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This newspaper page contains 25 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Washburn Times
Location
Washburn, Wisconsin, United States of America
Date
May 21, 1908
Page
7
The excerpt presents brief anecdotes and morals from humorous magazine titles. It includes a jailer joke about a man marrying a domineering wife, a poetic line about labor as holy service, a fast exchange over a patient and a will, and a tale of a boy genius who designs a garden for three dollars that costs thirty seven.
A tale from Sewanee recounts Bishop Green during a diocesan visit asking for nutmeg at supper. The hostess cannot find any in town, prompting a scramble among neighbors and a humorous ending about a makeshift grated substitute.
A dinner in a major city features Joseph Chamberlain as guest of honor with the mayor presiding and a playful prompt about delivering his speech. A one armed man at a restaurant enjoys a tense moment when a neighbor notices his missing arm and the exchange ends with a comic surprise. The column humorously surveys varied handshakes and social graces on Johnsons Europe trip and in crowds.
A pasted humor piece mixes curious terms from early first aid with a zany tale about a peacock egg dispute. It features exaggerated handshakes the tourniquet shake and cordial grapples, then shifts to a lawyer’s quip about a peacock laying an egg and a lack of precedent.
A judge discharges a jurors panel in a striking case and one juror protests he is hired by the defendant. A letter from a man with a bullet in his thorax prompts a witty response from a famous medical specialist offering to treat remotely.
Dialogue reveals a patriarchal hurdle as a suitor seeks approval from a wife-led household. The exchange hints at strategic maneuvering within a family to secure consent for an impending match.
A daughter suspects deception by George over a Christmas collar pin she believes cost $25. She learns a near-identical pin is selling for $5. The mother gently defends George, suggesting the pin came from a church fair and reflects his religious nature.
Two children awaken to news of a new little brother. They wonder who brought him, and the girl quips it must be the milkman because the card reads Families Supplied.
H. J. Shannon in Harper's Magazine explains the Sarsia mirabilis as a translucent jellyfish spawn near spring shores. The article depicts its double chambered bell, trailing tentacles, and responsive senses despite lacking a head or limbs. It likens the creature to Ariel of the deep, awakening the ocean to life.
A London Answers brief recalls Suzie a girl who spell s g o o d and w o o d aloud. The teacher corrects her, then in class the phrase Up, up Jane the sun is risen appears. Suzie responds with a playful twist: Double up Jane the sun has risen.
A Philadelphia school board member recalls a northern Pennsylvania schoolhouse where a stern master keeps students focused on arithmetic. He notices a pupil more absorbed in a piece of pie than the lesson and scolds, "William, will you pay attention?" The boy replies, "I'm listening, sir," prompting the retort that he is listening with one ear and eating pie with the other.
In northern India sheep are used as pack animals along steep mountain paths. Each sheep carries sixteen to twenty pounds, driven from village to village with wool growing, farmers shear for sale in each town, and load the sheep with grain in exchange.
State of Wisconsin Bayfield County Probate notice states Administrator H P Axelberg will sell at public auction on May 19 1908 at 10am at the front door of the Washburn Court House land in Bayfield County Town of Washburn Lots 6 7 and 8 in Block 53 Original Townsite now City of Washburn with cash terms. Dated April 14 1908 Wm H Irish County Judge.
Department of the Interior Land Office at Wausau Wis gives notice Charlies Brunner of Washburn Wisconsin filed intention to make final five year proof to establish his homestead claim No 5808 for NW NW and SW NW% Section 2 Township 49 N Range 6 W 4th P Meridian before Bayfield County Circuit Court Clerk Washburn Wis on June 10 1908. Witnesses named Charles H. Smith John Donahue Nels Westerlund and Thomas Francis all of Washburn Wis. John W. Miller Register.
Blood passes through the kidneys every three minutes as they filter toxins night and day. Healthy kidneys remove about 500 grains of impurities daily. illness leaves toxins in blood causing backache headaches nervousness dry skin and other symptoms. A testimonial from Margaret Sands praises Dean's Kidney Pills for restoring strength and kidney function. Sold by all dealers 50 cents Foster Milburn Co Buffalo NY sole US agents. Remember the name Dean's.
In Willimantic Connecticut Alvin H Stimpson credits Foley s Kidney Cure with his recovery from acute kidney trouble after other remedies failed He says four bottles cured him completely and he is now entirely well The testimonial comes from Q W Frost and is part of a New England states feature on the cure s virtues.
Itching bleeding protruding or blind piles yield to Dean's Ointment with chronic cases soon relieved and finally cured. Druggists all sell it.
County Judge W.4H Irish Municipal Judge A. M. Warden Municipal Judge Second Municipal Court Sative Sheriff A. B. Severson Clerk N. M. Oscar Treasurer John Freseth Register of Deeds Nels Myhre Clerk of Circuit Court F A Bell District Attorney E C Alverd Superintendent of schools Miss J Smith Coroner H G Mertens Surveyor Hugo Nelson
Mayor Geo. Dibbell, Treasurer Nels Lee, Clerk H. P. Axelberg, Assessor Nels Westerlund and Chief of Police O. Wescott are recorded in the city roster. The document outlines the names and positions of key municipal officers.
Tired nerves and low spring energy are claimed to improve quickly with Dr Shoops Restorative a universal tonic for nerves digestion and appetite It is said to renew strength vigor and ambition and is sold by all dealers.
Advertisement from a Chicago wholesale and mail order house seeks an assistant manager for the county and adjoining territory. Salary twenty dollars with weekly expenses paid and advance expense money. Pleasant permanent position no investment or experience required. Spare time valuable. Send for full particulars with self addressed envelope to General Manager 134 EK Lake St Chicago.
Rev Chr Christianson, pastor, conducts Sunday services at 10 30 a m and 7 45 p m with Sunday School at noon. Prayer meeting Thursdays at 8 00 p m. Ladies Aid and Helping Hand Society meet alternate Wednesdays. All services in Norwegian except Sunday evening which is in English. third Sunday also in English.
Wanted by Chicago wholesale and mail order house assistant. Salary twenty dollars weekly plus expenses. Work pleasant and permanent. No addressed envelope. Apply Superintendent at 132 Lake St Chicago Illinois.
Notice to customers states Foley's Honey and Tar for coughs colds and lung troubles is not affected by the National Pure Food and Drug law as it contains no opiates or other harmful drugs and is recommended as a safe remedy for children and adults by Q. W. Frost.
Fox Bros guarantees refunds on Green's Syrup of Tarif bottles 50 cents and 25 cents if the remedy fails to cure coughs or colds. The undersigned pledge to refund money or provide satisfaction, ensuring customers can return products for full or proportional reimbursement.
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