade candy hamper.
A simple craft describes converting a coffee tin into a hatpin holder. Remove lid, fill with wool or rags, cover with two rounds of sateen, stitch along the tin, add a muslin or lace cover with frills, and finish with ribbon ties at top and bottom.
A yard of sash ribbon of handsome quality may be quickly converted into a party or corset bag. Heavy black satin ribbon brocaded in white or lilac flowers in width about two inches makes the nicest spectacle case, while a wider ribbon in fancy colors forms an oblong fan bag for a younger friend.
A convenient needlecase made of bronze kid bound with silk ribbon holds needles of every description, a half dozen pockets for thread, another for a thimble, and a case for pins.
The exchange features Miss Blondlock denying claims her hair is bleached while Miss Ravenwing admits the rumor and says she told others it was bleached before Blondlock's arrival, as reported by the London Telegraph.
A business man quotes the New York Press remark on conceit, noting a conceited person’s density and unawareness of how he irritates others. He compares the self illusion to an ostrich with its head in the sand, arguing such individuals refuse to acknowledge their disagreeable trait.
A trio of sisters discuss a little girl named Marian reading aloud. Marian insists she understands half of the heavy book titled The Wide Awake World, while her big sister doubts her grasp of the content.
A Cincinnati Inquirer excerpt presents a heated exchange about trust. One speaker defends Beasley as loyal despite accusations, insisting they would risk their life for him, while the other questions the loan and Beasley’s character.
A Cassier's Magazine perspective asserts that in the future the engineer in its broad sense will be essential to social progress and the ultimate physical well being of mankind, with progress depending more on engineers and their inventions than on any other class.
A Chicago visitor faces a tart retort from a New Yorker about hog killing time, followed by a breezy reply praising local hospitality. The Philadelphia Press reports the exchange as a colorful exchange on manners and welcome.
A humorous exchange from Fliegende Blatter where a mother warns a future son in law that her daughter is well educated but cannot cook, and the suitor says it matters little if she does not try. The quip captures social expectations about marriage and domestic skills with witty restraint.
A fragment from the St. Louis Republic quotes a playful question about why birds look for worms when they could lay eggs. The passage reflects a humorous aside on avian behavior.
The article explains German and English legal ink made from bruised galls mixed with iron sulfate and gum arabic. It notes the ink’s indelibility relies on oak gall disease caused by the gallfly, which lays eggs in oak twigs triggering gall formation containing tannic acid for the ink.
A reflective note from Current Literature on how people value poetry drawings and songs. It discusses the varied audiences and tastes that define art and questions whether broad appeal or lasting impact determines greatness in poetry painting and music.
A London scraps snippet portrays Mrs. Jones, described as an old maid, as the bold borrower. She asks to borrow the husband for an hour to clean her sewing machine, thrash a man who insulted her, and discharge her book.
Silk manufacture began in China with the silkworm cultivated under Emperor Foh Li around 5000 B C. Spain first received silkworms from Arab conquerors in the 10th century. France founded its silk industry in 1516 when Francis I imported silk workers from Milan.
A nursemaid tells a mistress she plans to leave because the baby is so afraid of a policeman that she cannot approach one, highlighting a tense domestic moment reported in the London Tatler.
A historical gag about Richard Mansfield in a tragic scene where a near strangling prompted a comic fix. In the green room Mansfield reveals a leather neck collar with prongs to delay life insurance payment fears, leading to an apology from the strangle actor and a lasting change.
A Philadelphia Record anecdote recalls a river steamer skipper answering a passenger’s query about a fire escape. With no proper exit, he points to the rigging ladder on the mast and warns that in a real fire there could be trouble if passengers try to flee upward.
A Current Literature piece notes about 7000 books published yearly, most vanish, some gain temporary fame or translation. The universal book transcends national boundaries and taps universal emotions, though intensities vary by era and century.
In a perilous sea moment the ship wallowed under threat of capsizing. The captain lit rockets and flares to signal for help as a tall austere passenger rose to protest the perilous celebration, saying death looms and this is no time for festivity.
English John and Pat were two workmen known for playful banter. John asks how many shirts a yard yields and Pat replies it depends on whose yard you get into, turning a measurement question into a pun.
The London Reader notes the earliest possible reference to football in a 1314 Edward II proclamation banning “hustle over large balls” and cites the modern term appearing in Edward III era law of 1847 when football in London streets was outlawed.
Wijjit pledges country living with chickens and pigs and early garden toil while Mijjit argues the plan is not simple. The exchange appears in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and centers on the idea of a rustic lifestyle versus practicality.
A London Answers item quotes a lecturer declaring pride in being among the men behind the guns. A curious voice in the gallery asks how many miles behind, signaling audience doubt or humor in a moment of wartime diction.
A Yonkers Statesman snippet recalls a brother famed for fishing luck. Patrice confirms the belief, noting his widespread reputation for success and luck as a fisherman.
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