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This newspaper page contains 14 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Vienna Progress
Location
Vienna, Georgia, United States of America
Date
May 21, 1895
Page
4
Mary Miller and her mother lease Meadow Farm and shelter Miss Abby Dabney from the Tewkstown Poorhouse. Abby’s nephew Cyrus Dabney, returning wealthy from Panama, arrives and vows to support his aunt, renewing the farm’s prospects and the sense of home.
In mid-century town lore Cyrus Dabney wooes Mary while Aunt Abby resists moving from the Dabney farmhouse. He asks to arrange Aunt Abby’s curios and Mary’s heart, and Aunt Abby introduces a “Mrs. Miller” as a guest of the couple. Cyrus declares love and engagement, and the two wed, staying on the old farm with Aunt Abby convinced they are her guests.
A collage of humor and quips from 19th and early 20th century sources. Items include jokes about the oyster’s temper, Little Nell, Burnley as a leech, a schoolyard quip comparing Sunday and everyday schooling, and banter about art prices and antiques.
The piece foresees three possible war outcomes with Japan and China shaping Asia: a Mongolian empire of 400 million under disciplined rule, a strong eastern naval power testing Europe, or a capable but exploited Asiatic labor-and-manufacturing force. It laments Britain’s cautious Parliament and media after discussing Siberian taiga vastness and dangers.
A collection of aphorisms on genius patience honesty and social conduct. Notes touch on courage discretion vanity misanthropy and the value of purposeful work with imagery of hearts flowers and hostess hospitality.
Three iron workers on a twenty second story girder atop Trinity’s steeple at Pine street and Broadway labored five hours above the city as pedestrians watched in awe. The wind stung and the men kept to their task, proving iron workers’ nerve and skill in building modern towers.
An episode in The Pearl of India describes a mimosa on a coffee plantation bungalow in Ceylon. A doctor tests the plant by asking Lena to kiss it, and the plant wilts when approached by a stranger, prompting the notion that the mimosa may sense familiar beings.
A French hustler sold rat powder claimed to kill rats at half a franc a box. He tested it by feeding a bread slice to a captive rat, which died instantly under a glass case. Police found the powder was sugar and the setup used an electric battery to kill the rat. The article ends noting cleansing tips using a whipper to beat dirt.
A collage of lighthearted vignettes from early 20th century humor pages. A would be engagement to a small major. remarks on income and change for a cent. a pale Bank overdraft joke. a racing lineage tale. a joke about busting popcorn. gossip about Mrs Gradley and a noisy town. The final skit shows a man learning his fiancée’s father failed for two millions and reacting with dramatic irony.
A young lady organist admires a neighboring pastor and learns he will preach at her church. An obstreperous sexton at the organ stops the music late, and the organist slips a note to him meant only for his eye. He hands it to the preacher who reads the message asking to be blown until a signal to stop.
A New York Advertiser piece quotes a leading bookseller on why sorrowful endings deter female readers. He notes women inspect endings, often returning books with unhappy conclusions, and even reads last pages to gauge sales potential. He observes the female trade prefers happier finales, with few exceptions.
A column riffs on the saying there is nothing new under the sun citing a 1672 Danish siege joke minted as a medal and recounts Polly Price, a shantyboat tenant fined at Louisa, who served as a Confederate soldier in the early war era while wearing men’s clothing and driving a team.
Mexico's coffee exports rose sharply from 2,420,000 to 5,990,009 in the last three months of 1894, reflecting a significant jump. The piece opens with a definition of a gentleman attributed to Ward McAllister, cited by the Chicago Times-Herald.
In Hebron Connecticut a county court docket notes a remarkable lease by the Society of the Propagation of the Gospel of Foreign Parts to 8 W Chase and heirs for 9999 years. The rent is one grain of silver or its value on St John’s day each year to church wardens John Sutton and J Peters or their successors. The term runs for 9899 years from the 25th of the current month.
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