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This newspaper page contains 11 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Big Timber Pioneer
Location
Big Timber, Montana, United States of America
Date
Jun 08, 1905
Page
2
Reverend Jacob D. Van Doren of Fond Du Lac Wisconsin reports kidney disorder attacks kept him home for days. He credits Dean's Kidney Pills with general health improvement and relief, selling at 50 cents by Foster Milburn Co Buffalo NY.
A boarder with a bad cold explains he only tried to pass the time of day, prompting surprised exclamations from fellow boarders who mishear his remark as good boarding, then apologize for the mix up.
Atlanta groups oppose J Pope Brown plan to cut mileage rate from three to two cents. The Brotherhood of Locomotive Engineers and the Order of Railway Conductors join unions for blacksmiths machinists telegraphers boilermakers railway train men carpenters joiners clerks and car men. They warn the move would hurt state prosperity and reduce railroad jobs and wages. The Travelers Protective Association also objects to fewer trains and poorer service.
In a candid exchange Mr. Meekton’s wife Henrietta asks if he has ever deceived her. He admits he has not been totally frank and confesses to dissembling to seem more amiable than he felt.
Alfred Wilson reports two fields on his home farm in 1903 with yields of 37 and 25 bushels per acre at 88 cents per bushel. He details summer-fallow costs, seed, harvesting, threshing, and hauling, noting total profits per acre and per field. He also states total wheat and oats and barley on other farms.
A professor recalls a man who learned spelling while standing, then with a pencil, and finally with a typewriter. The tale shows how orthography skills shift with changing tools, leaving the man’s tongue and pencil unable to aid him and forcing reliance on a machine.
A mountain log church tale shows two parents seeking baptism for a baby. The father names the child Beelzebub but the bishop insists on John. The couple exits puzzled as the father shouts that the infant’s head is a gal baby, ending the ceremony with bemused dignity.
A wise man foresees humanity’s demise in about three million years with extinction and birds filling the void. He notes lovers’ sweet talk foreshadowing future birdlike humans and urges attention to this curious idea from the Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
In a county court a suit for 125 dollars, the purchase price of a painting, proceeded after the defendant offered 10 as its value. The artist who painted the canvas testified under cross examination that the work did possess artistic merit. He stated that a lawyer would have painted it in the most glowing colors, and the verdict awarded the plaintiff the claimed amount.
A traveler on a Transvaal rail trip hears two delays blamed on a cow on the line. The guard reveals the second stoppage is caused by the same old cow, not a new animal, ending the anecdote with a deadpan punchline.
An advertisement style summary of Dr. Pierce products and other remedies, touting Favorite Prescription and Golden Medical Discovery as non opium medicines. It features a testimonial by Mrs Harrigan of Sioux City and emphasizes cures for female disorders, nerve weakness, and general vitality. Additional products include Dr. Pierces Pellets, Mother Gray powders, and Kennedy remedies with promotional appeals and directions to obtain texts.
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