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This newspaper page contains 24 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Myrtle Point Enterprise
Location
Myrtle Point, Oregon, United States of America
Date
Jun 12, 1908
Page
7
All Humors are impure matters which the skin liver kidneys and other organs cannot take care of without help. Pimples boils eczema eruptions loss of appetite thatched feeling bilious turns fits of indigestion dull headaches and many other troubles are due to them. They are removed by.
A discussion in a historical paper contrasts an investor arguing against buying a trolley line as it merely feeds the system. The railway magnate replies that they should control their own feeding strategy.
An undersized reporter pressed into a crowd asking if trouble had started. A tall man replied that two disturbers had begun the clash but no blows had landed yet. The scene described comes from a Chicago Tribune account.
Uncle Jerry Peebles grouses over a new onion lacking aroma. He jokes that he eats onions for their smell, expressing disappointment at the flavorless invention.
A humorous note recalls Gruet the life insurance agent who marries a woman with substantial policies. The joke hinges on him learning after marriage that he must cover the premiums on her life insurance. The anecdote highlights fate’s irony in a domestic twist.
A fragmented excerpt discusses prison labor, inmate trades, and a teething remedy adrow in a Chicago Tribune clipping. It mentions a convulsions worry in Wisconsin and a cook potentially leaving after packing. The text mixes dialog and stray commentary without coherent narrative.
A sobbing widow returns from her husband’s funeral and a neighbor consoles her saying it is for the best and that he rests in peace at last. The brief sketch conveys grief and sympathy in a newspaper voice.
An advertisement extols S S S as the best vegetable blood purifier and tonic to cure malaria. It links impurities in blood to symptoms like pale complexion, fatigue, chills, and boils, claiming the remedy cleanses the circulation and restores health. It offers free medical information from The Swift Specific Co., Atlanta, GA.
Amory Mississippi resident R COWLEY reports severe malaria during 1900 while farming on the Mississippi. After trying multiple blood purifiers and chill cures, they claim S S S restored health, noting no chills or malaria symptoms since.
An advertisement from Leadville Colorado lists prices for gold silver lead copper and cyanide tests and tailing envelopes. It references the Carbonate National Bank and notes control and time work collected with a full price list available on request.
A teacher asks for attendance in cold weather and a big boy suggests moving the schoolhouse over the lake to give students skates instead of pencils. The exchange shows humorous schoolyard wit and community quirks.
Gotham asks if the proposal will include the words family entrance as the public service commission recommends side doors on railroad cars noted by the Yonkers Statesman.
A quip contrasts gas meters and money, arguing against the existence of a gas meter and, more broadly, of money, in a satirical exchange. The dialogue highlights skepticism about measurement and currency as a social joke.
A comic exchange unfolds about marriage, divorce, and a financial twist as a partner’s assignment yields a neat sum to a preferred creditor. An abrupt medical sales pitch for Dr Kline’s remedies interrupts the dialogue.
A Tennessee congressman Nathan Hale quotes a constituent asking for Congress rules. He sends a photograph of Joe Cannon by return mail, implying the reply is pointed. A Washington Star quote notes a speaker’s measured response to flattery about a speech.
A Houston exchange quotes Mrs Howard Gould seeking a bill of $3,680 for her husband as necessaries of life including a $700 skirt while disputes over daughter music lessons surface. The piece notes Persia’s Peacock Throne priced at ten to fifteen million dollars as the era’s extravagance.
Allen S Olmsted of Le Roy New York offers a free sample of Allen's Foot Ease claiming relief for eaten, hot swollen and aching feet. The ad asserts shoe comfort, corn cure and bunion relief and notes drugs stores carry it for 25 cents with a warning against substitutes.
English Joan and Pat are two friendly workmen who constantly tilt at each other. John asks how many shirts fit in a yard and Pat replies it depends on whose yard you get into in a punny exchange.
A dialogue scene shows a mother and daughter debating marriage to Mr De Sénadds. The mother recalls her own husband's similar control while the daughter notes the suitor’s odd ideas of a wife. The exchange hints at evolving views on marriage and independence.
Side Lights on mythology reports Vulcan remarking a four shoe job on a centaur. He notes the creature stood still while flies were brushed away and jokes about a discount price. He invites the customer to visit his shop for future work.
Dialogue humorously contrasts official assessor figures with private estimates. Diggis explains a rough method: take the assessor figure, add the amount a man tells friends, then halve the total to approximate true income.
The ad touts Hall's Catarrh Cure as the only positive cure for catarrh a constitutional disease. It claims internal action through the blood and mucous surfaces to destroy the disease's foundation and strengthen the patient. Proponents offer 100 dollars if it fails to cure and promote testimonials from F J Cheney & Co Toledo Ohio. Also promotes Hall's Family Pills for constipation.
A London Mail item reports a Rustien-Old fellow relocating after a rough move. A van driver damaged £5 of furniture, a five pound note vanished, the gas company demanded double deposit, and the speaker was summoned for jury duty.
In a brief Detroit Free Press item a resident laments Mrs Brigham leaving the city. The neighbor notes her striking flat silver set, which they often borrowed for entertaining guests, reflecting local social ties.
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