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Newspaper
The Sidney Republican
Location
Sidney, Nebraska, United States of America
Date
Apr 05, 1902
Page
6
Notice John A Sulzer Seed Co of LaCrosse Wisconsin will mail you an omitted catalog offering all varieties of seeds including power and vegetable seeds for market gardeners with postage paid.
Robert Douglas of Paris Texas reports an oyster bed forming at the bottom of an old fill well after a child threw something in two years ago. The bed yields young oysters when a bucket is lowered. A quip contrasts homeopathy and allopathy as deaths from disease versus death from the cure.
A scrambled, quotation filled page warns against mercury containing tonics and touts various fake remedies. It mentions Wall's Catarrh Cure from Toledo, Po Cheney & Co, and Hall's Family Pills, with snippets of humorous ads and miscellaneous lines about cures, testimonials, and health quackery. The jumble includes children teething syrups and playful asides about salaries and wise men.
Clubhouses increasingly resemble hotels with lodging for members and guests. Some clubs expanded sleeping rooms and now rent to permanent tenants or transient lodgers, charging near hotel rates. Lodging durations range ten days to four weeks, with services from valets. tipping is modestly restricted for extra services.
An ad promotes Earliest Russian Milglet as a prolific hay substitute claiming up to 8 tons per acre with price points. A notice from Rev Sherry Pearson of Portland Maine jokes about a $100 reward for finding an open saloon, citing 271 open saloons at his election and zero in some county areas.
Daily during March and April, colonist tickets from Denver, Colorado Springs or Pueblo to California points at 28 dollars. Mall participants by calling or addressing JP Hall General Agent Santa Ke Denver Colorado.
Mrs Sophie Binns of Fruitvale Bal writes that Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound cured her ovarian congestion and inflammation after months of illness and a feared operation. She reports rapid relief in two months, continued use, and renewed health. A $5000 forfeit warns fakers.
A shy young minister bungles a wedding by reversing vows, making the bridegroom promise to love and obey. The father jokes about the outcome while the couple negotiates marriage terms. The bride mentions any day in June as suitable.
A speaker recalls early parents living as vegetarians, subsisting on vegetables nuts and fruits. A flamboyant critic questions whether a beefsteak would have improved their diet, prompting a tense exchange at the gathering.
A Boston six year old girl responds with sarcasm when a kind old man offers a cent. She thanks him and says she will use the money to buy the latest edition de luxe of Shakespeare’s works to add to her library.
A man of ideals cites George Washington's success and honesty. Senator Sorghum questions the old lore that Washington never lied, suggesting such tales may be political spin used to influence constituents.
Mrs Lakeside updates Edith and Florence, noting Edith plans a wedding on the 20th while Florence has just obtained a divorce on the 10th. The exchange hints at social hopes and relationship ambitions as townsfolk discuss marriages.
A traveler asks a man to donate to a veteran who has spent two years campaigning abroad. The other man questions whether the request means trekking or hiking, then dismisses the idea as foolish.
A fragment notes Jones built a barrel in a get rich quick scheme. It adds that he married Gotrox’s daughter, implying a scheme tied to a business or family alliance. The text is sparse and targets a sensational anecdote rather than a full incident.
A fragment from the Atlanta Constitution notes a street dialogue in West End about levity and personal weight, with a Chaucer-like aside about burning someone’s pride and a quip about 200 pounds, reflecting local banter and characterization.
A family scene unfolds as a girl and a family friend walk. The topic turns to birthdays and the girl reveals her birth month is June but not the exact day, prompting a request to provide the proper date for a medallion gift.
A fragment shows a man remarking a hat does not fit as a wife searches for a spring bonnet. The milliner jokes that hats fit heads, but notes spring hats trigger fits in men when the bill comes home, reflecting playful gender humor.
A fragment recalls a traveler asking if the Europe journey broadened their view. The response notes the trip cost eighty and that it left the person short on funds.
A quoted exchange recalls Percival J McIntosh, leading figure at Amalgamated, who began as an office boy and faced a nickname handicap. The dialogue notes his wealth reaching six million dollars, highlighting a rags to riches arc in a brief reminiscence.
In a sly exchange Longbean finishes a story noting the capture of two panthers was easy. A comic retort about liars being caught by their tales follows, with a playful hint at how he did it.
The line satirically blends domestic life and verse as a wife asks the poet to write love songs before breakfast to secure flour. He quips about not being hungry and disliking flour, turning the moment into a witty domestic vignette.
A fragment shows lovers planning an elopement with a late night departure at noon and meeting at a corner. They resolve to avoid a carriage to stay economical, while one character mentions having the father pay for the carriage. The tone suggests intimate domestic planning within constrained means.
A collage of quips from early 20th century papers. Jests about divorces, accidents, real estate hype, and theater etiquette appear in playful exchanges. Notable lines include a dogless cat joke, a railroad accident followed by a monetary claim, and a gag about two living cheaply as one. References to the New York Press Philadelphia Bulletin Tit-Bits Detroit Free Press Yonkers Statesman Washington Star Chicago Tribune Baltimore American frame the humor.
Colonel T. P. Moody a Chicago jeweler and lodge member praises Peruna after suffering catarrh for years. He claims complete relief and cites his wife’s improvement. The piece promotes Peruna as a remedy for catarrh and related illnesses, with an advance for a free catarrh book from The Peruna Medicine Co.
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