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Newspaper
Paris Post
Location
Paris, Idaho, United States of America
Date
Dec 20, 1912
Page
6
A collage of quirky lines asks about feminine forms, suits for damages, artful banknotes, and the vigor of facts. It ponders a Texan suing for a toe loss, garlic as tuberculosis cure, ruined hair trends, and hygienic marriages while noting autopsies, hens laying millions of eggs, and distant heart-beat registration.
A King George figure uses a typewriter and comments on two key hits. A man recalls a missing theft tied to a $1,000 bill number. A London physician links veils to wet noses, while some women wear them for red noses. A Boston man claims poetry blends stomach with brain, suggesting ideas adjust with food.
After 1500 years of continuous printing the paper stops issuing new editions. The move prompts reflection on the enduring humor found within its historic pages and the origins of many jokes.
In New York subways and theaters proprietors along the great white way reserve tables for men only likely occupied by members of the Ailmony club.
The article claims Maxim argues perfumes make many people fit and should be prohibited by law. It suggests someone using perfume could be pinched as a common nuisance.
Christmas Island, once famed as Treasure Island, is sold and reported to produce copra rather than pirates, skeletons, or buried treasure, shifting the legendary image to a practical coconut trade.
A claimant notes that restored articles would fetch little at the pawnbroker, implying the sentimental value they carry far exceeds monetary worth. The remark frames a discussion on the burglar's actions and the victim's losses.
A beauty expert advises focusing on well-shaped shoulder blades and avoiding protruding posture while noting many people cannot attend evening events where a decollete look is required. The guidance emphasizes practical style choices for everyday wear and confidence.
Fashion experts predict a shift toward ultra thin hairstyles and minimal headwear with elongated hatpins becoming obsolete as women move away from rats and puffs for a plainer, lower profile look.
A German writer proposes sending missionaries to teach people how to make love, sparking debate over morality and public role. Critics challenge the notion of such a campaign as inappropriate and at odds with social norms.
A New York college professor intends a lengthy walk to Chicago likely to delay arrival as long as possible. The journey appears to be a personal project rather than a required trip.
A fragment recounts Dakotah Bub who has trekked 25 000 miles and aimed for winter in Porto Rico but was badly injured by an automobile. It recalls Tecalis, a veteran who endured 100 battles and then died after a mule incident.
Nyack court hears four youths arraigned on burglary charges in a daylight yacht theft case. A gasoline yacht named the Lounger II, belonging to James Hammond, was seized then jammed by a hidden cable, with alleged loot valued in the thousands. Other suspects include Lehman and Romano.
A historical note explains the crescent’s origins as a Byzantine emblem later adopted by Turks after Constantinople’s fall in 1453. It connects the symbol to Vienna roll lore from the 16th century when Vienna’s bakeshops under fortifications were alarmed by Turkish mining, shaping bread to honor the event.
In Milford Connecticut a widow Mrs Alice Devine killed herself beside the grave of Horace Devine after note found addressed to undertaker H I Nettleton. The couple had a troubled history with Devine saying she lived in New York hotels and had no permanent home. Medical examiner John Tves investigates her relatives in New York and Milford while Nettleton buried her at his expense.
A son in law recalls the burden of supporting his wife and her parents after his in laws move into his home. He laments the old man’s demand for financial support and jokes about the futility of buying hats and clothes to please his wife.
In Council Grove, Kansas, Mrs. Joseph Rutledge killed herself after despondency over not finding 3000 dollars rumored buried in an iron pot on their farm. Her husband had hidden all savings and died last February before disclosing the cache.
A juror with a conflict is excused after a judge notes the question about influence is foolish. The exchange reveals a spouse seated on the jury and the DA indicates a close relation, while the judge disallows further inquiry.
A Punch style note from an Alpine resort records cheerful exchange as visitors recount a splendid day on the mountain. A speaker compliments English mothers and mentions his daughters climbing, with a playful remark about vernacular ascent.
New Orleans rat catchers, still battling bubonic plague fears, trap a four foot alligator in a spring device along the riverfront. The creature likely escaped from shallow waters beneath the wharves.
In a light domestic exchange a doctor warns a husband to avoid exciting reading after heart concerns. A store clerk recommends a calm book titled Elsie's School Days as a safe choice for his recovery.
A man named Thomas Roach was found inside a barrel rolling along Kent Avenue near South Tenth Street. Nails in the barrel snagged his clothes and flesh as bystanders helped roll him. police and a barber eventually freed him and he was taken to hospital for care.
A Porto Rican mother Mrs Juan Cavalho was shot in the abdomen by her brother in law named Ricas during a dispute. The baby was born in twenty hours with an embedded bullet in the side but both mother and child are not in immediate danger. The assailant is jailed on attempted murder charges and could face first degree murder if the infant dies.
In a humorous exchange Mrs Henpeck quips about the world being a stage while Mr Henpeck laments some men act as stage managers. The dialogue showcases marital ribbing and theatrical metaphor.
This morning reports mention two doctors and patients including a beekeeper and a widow with hay fever. The fragment hints at occupational illness observations but lacks full details on identities or outcomes.
A humorous exchange unfolds with a joke about a tough omelet during a courtroom scene. The bride and judge humorously debate egg quality and the "egg-coat" used to cook it, highlighting light dialogue amid proceedings.
The passage interprets a hero’s vow to a heroine that his love will endure despite darkness cold storm and despair, even after they marry. It frames love as constant and steadfast beyond hardship.
In a dramatic courtroom exchange the prosecutor questions a witness about how long the defendant stayed in a house. The witness struggles to quantify time, admits giving an opinion rather than fact, and the judge orders a 1:30 adjournment with jurors warned not to discuss testimony.
First Musician-What’s the matter with him The second musician reports the soloist had typhoid fever and his head was shaved.
The speaker recalls his wife’s optimism about their baby’s future. She told him yesterday that the child resembles him yet believes the baby will outgrow any current traits.
A primary student named Max was asked to write a sentence containing the word chicken. He wrote T jiken as a small hen I can spell hen. The incident prompted a spelling lesson.
In a conversation the two Romans debate Cincinnatus and farming interests. One asks about a discovery beside a plow and the other confirms. The exchange hints at agricultural influence and alliances with the harvester trust.
A fragmented quote from a senator sparks discussion about carefulness in public remarks. The exchange highlights tension between precision and spontaneity in political speech.
In a curious local vignette a prominent town stationer is described as seedy and blamed for watching every arriving train. The exchange paints a quirky portrait of a colorful small community figure and his railwatching habit.
Fragmentary dialogue shows a couple's tense late night talk. One accuses the other of problematic rhetoric while acknowledging wakefulness and implied abuse. The snapshot reflects a strained domestic moment captured in minimal lines.
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