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Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Sep 26, 1912
Page
3
A busily domestic scene from Harper's Weekly shows Mr Jolliboy telling his wife he will miss dinner for an old friend Bill Peters in town while Mrs Jolliboy notes she will be out too by recalling a telephone call from her friend George Watkins. They dine at home together.
Important to Mothers urges careful inspection of CASTORIA bottles for the legitimate signature of ary Titeddl as a trusted remedy for infants and children. The notice underscores Castoria’s use for over 30 years and notes that children cry for Fletcher's Castoria.
The minister spoke for about an hour this morning, conveying the sermon’s main focus and message to attendees.
A light exchange shows a couple debating tandem canoeing with humor. She dismisses the idea noting the need to sit together constantly while he presses for the activity.
Richard Harding Davis, while in Atlantic City on his honeymoon, criticized modern fiction at a fish luncheon. He quipped that contemporary tales taste of double entendre, citing a florid parlor maid exchange as an example of disingenuous dialogue.
The National Association for the Study and Prevention of Tuberculosis urges doctors to curb sending patients West for health reasons and asks railroads to stop charity fares. It states no consumptive should go to Colorado California or the West unless recovery chances and funds of at least $1000 exist. Tuberculosis can be cured anywhere in the United States.
A South Dakota woman writes that thirteen years of coffee caused a nervous wreck and illness, and quitting coffee for Postum improved her health. She notes better reading, steadier nerves, appetite, sleep, and urges others to try Postum with claims of genuine letters from users. The ad cites Postum Co. Battle Creek Michigan and promotes The Road to Wellville.
Fragmented set of humorous and quirky newspaper blurbs. Items include a doctor advice gag about aging in the Balkans with fermented buttermilk, a defeated candidate congratulating the winner, a cow not Jersey verdict with damage award, a brass band at a ratification meeting, and a fashionably late bride who becomes reactionary.
A dialogue contrasts a person spending two days in the country with two days in the city and expresses satisfaction with the alternating routine. The speaker calls the plan a great scheme and praises constant contentment.
A humorous exchange contrasts imagined bad and good times. A fat man complains about modern conditions while a slim man argues progress has improved life, noting worries about untied shoe strings as a marker of past simplicity.
A humorous quote reflects urban residents appreciating summer warmth as a relief from constant fighting for steam from building pipes. The speaker contrasts city life with the need to negotiate with a janitor to get adequate steam.
A warning poem advises men not to gamble with police, suggesting safe play in sports like sprints and leaps while avoiding risky encounters with law enforcement. The verses contrast lawful competition with dangerous, ill advised bets.
A brief dialogue describes a town boasting good streets lighting and shipping facilities and strong trade. A visitor asks about the local ball team, prompting a reply that hints at pride and potential prospects for investment or relocation.
In a witty exchange two figures debate Plimpson’s style and the color of their own eyewear. One remarks Plimpson’s garments hurt his eyes. the other suggests green goggles to endure the talk, while noting the conversation isn’t worth much.
The total inhabitants now stand at 50 542, down 4 210 from ten years ago. A quip notes that suffragettes may not be to blame for people leaving a place with a harsh name.
Mr Rafferty asks for definition of harmony in politics. Mr Dolan defines harmony as the condition after one man has demonstrated the ability to whip a crowd.
Mme Bashley notes Ruskin titles reveal what they are not about while Mme Smithson questions. The pair discuss how his book titles convey absent topics, reflecting on American Reformer style humor.
A summer boarder salutes the pleasant woodland air while a town lover remarks that occasionally a breeze imitates an electric fan, hinting at a quiet, humorous debate over rural charm versus urban comfort.
A comic line features Farmer Cornfosgel sarcastically praising his congressman for “giving away all garden seeds” instead of growing crops himself, illustrating a humorous jab at political figures and farming.
A comic sketch praises Dibble as a warmhearted fellow and notes his generous impulses could “glow,” humorously suggesting he might even set his clothes on fire with the effort.
A boy scout was teaching young Indigenous boys how to make traps and track game on a Indian reservation, an activity described as sad by observers. The scene highlighted cultural differences and concerns about youth guidance in a constrained setting.
A warden suggests diplomacy and offers sweets to suffragettes who refuse meals. The exchange indicates heightened tension in the prison over hunger strikes and protest tactics.
In a light hearted exchange Daisy jokes about waves blowing out while Daly enjoys watching them blow in. The banter captures seaside humor between two characters.
A whimsical line pledges a retreat from busy trade to an imagined ice cream isle amid a lake of lemonade. The playful verse presents a wish for quiet, indulgent escape and carefree summer imagery.
A girl recalls screaming at a small green snake while a cadet nearby rushed to her aid. She admits she is not afraid of snakes but notes the cadet’s timely rescue created a dramatic moment.
A sixteen year old expresses a wish to join a newspaper staff and jokes about running the love lorn department, reflecting youthful ambition and humor in a lighthearted exchange.
A public figure known for large charitable gifts is described as admirable yet unable to discreetly tip a waiter, revealing a clash between generous acts and subtle social behavior. The dialogue underscores expectations of modesty in philanthropy.
A dialogue notes Mrs Jibbs avoiding a course aimed at broadening women’s lives. Another speaker suggests she cannot undertake it and hints she is trying to shed fat, reflecting gender norms and vanity in a casual exchange.
A college student explains his daily work on ball grounds to maintain conditioning. He has trained to show high batting and base-running averages to advance his class status in the fall.
A brief cartoon gag features a diminutive monkey declaring he cannot be mocked, while the taller figure protests copyright limits, yielding a humorous clash over ownership and bluster.
A fragmented verse reflects frustration with stale views and a demand to redefine oneself to secure employment, portraying a speaker stranded by outdated expectations. It emphasizes self reinvention as a prerequisite to progress.
The piece notes American athletes pushing limits in Stockholm while implying clever, unusual methods to set or break records. Swedish venues and crowds backdrop a vivid contrast to U S performance in this compact feature.
A playful exchange questions why a wife makes peculiar motions. The husband recalls she was a leader in fly swatting as a girl and was a champion fly swatter before marriage and settling down.
A talkative girl fears solid gold bags and the chaos they cause. She mocks owners who flaunt such bags, recounts a string of misadventures from theater to lake resort, and ends with a playful cue for the bag to be taken along by the departing man. The piece humorously satirizes materialism through exaggerated scenarios involving gold bags and social spectacles.
The cone shaped felt hats given to freed slaves in ancient Rome became a symbol of liberty after Nero's death. Romans wore pointed hats to mark release from tyranny. Later the Netherlands adopted a similar hat in its coat of arms following independence from Spain.
In Luzon, Philippines, a dwarf race named the Aetas averages four feet eight or nine inches. They inhabit interior mountains, supporting theories that dwarf peoples survive best in the most inaccessible areas of continents or islands.
A sermon on Mark 6 30 44 and John 6 48 ct emphasizes Jesus teaching first, then feeding the crowd with five loaves and two fish. It notes disciples Philip and Andrew doubting, the boy with lunch, and the miracle showing God supplies through human effort.
Remedy promoted with hot douches of Paxtine Antiseptic available from The Paxton Toilet Co Boston Mass. Box price 25 cents or by mail order on receipt of price.
Hobson and Harduppe discuss Snips the tailor with wary humor. Hobson questions suitability while Harduppe insists on paying in advance to secure service.
Public notice style ad claims Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup calms teething pain and reduces gum inflammation. Offers 25 cents per bottle.
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