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This newspaper page contains 19 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Mesa Free Press
Location
Mesa, Arizona, United States of America
Date
Nov 11, 1898
Page
3
Farmers hold wheat at 82 a bushel fearing a drop to two dollars and losses loom if delayed actions persist. The notice warns against delays and suggests treatment for biliousness with Hostetter's Stomach Bitters.
A quotation notes a dentist who claims to be painless but jokes that the only pain came from his fees. The item reflects a humorous exchange in the Indianapolis Journal.
An old advertisement promises a one day cure for colds using Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. It guarantees a refund from all druggists if the remedy fails to cure.
A Lake Herald item notes actresses and ringers cannot be married to their art without divorcing from husbands. Classified blurbs promote Jesse Moore Whiskey and the Brooklyn Hotel in San Francisco with room rates. Health ads claim Dr Great Nerve Restorer for fits and nervous conditions and Piso’s Cure for Consumption cited by households.
An advertisement touts Hall's Catarrh Cure as a constitutional remedy that cures catarrh by treating the blood and mucous surfaces. It promises $100 to any case it fails to cure and invites readers to request testimonials from F. J. Cheney & Co. Toledo Ohio. Sold by druggists for 75 cents. Hall's Family Pills also advertised as best.
In Life In California Alfred Robinson recounts a prank by Senor Lugo who loaded a paper cigar with gunpowder and placed it among cigars. He aimed to trick a guest into smoking but the guest avoided it until late night when Lugo lit the cigar and a blast ruined his mustache and frightened his wife.
Mrs Grigsby and Orlando discuss a London Tit-Bits tale about a harmless lunatic who believes he is a grain of corn and fears a chicken will eat him. Grigsby adds a parallel about a woman who thinks she is cheese and flees a room to avoid a mouse.
A narrator recalls a joke heard during a lakeside visit at Killarney. Boatmen argued over tips and used profane language, which an echo repeated verbatim, provoking a mock scandal as a pious observer laments the echo’s mischief.
The quote notes General Ulysses S. Grant’s quip about Admiral Porter, praising him as potentially the greatest admiral since Nelson if Porter had not learned to write. It highlights Grant’s private regard for Porter and his humorous view on Porter’s penchant for publication.
A collage of jokes, quips, and humorous exchanges from period humor columns. Silly anecdotes feature miscommunications, social foibles, and punchlines about lovers, theft, politics, and boaters. Names, places, and magazines appear in rapid-fire gags.
The Fifty first congress entertained with a clash between General Spinola and Eli jah Adams Morse over a large collar. Morse attacked prohibition in army canteens while Spinola mocked his opponent. Spinola later boasted of a spotless collar and mocked Morse ears. The exchange sparked convulsions in the house and referenced Yorktown Hessians and Speaker Reed.
Ole Hanson, a Swedish resident, shot a bellicose Russian neighbor Havva Drenkovitskey’s dog after it showed aggression. In court he answered questions with a rugged sense of justice about his two hole double barrel shotgun and why he did not aim the other end, leaving the lawyer to weigh potential extenuating circumstances.
The city uses no drays or wagons. natives carry loads on their backs. A cargador can move a trunk two miles for 25 cents, while in the country heavy loads ride on mule backs. Droves of mules bring produce into town.
The article promotes St. Jacob's Oil as a cure for rheumatism with no aftereffect. It details three percent holdings returning funds to the Treasury and securing notes and public deposits, noting a large amount of supply circulating outside banks and that small holders own most of it and are reluctant to part with their cash.
Mrs. John Tansey of Detroit describes how her daughter recovered from a prolonged illness attributed to lack of blood. She credits Dr Williams Pink Pills for Pale People with restoring health after three months of treatment and urges other mothers to keep them for ailments linked to impoverished blood and weak nerves.
A narrator recalls being alone with a maniac in his cabin on a voyage. The assailant threatened to cut his throat with a knife before the door was locked. He pretended calm, found a way to escape as the door reopened with crew aid. He survived the siege and reflects on the tense moment.
September Santiago customs receipts reach beyond thirty thousand and may top one hundred thousand this month. Paris reports Faure says no England France settlement on Fashoda. Correa withdraws resignation amid national difficulties. Dreyfus case shows potential acquittal. Two American Protestant tract distributors arrested in Arequipe for anti state religion papers. release sought. Macedonia sundered by storms with heavy loss of life. A 400 person caravan, 100 drowned in the Galice. Insurgents retreat toward Americans preferred distance except in Galoocan. Sun notes peace commissioners’ stance leads Spanish commissioners to Madrid. Sagasta government to resign.
A night safety note warns against strong drafts while sleeping or neuralgia risk. A Colorado Midland railroad strike halts freight service east of division after crews refused a three engine train. About fifty workers participate. company hopes quick resolution.
Letters from women across the United States praise Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. Mrs Satta reports relief from back pain and fatigue after years of illness. Mrs Puiturrs says four bottles improved tiredness and headaches, restoring energy. Mrs Herrel cites recovery from weakness, bearing-down pains, and improved household work ability.
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