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Newspaper
Western Kansas World
Location
Wakeeney, Kansas, United States of America
Date
Nov 28, 1908
Page
7
A collage of humor lines from Chicago Daily News Puck Life Chicago News and Boston Transcript. Bits echo playful exchanges about schooling marriage and manners with a mischievous bite across several era papers. Notable quips include a teacher using gruesome in a sentence and a farmer’s Abnormal School jab.
Walter Rothwell, renowned German conductor, returns from Europe praising Lebar’s Merry Widow as superior to recent works. He compares it to classic operettas and notes its influence across five languages in five countries. Also mentions playful anecdotes and a fashion jab about a hat.
After a global search, the government of the Celestial Empire comes to New York seeking a man with the core qualifications to handle the Chinese currency issue. William A. Grant, a banker by trade, accepts the invitation and signs a five year contract.
Williast A Grant will pay expenses for himself and family to travel to China and provide a house in Peking with servants, rent, and supplies. He has left New York to catch the Manchuria at San Francisco for the Orient. Accompanying him as assistants are L J Hatch and Wit Mam Gifor.
New York based Dr Leo Ubbetohde a noted petroleum authority sails to Germany after touring the United States. He teaches at Karlsrube Technic Ligh school and serves as general secretary of the international commission on petroleum products. Ubbetohde was chosen Europe’s top authority to visit Pentayl vaom fields to unify petroleum testing. The appointment had the assent of the German emperor and President Roosevelt concurred assigning Dr Ubbetohde.
Geological Survey chief David T. Day will join Fr Abbelohde on a forthcoming tour. Philadelphia’s Up-to-Date Street Cars claim 50 new pay-with enter cars improve safety and efficiency with automatic doors, closed platforms in motion, and rear-entrance only.
Fresh air babies are the aerophytes or epiphytes, air plants not growing in earth but in air on trees. They derive moisture from the atmosphere, distinguishing them from terrestrial plants. In South America they grow on orange trees among crumbling carnations, forming pink clumps on a single stalk.
The University of Kansas held memorial exercises for ex Chancellor Francis Huntingdon Snow in the university chapel. Faculty, students, and Lawrence citizens attended, with state officials and educators from Washburn College also present. The event honored the noted Kansas scientist who died in Delafield Wisconsin on September 21.
County attorney Bucher, first to close all saloons and gambling places, resigns. Hal R. Clark elected and qualified as Montgomery County attorney. Football bystander Charles Marker dies from injuries at a Great Bend game. YWCA officers chosen at Wichita. Kansas constitution amendments defeated. Jean Noble gains French government purchase for The Benediction of the Sea. Wolf in custody in Kansas City. Bertha Snooks, 18, dies by suicide. Teddy Paxton, 12, shoots sibling accidentally. Three ex-Kanecans become governors.
A party of editors describe Western Canada as undeveloped yet full of possibility during a summer outing. They note land policy changes allowing 160 acres at $3.00 plus 160 more homesteaded, report strong 1908 crops with Milestone yields around 30 bushels per acre, and forecast grain shipments near 600,000 bushels.
Tennessee woman shares a turning point after quitting coffee for Postum. She describes stomach relief, renewed strength, steadier nerves, and improved digestion after five years of using Postum, asserting it gave her an upward start.
An advertisement extols Syrup of Figs and Elixir of Senna as a natural laxative pleasing to the system. It asserts the product cleanses and sweetens internal organs without debility, claims physician approval, and urges purchase of the genuine California Fig Syrup Co. remedy from leading druggists.
In a theaterside exchange Flossie Footlight claims a Japanese wedding rite includes burning discarded toys of the bride. Winnie Wings reacts with horror asking if she means cremating the bride’s cast-off toys.
Mrs. Enos Shearer of Centralia Washington recounts years of weakness and sleeplessness with swollen limbs and intense pains. Despite four months bedridden and three doctors declaring no cure, she reports recovery after using Dean's Ridney Pills, now sold nationwide. A reader riddle about nothing and a medical ad for Deafness cure accompany the page.
A quip wonders what a female chemist should be called after noting the Pereira medal, a blue ribbon in pharmacy, and puns on a chem sette. The ad notes cheap Ball Blue cleaner and a charity saying about failing to travel.
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