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Newspaper
Patoka Register
Location
Patoka, Illinois, United States of America
Date
Mar 23, 1951
Page
6
Jondy Briggs arrived home at two in the morning just as the clock chimed two. He had been celebrating an expected addition to his family and learned he had twins. He quipped that it was lucky he didn’t stay out until four.
A quirky collection of jokes and quotes features lines about hair loss memory lapses and formal attire at a fraternity dance. The piece includes a stout lady claiming excellent memory yet forgetting three things and a teacher promising to illustrate her mind by erasing the board.
The professor says he was pickpocketed but believed the hand in his pocket belonged to him. A police sergeant questions how he did not feel the touch, and the professor insists it was a misperception of his own hand.
A farmer describes potato bugs and corn borers harming crops to a city woman who then laments dairy folk troubled by butterflies. The exchange highlights agricultural pests across crops and livestock in a rural discussion.
The doctor met Mrs. O'Hoolihan at the door to discuss her husband. She says she checked his temperature with a barometer read Very Dry. She rushed out to buy a barrel of beer and reports he has returned to work today.
An elderly observer laments eel suffering while watching a fisherman skin eels. The fisherman quips that twenty years ago he felt pain, but now believes the eels are accustomed to the process.
A humorous note explains the origin of incom patibility. ItPlayfully imagines a husband losing income prompts a wife to lose patibility, a pun linking income to compatibility in marriage.
A passenger observes a parachutist drifting past a window and offers to join, but the parachutist reveals he is the pilot. The passenger declines and remains in place as the parachutist acknowledges the choice.
An old man on a store porch greets two strangers in a shiny car who ask how long the town has been dead. The old man, peering over his spectacles, calls them buzzards, saying they are the first he has seen.
Describes a stylish dress for young girls in crisp striped fabric with a white collar edged in narrow ruffles. Features edge pockets trimmed with ruffles.
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