Sister marries bargain hunter for 50 percent off deal
Joe asks why his sister wed a "halfwit" and Jack jokes she chased every sale. The punchline notes she is an inveterate bargain hunter who cannot resist 50 percent off offers.
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Newspaper
Whitewright Sun
Location
Whitewright, Texas, United States of America
Date
Feb 25, 1965
Page
3
Joe asks why his sister wed a "halfwit" and Jack jokes she chased every sale. The punchline notes she is an inveterate bargain hunter who cannot resist 50 percent off offers.
A fragmented report notes a space-gas event appearing in the heart of a con scene on Earth. A native is asked to help transport the speaker to a safe location amid the unusual phenomenon.
Fragment notes a cryptic interaction where a woman demands a leader and others debate between Mobutu and Lumumba while promising to dance later. The snippet implies political tension amid a casual scene. No clear event dates or places are provided.
A quip attributes diplomacy to persuasion, describing a man who can convince his wife that she looks fat in a fur coat. The joke frames diplomacy as managing personal perception with tact.
A mother counsels her daughter on marriage ideals saying the union rests on give and take. If the husband does not give enough, she should take it, reflecting a troubling and pragmatic view of intimate roles.
Mrs Smith waits at the door with four children’s coats and gear. Her husband comes down the stairs and asks why she stands there. She says she will honk the horn while he helps the children into their outfits.
The new secretary ignores the ringing phone and after minutes of aggravation the boss orders her to pick up. She jokes that it must be for him since none of her friends know she is there yet.
The Mayor hosts a dinner with Joseph Chamberlain as guest of honor. During coffee, the Mayor leans in and asks if they should wait for the speech, or proceed. Elsewhere a golfer is interrupted by a bride-to-be rushing from the country club, and he tells her only if it rains.
A note encouraging readers to use want ads for selling items. It highlights advertising options and practical steps to reach potential buyers through classified sections.
Mrs. Fred Garner visits relatives in Fort Worth. Judy Gosnell of TCU spends weekend at home. Mrs. Darwin and Mrs. Gosnell visit Fritz Cochran in Baylor Hospital Dallas. NTSC student Pattye Badgett stays with mother. Oklahoma City resident W A Mynatt spending week in W E Mynatt home. Several residents hospitalized in Sherman. Leora Short fractures foot at Lilley store and is treated in Denison Madonna Hospital. Families from Garland Dallas Phoenix and Abilene visit relatives. Church group meetings and bridge clubs held. notices urge timely news reports and weather disruptions.
The mother of Clarence Hammond in Washington DC contracted German measles early in pregnancy and doctors say he was born mentally retarded with deafness cataracts a cardiac murmur and speech difficulties. At the March of Dimes Birth Defects Center at Children’s Hospital Dr Beale H Ong checks Clarence’s focusing ability. The program supports 250000 American babies born yearly with serious birth defects.
Employers are urged not to guess how to report employees earnings for social security. Both parties have much at stake and the simplest solution is to contact the local Internal Revenue or Social Security Office for guidance.
COLLEGE STATION Texas cotton growers embraced chemicals and machines to cut costs in 1964 despite reduced harvested acreage. Fred C Elliott of Texas A M says acres treated rose for pre emergence and post emergence chemicals DSMA use jumped to 273 469 acres, 51 000 rotary hoes operated in 173 counties, and harvest preparation technologies expanded under the 7 Step Cotton Program.
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