Wit's End: Son Chooses College With Humorous Misdirection
A humorous essay recounts a parent's frustration as her son narrows college options from Harvard, Duke, and Dartmouth to a spoofed choice that offers no standards, minimal curriculum, and even a bumper-sticker slogan. The narrative lampoons college selection pressure and overachiever culture with satirical catalogues and exaggerated campus names.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Secretary of State
Eloy
Harvard
Yate
Duke
Dartmouth
Ohio State
Missouri
Colorado
Tulane
San Diego
Alpha Frisbee College
Eddie
Business School
Moline
Guam School of ‘Technology
Haw
Hikean
LBCC Offers Home Economics Classes in Gardening and Decor
Long Beach City College announces two Home Economics Department courses this week. Housing and Interiors LS A focuses on organic gardening and landscaping with practical plant selection and water conservation. Interior decorating courses cover gold leafing decoupage flowers and table accessories at Lakewood and Millikan extension campuses.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Long Beach City College
Pacific Coast
Liberal Arts
Carson St
Takewood Extension
Bevercrest Ave
Lakewood Extension
Millikan Extension
Snowden Ave
Tactics and timing in a bridge endgame counterplay
Bridge notes discuss changing tactics in modern play, analyzing a dummy spade king, avoiding spade queen traps, and the need to develop clubs while keeping East off lead. The writer suggests crossing to hearts after winning dummy’s king to establish clubs, with West decision points guiding whether to duck or cash the king. The piece notes how precise layout dictates optimal defense and the importance of avoiding overconcentration on a single line.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Declarer
West
Declare
Clarer
Dear Abby Telephone Advice Rejected by Readers
Dear Abby letters discuss privacy and methods to avoid disturbances by telephone or doorbell. A Texan reader questions practicality of turning off the phone or lights, arguing local constraints may limit such measures.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Abigail van Buren
Abby
Calce
Likes
Ma Bell
Orange
Texas
Pacific Telephone Company
Tam
Stop smoking class opens The Decision is Yours program
A nine week stop smoking program begins with twice weekly sessions tonight and Thursday at Wilson High School Adult Center Long Beach. Classes in Room 27 are sponsored by Long Beach Unified School District and the American Cancer Society. Enrollment cards available at the adult office.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Wilson High School Adult Center
Park Ave
Long Beach
Wilson
Long Beach Unified
Also Mentioned on This Page
Wit's End
Son
Erma Bombeck
LBCC
Los Angeles Ballet
John Anson Ford
St. Cyprian Church
Clark Ave
Guild
St. Anne’s Church
10Th St. Seal Beach
Altar and Rosary Society
Rod and Gun Club
Bellflower Aerie
Fraternal Order of Eagles
Eagle Lodge
Cedar Ave
Bellflower
Jenson Sisters
Eckenkar
Griswold
Raymond A
Rhe
Napoleon
East
Wrst East
aAlou As
Atlais
Corn South
North
Dear Abby
Stop
Biase
Ime
Ant
Jody
Peter Cum
STE
Sun
E. Broadway
L.B. Ph
Bruce Mulhearn
Bell
Flower
West Covina
Tira
Roger
W. Sonsel Ave
Weal Cavina
Eni Iit Gal
Reoienies
South Beach
Lincoln Avenue
Corie Moan
Harbor Blvd
Harbor Center
Nla
Ventura Blvd
Balboa
Main Street
Main St
Beach
Avantic
Carson
Weley
DeSoto Ave
Nordhoft
al No
Pact Katelia Ave
Tustin Ave
Ethminster
Westminster Ave
Westminster Center
Hollywood
LaBrea Ave
Safa Medical Center
Fah
Sion ‘Eas
This is just the beginning! Our collection holds over 300 years of history, including rare newspapers, obituaries, marriage records, birth records, and so much more—most of which you won’t find anywhere else!