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This newspaper page contains 24 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
New Oxford Item
Location
New Oxford, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Date
Jun 01, 1916
Page
20
Lancashire mother Mrs Podger has several sons at the front and recalls Saloniki in a wry exchange. She jokes that St Paul may have written to the Thessalonians but adds she sent parcels for her son months ago that have not arrived.
Cure itching burning and disfigurement with Cuticura Soap and Ointment. Relief is immediate and often complete and permanent. Free sample by mail with a booklet sent to Cuticura Dept. L Boston. Sold everywhere.
A joke suggests the Thompsons keep their maid by not paying her wages, as she remains with them nearly a year and cannot return to town because she would have to walk.
The Knocker comments on Tompking who has wandered the globe and continues to knock at every thing he encounters in life. The exchange hints at Tompking’s restless nature and broad travels.
A humorous comparison places the challenge of earning a million dollars alongside the difficulty of calming a crying infant. The line suggests money seems simple next to parenting struggles and sleepless nights.
In Bishopsville a reclusive doctor cared for banker’s daughter Mary and wins the banker’s regard. Rumors spread after a dinner incident revealing a past medical joke: Haynes once blinded a patient’s eye in New York. The banker exposes the truth, correcting the record, and Haynes and Gladys find happiness.
Daddy narrates a whimsical dinner hosted by Mrs White Duck for Fairies and fashionable ducks. The table features pond lily leaves and moss stools, with wild cherry blossoms as decoration. A Fairy Queen performs a color changing dress dance while a peacock couple draws envy from the guests.
A tall green red and blue woman visits a San Francisco bank to identify Henry Smyth now a cashier. She recalls their youth and past affections while the cashiere, Salindy Spratt, claims the resemblance and demands identification, leading to a tense moment.
In an Indiana village a visitor attends a church service and stays for a board meeting. The minister assumes a misunderstanding but the stranger explains he has endured the talk for an hour and asks who was more bored.
A schoolmaster asks students to explain the suffix stan meaning place of. Johnny Snaggs volunteers Umbrellastan the place for umbrellas, eliciting a lighthearted moment in the classroom. The anecdote highlights his quick wit and mischievous charm as Tit-Bits records the gag.
Dorothy asks mother if she has a little sewing machine under her hair, recalling the phrase her mother used to describe her busy brain. The exchange shows playful family humor and childlike curiosity in a domestic moment.
Letters from North Crandon Lawton and Roxbury praise Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound for relief from displacement inflammation and fatigue. Women report improved health after using the remedy and recommend it to others. The ad notes confidential female readers answers from Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine Co. in Lynn Massachusetts. A dining room motto prompts a joke about daily bread.
A Washington druggist cites selling 8600 bottles of Elixir Babelks for malaria chills and fever in five months. He quotes customer praise and notes the product costs 50 cents, available at druggists or by prepaid parcel post from Kloczewski & Co.
In a playful exchange a father explains to his son that dietetics is a new science of dyes, while the boy asks for clarification and his father suggests asking someone older for a harder question.
A heated reaction follows a strict neutrality stance as fans and players criticize the umpire. The quote frames neutrality as a logical outcome that stirs debate among observers.
A sensitive horse near Sixth and Spring streets in Los Angeles attacked Edgar Akers aged twenty five when he smoked a cigarette. The horse clenched his right hand tearing flesh before Akers freed his hand. The incident occurred at the curb by the animal.
A wry remark plays on Perkins ability to support his wife yet claims she is insupportable, highlighting a clever paradox about domestic support and phrasing.
An advertisement from the Ir. Kline Company of Red Bank New Jersey promotes a patent epilepsy medicine with promises of rapid relief after fifty years of uninterrupted use. The jumbled text implies the product name fits in with medical patent rhetoric and emphasizes effectiveness.
The article notes thimbles as a popular jewelry item for women, reflecting a bygone fashion era where practical craft tools doubled as decorative accessories. It mentions their role in daily wear and social display within the period's style norms.
A newspaper blurb credits Dr Pierce of the Iavalids Motel and Surgical Institute with proving Anuric a superior uric acid solvent. It claims Anuric swiftly relieves inflammation symptoms from uric acid issues, with a suggested use of hot water before meals and a 50 cent package. An advert-like ending notes a joke about a doctor’s bill.
In Detroit a wife left her husband over his wig. The husband scoffs claiming the issue was simply a bald ex. The remark reflects a domestic dispute playfully framed around appearance.
A compact line suggests a man defers to his wife for opinion, signaling domestic influence shaping public stance. The phrase implies shared voice or reliance on his spouse rather than personal opinion.
In the case at hand a surgeon reports locating a ball encysted in a patient's shoulder after previous remarks. The patient confirms insisting on the procedure.
Residents of Suma show a strong craze for assembling marriage certificates as a personal hobby and social statement. The trend reflects local interest in family history and civic record keeping.
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