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Newspaper
Middletown Journal
Location
Middletown, Ohio, United States of America
Date
Jan 14, 1973
Page
5
A humorous promotional piece credits a Margaret Wills Speed Reading Course for rapid reading and writing, then parodies output rates and future programs. It mocks quick comprehension and lists outlandish claims while presenting a mock demonstration and sarcastic future offerings like speed writing and speed listening.
In a column, Peter Friedman argues the FDA’s contaminant limits are modest and industry has kept near those ceilings. He notes low insect fragments and rodent hairs in peanut butter and yogurt, mocks consumer hysteria, and jokes about collecting fragments to assemble insects.
A compact reflection on everyday noises that grate or intrude. The piece lists common sounds from a rolling quarter to a distant siren, a license read aloud, a doorbell after painting, and the jingle of a child’s thermos, ending with the recurring theme of a wife waking you.
On this date in history events include the 1784 U.S. peace treaty with England, ending the American Revolution, the 1809 alliance between England and Spain, the 1814 Norway cession to Sweden, the 1907 Jamaica earthquake, Ford’s first assembly line in 1914, the 1943 Casablanca wartime conference, Tito named president in 1953, de Gaulle’s 1963 opposition to Britain’s EEC entry, and blizzards isolating tourists in the Alps a decade ago and five years ago.
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