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Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
May 08, 1913
Page
3
An old advertisement touts Resinol Ointment and Resinol Soap as instant itch relief and skin healing. It claims treatment for eczema rash ringworm tetter and other eruptions plus clearer skin and fewer pimples with free samples offered from Dept. 9 K Resinol Baltimore Maryland.
A collection of brief lines mentions charitable work, Mrs. Austins pancakes, goat delivery, Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup for teething and wind colic, and a jab at politics as a game versus business. The items read like old newspaper fillers or ads with period flavor.
A street vendor offers strawberries at eight quarters per box. The buyer notes the fruit looks poor but the dealer insists the quantity poses no harm despite the low quality.
The Erratic Thinker, calling himself mean, reflects on family misdeeds and jokes about corsets growing so long that wearers must roll them up from the ankles to avoid stepping on them. This light quote comes from the Kansas City Star.
A boarding school pupil, allowed to walk alone, is questioned after smashing a corner loafer in the face. She insists the man winked at her, amid talk of his alter ego and a single eye.
A keen observer notes that she remains remarkably precise and consistently triumphant when she competes for prizes, turning every cut into a winning moment. Her sharp technique and steady nerve underpin a pattern of frequent victories in judged events.
A humorous exchange contrasts a cow and a city milkman. The cow yields pure milk but gives no credit, while a milkman can provide reliable credit. The setting shifts to Mrs. Flatleigh noting a new upstairs family with money, observed by their half eaten lobster and Camembert in the garbage.
Ralph remarks on a beautiful view reminding him of Scotland as Rose recalls attending a lecture. The brief exchange captures a shared memory and a moment of cultural reflection.
A note from The Amateur Gardener about spending on garden seeds to grow succotash locally. The author mentions buying seeds and starting a small garden venture.
A playful exchange hints editors prize a snappy writer a sharp reporter and a sharp society editor. The mock motto elevates speed and wit over tradition in newsroom culture.
In a market encounter Mrs Ryan greets Mrs McCarthy with good morning and asks about neighbors. Mrs McCarthy replies most are well except her husband who had been ill but this morning feels somewhat better, per the Youth's Companion.
A fragment discusses a new soprano and skepticism about her abilities. The speaker recalls endorsing her, yet notes other sopranos are not showing jealousy, hinting at possible bias or unseen tensions within the chorus.
A jumble of quips and one liners appear as brief bits featuring a mock dialogue about pearls bigamy debt and suffragettes. The snippets showcase puns and banter with names Wimble Gimble and Wombat as they trade barbs and playful insults.
A collage of humorous exchanges on tastes from shoes to cars and cigarettes. A joke about persistence and a joke about a pharmacist and gum drops reflect playful social observations in brief phrases.
Society buds and wallflowers dominate the ballroom decor this season. The style emphasizes restrained floral arrangements, soft lighting, and elegant draperies to create intimate social spaces.
A humor page riffs on social satire with quips about bears eating children, Wall Street scandals, a goat who eats newspapers, and a politician kiss scandal. Jests about King George patenting a coal stove and a daughter remarking on her father’s election maneuver close the mockument.
A brief dialogue excerpt shows Count and Heiress discussing unusual weather and an overcoat, with Heiress remarking on luck and the Count noting a saved ticket. The scene hints at a social interaction centered on fortune and a missing ticket.
A Swedish paper's People’s Voice column quotes a 1913 letter from near Davidson Saskatchewan about weather and farm yields. It reports 30-35 bushels of wheat per acre 60 bushels of oats and about 20 bushels of flax, notes land availability, and cites Alberta sunshine data and Edmonton bright sun hours amid a harsh winter pattern. The piece contrasts 1913 with 1912 and mentions severe global weather trends.
In the New Palace at Potsdam a genealogical tree places King David at the root with the Kaiser atop the line through his mother’s line. It claims Great Britain’s royal house descends from David via the elder daughter of Zedekiah, who fled to Ireland with Jeremiah and married Hermon of Ulster. The Kaiser reportedly enjoys this display in his study.
In Abbotsford Wisconsin a mother describes her son suffering from eczema on his hands for a year. After using Cuticura Soap and Ointment twice daily for six months his hands healed completely. The ad promotes Cuticura products and features a Boston contact.
A humorous exchange unfolds as a daughter asks George about drinking. George admits occasional use, fearing her father’s reaction. The father reveals his stance by saying he does not care if he drinks, signaling surprising approval.
An advertising brief touts Dr. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets as sugar coated granules that regulate and invigorate the stomach liver and bowels, noting they first appeared about 40 years ago.
A short vignette depicts two women debating fashion and mood. The dialogue centers on a hatpin and a sly jab at temper. The piece hints at themes of love and daily patience within a domestic setting.
The dialogue features Bildad pressuring Miss Jeerwell to define the ideal man, who responds that terms are contradictory. The exchange conveys wit about aging and youth as well as the gap between perception and reality. A fragmentary note references humorous snippets about parcel post and a Liver package joke.
A quarrel unfolds as a woman laments past hand holding before marriage while her husband jokes that affection would interfere with her duties to her spouse. The exchange hints at domestic strain and evolving attitudes toward marriage roles.
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