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Newspaper
Monticello Express
Location
Monticello, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jan 19, 1899
Page
8
A historical notice proclaims that doctors cannot cure contagious blood poison and asserts that only 8 8 8 can reach the disease’s cause and drive it from the body.
The New York Sun recounts General Grant and General Sheridan in Cuba with their entourage touring Key West and Havana. A cigars swap leads to Grants collapse after Sheridan lights his. Grant recovers atop Morro castle and resumes smoking while the anecdote ends with a joke about bargains from the Chicago Record.
Real estate notice advertising a 154 acre farm for rent near Langworthy Iowa. Inquiry directed to 2411 P. H. Sherman Rolfe Iowa. Mentions Dr. A. Fackler editor of the Micanopy Hustler and his family as recipients. Includes brief testimonial for One Minute Cough Cure claiming relief from la grippe and after effects.
A London Truth excerpt debates con artists who lure African millionaires into social traps using supposed investments. It contrasts cruel social currency schemes with genuine friendship, recounting Barnato’s rumored dinner quip and a comic rabbit tale from Outing, then ends with a San Francisco Argonaut anecdote about a drinker choosing blindness to save money.
Advert declares Elec tric Bitters as the only remedy for a bad cold and liver disorder with symptoms of exhaustion. It guarantees a cure or money back and markets at D. C. Prader & Co. drug store for 50 cents per bottle.
A Monticello Iowa post office list shows unclaimed letters June 16 1899 including Lizzy Shane Marguerite Matsers P H Ryan Pressa Jangene D E Pono and P M Horrible agony relief and cures promoted by DeWitts Witch Hazel salve One Minute Cough Cure and Dewitt Little Early Risers appear among cautions and promotional notices from D C Prader Co Also notes on population growth European nations and a Nile tributary line conclude the clipping with health and weather insights.
Bucklen’s Arnica Salve touted as best for cuts bruises sores ulcers and skin eruptions. Claims guaranteed satisfaction or money refunded with price 25 cents per box. For sale by D. C. Prader & Co.
Promotional pitch for a Dubuque Iowa reader to undertake an extensive Mexico itinerary. Describes Mexico’s antiquities, Toltec Aztec contributions, Mexico City museums and pyramids, grand scenery with Popocatepetl, and a deluxe rail journey named a hotel on wheels.
The notice promises refunds for Green's Warranted Syrup of Tar if it fails to cure a cough or cold with a 60 cent bottle and a 25 cent bottle to prove satisfaction or money back. Signed by H. Sorry and A. Kenner. An unrelated anecdote notes a Chinaman sending three invitations per guest as a sign of impatience.
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