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Newspaper
Moulton Eagle
Location
Moulton, Texas, United States of America
Date
Dec 02, 1904
Page
4
A quirky report claims Wet Mair and Nails measure seven years as the average, features a beard 25 feet long a haif feet long and nails 3 feet long, suggesting an odd folk tale or exaggerated measurement from a distant era.
Quail hunting is halted in France and Germany amid soaring scarcity. The remington typewriter dominates the market with record sales and social prestige. A witty quip contrasts a scandalmonger with an entertaining talker in social satire.
Southern Pacific offers return holiday tickets December 20 21 22 and 26 1904 with 30 day limit plus 2. Open window route recommended. For Christmas travel contact local agent or T J Anderson G P A or Jos Hellen A G P A Houston Texas. Britain’s mineral water industry capital approaches £15000000.
A reader notes Hunt's Lightning Oil stands apart from hundreds of similar products. The oil eases aches and pains and other injuries when applied, while an eminent surgeon reportedly relaxes nerves by golf before major operations.
An advertisement from Arbuckle Goodes Commission Company promotes nine associated mining firms forming an Investors' Guarantee Association with five million dollars capital. It invites readers to write for prospectus and details about guaranteed protection against loss. Also mentions Chemulpho, port of Seoul, Korea, and its large tidal bay.
A Camden New Jersey reader recommends Allen's Foot-Ease to relieve burning itching and discomfort of feet. The ad states the product cures foot problems and is sold by all druggists for 25 cents.
A dated list of thirteen and more moral maxims advising men to favor kindness, respect, attention, and generosity toward wives. It stresses emotional investment, avoiding nagging, validating a wife’s importance, and maintaining vigilance to sustain affection.
A New Haven freight agent recalls a Central Vermont crossing blockade tale with a diminutive superintendent and a brash brakeman. The column also notes a Madrid pigeon shoot where King Alfonso loses to Senor Rivero, who sends a prized horse as a gift and receives a royal horse in return. It ends with a patriotic verse by Charles Dibdin.
Mrs Wonder ponders the difference between a guesser and a forecaster. He explains that a guesser lumps figures and is right or wrong instantly, while a forecaster arranges data in statistics and makes you wonder how he could be anything but right.
An article promotes Dr Williams Pink Pills for rheumatism and other ailments, touting rapid cures and safety. It cites Mrs. Margaret Gantz of Burlington as a testimonial and lists other conditions allegedly treated. It also endorses Defiance Cold Water Starch and notes Japan's ancient sake history.
A collage of medical ads and notices claims deafness can be cured only by constitutional remedies, with various tonics and pills marketed. Other items tout Simmon’s cough syrup, Defiance Starch, Cheatham’s Laxative Tablets, Piso’s Cure, and a Dentwise detective agency, plus piecemeal quips on marriage, wealth, and insurance.
A man and woman overhear a feigning distressed woman begging for a nickel to ride to Brooklyn. The pair realize it’s a common hustle, noting many pretend travelers seek Harlem or downtown money, but this is the first Brooklyn angle they’ve seen.
At Highland Park in I, a few ancient bent trees still mark the old Pottawattamie trail. One theory holds they pointed toward Lake Michigan while another suggests they signaled the mound of the council fire.
In a lecture on Personal and Domestic Hygiene J Caullie FRS stated that kilts are the healthy form of attire for boys. He claimed Scottish highlanders show boys in kilts grow strong and become fine men.
A nature-study museum in a former mortuary at St. George's in the East houses a honeycomb with twenty pounds of honey produced mainly from sugar cargoes in the docks by a bee colony of 7,000. A Jersey Central fireman fell off a locomotive to knock a man from the track as the engine neared. Trespassing on railroad tracks is to be sternly suppressed. In tobacco factories in France, 17,148 workers are employed by the state, 15,700 of them women, with 714 directors and supervisors.
The London Queen decides a bride becomes a wife six weeks after the wedding. The piece contrasts with a stereotype about the Indian never forgiving, noting he may speak to an enemy but dies with lasting hatred.
Londoners enjoy fifty three theaters and forty three music halls. Birmingham school authorities teach cooking and shopping economi cally to children. Mother Grays Sweet Powders for Children claim cure for constipation fevers stomach disorders teething issues moves bows and worms with 30 000 testimonials. Available at druggists 25c free sample. Address A S Olmsted LeRoy New York. Sometimes a woman speaks differently to family and callers.
A mock historical boast claims Hunt's Cure will cure any itching trouble of the skin with 60 cents per box. The ad adds a flippant line about brains and beauty, suggesting women gain both.
An antiquated ad copy touts Defiance Starch claiming larger 16 oz packages and cheaper price than 12 oz brands. It also promotes a guaranteed cure for piles with a druggist refund offer. The piece ends with a humorous query about molasses on dried apples.
A reflective aphorism notes that many fail by deceiving others and that true worth shows in actions, not appearance. It presents a warning that convincing a plain woman of charm without merit is hollow and self-defeating.
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