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This newspaper page contains 16 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Myrtle Point Enterprise
Location
Myrtle Point, Oregon, United States of America
Date
May 21, 1909
Page
3
Richard Jester notes fear around a magazine explosion with questions about timing. He asks when it happened, and the reply points to March and to the Out look in Chicago.
PAZO Ointment guarantees cure for itching bleeding or protruding piles in six to fourteen days or money refunded. Includes price 650c.
Dialogue contrasts a foreigner misnaming a primary with a native explanation. The piece notes a smiling teething remedy Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup as a remembered child aid.
The head waiter raged at the banquet over pay. He noted a speaker earned 850 for half an hour of talk while he received only 6.95 dollars, mostly in nickels.
This old advertisement promotes Allen's Foot-Ease a cure for hot sweating callus and swollen feet. Sold by all druggists for 25 cents with a trial package offered free and a bold claim from Allen Olmsted Le Roy New York.
The Chicago Tribune recalls St Patrick driving snakes from Ireland and warns reporters against pature taking, but the warning goes unheeded as the story is rushed to print.
Wit notes a duel from Monsieur Renzier Corciere’s book Sur Le Pre. Prince Pierre Bonaparte and Monsieur de la Valette fired pistols. La Valette missed, Pierre hit high in the belt but bullet flattened by a five franc piece. The prince urged friendship and mocked the adversary’s money. Naval obsessions and patent nostrums follow.
Uncle Jerry Peebles quips that life insurance companies impose rules to lengthen lives by fifteen years, and declares he will ignore them. He says the life insurance industry already has a good thing.
An old advertisement touts Bromo Quinine as the sole laxative cure all. It cites global use to cure a cold in one day and mentions a price of 25 cents, with signature by E. W. Grove.
A Dun dee Advertiser snippet notes Tawson has married again and mentions the speaker's affection and gifts given. It preserves a local, informal tone with brief social detail.
Howard Bros. of Buffalo New York sold Pettit's Eye Salve to treat weak eyes, advertised as a wonderful remedy with strong early sales growth after its 1807 introduction.
A witty exchange shows a Doctor asking about political economy and a Professor admitting he knows only enough to avoid politics. The quip highlights skepticism about expertise and the practical limits of scholarly knowledge.
Distemper cured in horses and dogs using Spahn's Distemper Cure. Guarantee on every bottle. Over 500,000 bottles sold last year. Available in .50 and 1.00. Agents wanted and free book offered. Spahn Medical Company Goshen Indiana.
In a brisk street exchange a chronic calamity caller grips a man and warns of danger while the other tone downplays the threat and exits with a polite greeting. The moment captures a split reaction to looming concerns.
The article notes Florida spans large land areas with diverse crops from northern corn and peaches to central citrus and tropical fruits, with Sanford yards filled with oranges and grapefruits and peach orchards blooming in January February. Mulberries ripen in March and inspire poetic reflections on pies and fruit abundance.
A collage of humor quotes from Boston Transcript and other papers. The items feature quips on marriage salaries heiresses and politics, light wordplay, witty exchanges, and accidental misunderstandings. Names include Mrs Peck, Mr Cane, Miss Lofte, and Mrs Torkins among others.
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