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This newspaper page contains 26 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Sep 26, 1912
Page
2
A collection of wry observations and playful aphorisms on daily life. Topics range from weather and harvest labor to quirky health quips and light political jokes. The tone mimics a newspaper humor page with ironic twists and dated cultural references.
A playful roundup of quirky facts and tall tales including a grasshopper’s jump compared to a politician in a wagging tale. A New Jersey woman uses whisky to repel flies while a New York resident is struck by lightning and allegedly cured of rheumatism. Composers and proofreaders are teased about the long Hawaiian fish names.
The king of Sweden summoned the Indian all-around Olympic champion to the royal palace but the winner declined to attend. The refusal caused embarrassment for the royal entourage and highlighted the unusual clash between personal choice and royal command.
A Philadelphia man died while telling a joke in a public setting. The incident prompts debate on social interests and whether harsher consequences for reckless humor would benefit society.
A defaulting county treasurer was paroled on condition he repay the money taken in installments. The court set an installment plan that could take over 150 years to cover the total sum, with failure risking more drastic legal action.
In New Orleans the school board adopts a rule prohibiting a pretty teacher from kissing her pupils. Teachers assume the rule applies to them, triggering widespread compliance.
A Chicago man stole a piece of ice then tongs to handle it and an umbrella to keep the ice from melting. The police intervened as the chain of petty thefts grew, described as a progressive fall from grace.
An Iowa State College effort under Dean Curtiss aims to combine Shire Clyde and Percheron strengths to create a versatile draft horse. The piece notes virtues of each breed, the need for proper conformation, and the potential of inbreeding to refine the new blend while stressing adaptation to local conditions.
The article argues nitrogen decides soil fertility more than any other element. It explains nitrogen balances air, enables life, and counts as the principal soil factor for crop richness. It notes soils vary in nitrogen content, affecting plant protein, flesh, butter, and eggs through feeding crops.
The article advises growing peas and tomatoes together where markets exist. Plant peas as soon as soil is workable and set tomatoes after frost danger, typically around May 15 to 20 in the north. When pea rows are four feet apart, remove two or three plants at required distances to create spaces.
A cautious farmer warns against chasing high profits from onions or any crop. He notes that readers who are drawn to claims of 1000 to 2000 dollars per acre may plant too much too soon without testing soil climate storage or markets. He urges proper discretion and small initial plantings.
An agricultural note explains tomato plants set four feet apart in rows and pea plants removed at four foot intervals. The method reportedly succeeded in Pennsylvania.
Nine parts of corn and one part of tankage form the best and cheapest ration for growing shoats. This mix reduces corn use per pound of gain versus a corn only diet.
A guidance piece discusses relief for eye strain from close work like writing. It recommends frequent distant gazes, visual rests, proper lighting, eyecup and antiseptic eye washes, occasional glasses, cold eye packs, and avoiding glare. It also covers simple cosmetics to create a softer evening look using pencils and subtle shading.
A mother's fortieth birthday party plan features a forty candle ring, letters from old friends, inscribed fans, and forty roses. Separately, the National Dairy Show announces a Chicago 1912 event with top judges, government exhibits, and demonstrations by Borden Milk, Blue Valley Creamery, and Consumers Company, highlighting dairy science and industry practices.
Crocheted buttons adorn linen suits and dresses for summer wear and can be made at home by the needle worker. Newer designs feature a small crocheted rose in the center with colored linen or silk button molds and chain stitching to enlarge the rose.
Many women report small rips in silk stockings and blame the fabric or workmanship. The real cause is often fingernail rings with stones catching threads and breaking them during wear.
Annie asks about age appropriate fashion and courting. Guidance: a 15 year old may wear sandals mainly beachwear or informal country outfits. dresses should reach tops of high shoes. hair in Madonna braids or a soft rolled style. avoid talking to strangers. boys should not attempt to kiss girls and should be corrected. a 13 year old should not have male callers.
Notes advise writing to desired guests and sending announcements to others. Entertainment is not required as the ceremony itself serves as diversion. The bride cuts the cake herself while someone else handles the knife work, symbolizing her new role as hostess at the table.
Sidney asks for an easy yet nice menu for an afternoon gathering. Suggestions emphasize cards, musicales, and thimble parties with light refreshments. Pair simple bites with coffee or tea, and in warm weather offer a small frozen item with tiny cakes and delicate sandwiches.
The writer proposes a large outdoor picnic for multiple lodges with games and contests organized by age and gender. Suggested amusements include a peanut hunt with a prize for the winner and a refreshment pairing of partners by matching flags of all nations, using paper flags as souvenirs.
Madame Merrl notes that couples usually go to the dining room for refreshments first and that etiquette calls for a fully dressed bridegroom after six. She adds that circumstances may alter cases and that society’s demands guide practice.
The provided text presents a dialogue about post hospital stay and healing, with references to a doctor and a pie gesture. It includes a literary exchange showing voice and tone rather than a clear news event or report.
A Bent Passage resident describes severe eczema affecting face scalp hands feet and legs. He reports no relief from other remedies until Cuticura Soap and Ointment, used as directed, cured him in about three weeks. The ad promotes free samples and the world distribution of Cuticura products.
Ad claims Cole's Carbolisalve stops pain quickly with no scar. Sold by all druggists, 25 cents and up.
An advertisement feature extols Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound with patient testimonials from Mrs. Mary Halstead of Platea Pennsylvania and Mrs. Amelia Danl of Walcott North Dakota describing relief from nervousness backache and depression. The piece also lists several farm property for sale in Wisconsin Minnesota and Alberta with details on size improvements and agents in Chicago.
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