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Newspaper
Semi Weekly Herald
Location
Eldora, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Sep 27, 1905
Page
3
Milwaukeean Hannibal J. Driesbach reportedly quit drinking after promising his wife he would abstain from intoxicants for life. A rumor linked his arrest for grafting the same day, but no trustworthy source confirms this. A humor note follows on barber shop habits and a joke about a self shaved bar ber.
Eight months pass since Vane Hamilton vanished as Mrs. Fry and Constance grow entangled with Primus Edes through a coat found with a hidden letter. Mrs. Hamilton urges caution while a detective probes. Constance, drawn by Edes’s music and gentle manners, clings to the idea of her missing husband, even as scrutiny and village gossip swirl.
In a village near a marble shop, Constance Hamilton recognizes the tall, light-hatted man as her missing husband Vane Hamilton. A monument to him prepared in the spring prompts shock when she cries out upon seeing him, and Mr. Allen explains the absence and the promise of the future as the scene closes with a cliffhanger.
Sailors keep picturesque beliefs dating to ancient times. Breaking a looking glass foreshadows a broken compass. a sneeze must be greeted to the left or misfortune follows. Women aboard bring squalls, and St Elmo's fire signals storms. Corpus Crist lights, nicknamed corpogants, are seen as souls of departed seamen presaging disaster.
A guest praises a pretty array of doilies while Willie notes his mother’s rule about keeping the clean tablecloth intact after a prior mess. The exchange reveals a domestic scene emphasizing hygiene and manners.
A light dialogue from the Statesman features Patience asking Patrice about a baseball game. Patrice confirms a close score with one side at two runs and the other at one. When asked which team won she admits she did not ascertain if the home team or visitors won.
Society notes joke about a wedding where the horse columnist reports the event but omits the groom’s name as he finished among those who also ran. The editor notes the omission with a wink.
An arch aeologist notes the paradox of Pompeii’s lack of foresight while discussing its researches. Kidder counters that Pompeii could not foresee what lay before it given the misplacement of its letters.
A traveler asks about a garage for an automobile tour of Missouri. A local replies that no garage exists here but suggests visiting the drug store to ask the red-headed clerk for a baby rattle to approximate what he seeks.
Catholic Standard and Times reports a family naming their baby Aloysius Patrick by mistake. The remark from Mrs Hanagan My and Mrs Flanagan notes the amusing initials A P tied to the child’s name. A lighthearted churchly hometown moment sparked chatter among neighbors.
A dialogue exposes an offer of $1,000 to an inexperienced ward heeler for influence. Senator Sorghum challenges the vote buying, while the responder defends it as not political corruption but frenzied finance. The exchange highlights ethical tensions in political finance.
A brief joke lines exchange about a sick man needing mud baths and the idea of entering politics so the mud comes to him. The quip contrasts medical cure with political strategy and social irony.
In a witty exchange, Cholly rebuts that excessive smoking supposedly weakens intellect and replies that his own intellect remains just as it has always been. The banter playfully twists the idea of smoking affecting mind power.
Mrs Ascum questions why Mrs Wise buys costly items for her husband though funds are tight. Mrs Wise says she does it to please him and notes he enjoys bragging to his own people and playing the martyr.
Miss Jones How asks Mr de Brush why the subject came to him. The eccentric artist reveals he has had it in mind for years and recalls the papers describing it as full of atmosphere and suggesting space.
A struggling author laments inability to find a publisher while a sharp critic counters that if the critic were published, the author would share in the pains of writing. The exchange turns on mutual pain and irony rather than publication outcomes.
In a brief column the Detroit Free Press recalls a man who never faced disappointment by never seeking anything but trouble. The anecdote highlights the paradox of contentment through avoidance of pursuit.
The promoter boasts enormous mineral deposits and asks for funding. Col Stillwell counters with a quip about a neighbor who believed he had a mint bed and a spring, suggesting overoptimistic schemes.
A reader quotes a humorous exchange about farming feats in California. The Bravest Boarder asks if Burbank can produce canless peas or unupreserved tomatoes, while Farmer Skinner remarks on summer boarders and reading about wonders in growing strange vegetables.
A sun-baked region ponders train departure times as locals debate the next leaving engine. A sweltering stranger, Ilkali Tke-Waal, voices opinions while those who know assert the schedule hikes out just after the engine.
In a derailed courtroom scene the judge confronts an accused man who minimizes the beating as necessary to force work. The exchange centers on character insults and a harsh judgment about competence, reflecting a dramatic legal confrontation.
A dialogue scene presents two lawyers debating Johnston’s defense. The first asks if they will defend Jimmison, the second denies citing an weak case. The exchange reveals a belief in the case’s infeasibility.
In a wry exchange a contemplative speaker notes that some industry aids happiness while restraint proves the value of ease. A playful remark about never working to know rest highlights the contrast between toil and leisure.
A caustic critic declares Hamlet perfectly sane. Stormington Barnes agrees yet doubts some actors can properly portray the role noting their confidence contrasts with performance. The exchange frames a lively theater critique.
Mrs Clubhouse notes Mrs Upperton looks thin and worried lately while Mrs Strongmind quips she suspects she is roosterpecked. The dialogue hints at social tensions and gossip within their circle, with a sharp exchange revealing concerns about reputation.
Woman cites her husband’s drunkenness and a Keeley cure as the only solution, while a divorce is proposed as the ultimate remedy. The remark underscores marital strain and calls for radical treatment.
A wry reflection contrasts the certainty of success from steady effort with the awkward moment of removing sticky fly paper after sitting on it, illustrating humor in everyday mishaps.
A brief quote from Puck captures a rural sentiment about a picnic leave no one to share events with at home. The line reflects social expectations and personal disappointment in a humorous, informal voice.
Knox urges restraint while Kandor defends blunt speech in a terse exchange about tone and bluntness. The dialogue centers on how forceful language should be in social or journalistic discourse.
A bustling morning at a local restaurant featured a brief exchange about exotic dishes. A young waiter asked a guest if they served calf brains while a waitress dismissed the remark with disbelief, prompting light chatter among patrons.
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