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This newspaper page contains 17 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Marshall Statesman
Location
Marshall, Michigan, United States of America
Date
Jul 19, 1889
Page
7
A Detroit Free Press piece presents a childlike monologue in heavy dialect, imagining life as a girl named Birdie. The voice recalls simple wants and chores, family, school, and rural fantasies, contrasting innocence with adult expectations and social pressure.
In a humorous tale from Camp Verla the aging Gen Harney, famed for dignity, forgets his handkerchief and orders a trio of runners to stop a running parade. He scolds the messengers, swears humorously, and finally returns to dignity as the dress parade nears.
The article notes the beds of Noyalty at Clarence House as famed for luxury. It highlights the tsarist lineage and a Russian grand duchess who prized flawless bedding, sewing down sheets to avoid any wrinkle. The piece cites royal-family chatter about her insistence on perfect domestic comfort.
The piece recalls imperial and royal bedchambers now seen as modest, noting Empress dowager Cr sat and visitors at St. Cloud Compiégne and the Tuileries. It also highlights Sarah Bernhardt’s bed nearly fifteen feet broad, where visitors rest on a vast couch that makes the performer resemble a golden bird in white satin.
In Gardner's Bay Montauk cattle keepers faced British forces under Admiral Hardy. Keeper Paine, using a canoe and rawhide, confronted the fleet to reclaim a slain cow. He seized an Indian, boarded the Admiral’s ship, and demanded payment, threatening to take cattle from the fleet. The Admiral praised Paine as the bravest Yankee seen. Paine won compensation in British gold and returned ashore victorious.
An elderly man from Illinois seeking his politician nephew Stephen B. Elkins arrives in New York with a gray beard and hopes to find him. A Philadelphia visitor helps him locate Elkins, who runs things for Elaine in 1864, and escorts him to his hotel for a joyful reunion near the president.
A jolly man laments hard times saying he cannot earn enough for a beach trip for his wife and children. The other replies with a rant about monthly earnings and household costs, noting he spent $25 on club dues and yachting expenses instead.
A Chicago Press Club member recalls a Kentucky editor Warren touring Plummerville to promote the Weekly Cob. Town laughter proves scarce as townsfolk glare and a rough day ends with a stubbornly quiet departure before trains.
The Worcester Spy excerpt extols Killarney as the world’s most beautiful spot. It praises water, forests, and mountains in endless forms, from deer-filled groves to mighty cascades, arguing the landscape inspires exalted perception and divine artistry.
Two teamsters collided in Wee Street in an incident described as mutual fault with both apologizing and bowing after clearing their carts. The exchange ends with good day wishes and no injuries noted, a curious street moment documented in local life.
A letter in the Omaha Bee denounces government policy toward Sioux Indians. It cites 1,200 residents at the Tower Brule agency, costing $150,000 yearly, and a 24,000,000 acre reservation with 23,000 Indians. The writer argues government provisions foster laziness and dependency, condemns assimilation, and shares anecdotes of Indians resisting self-sufficiency and misusing houses built for them.
An angry actor storms into the newspaper office after a performance, denounces critics as contemptible, claims cabbages and dead cats were thrown from the gallery, and a cowboy fired a hair with a pistol. He offers $10 to feature a column with full particulars and a bold scare headline.
The blockade of port commerce harms health and circulation, while Hostetter's Stomach Bitters is presented as a universal laxative and anti bilious remedy. The text asserts its sovereign efficacy for intermittent fevers and malarial liver purification, urging rheumatic neuralgia and kidney sufferers to use it for strength and recovery.
A mother punishes her crying daughter to teach the reason for punishment. The little girl explains Bridget would not let her go out to play, prompting the mother to ask why she was punished. The tale underscores whether such reasoning actually helps behavior.
The article condemns lung disease and praises Dr Pierce s Golden Medical Discovery as a guaranteed remedy sold by druggists with a money back guarantee if not effective. It warns against hoaxes and urges avoidance of quack cures while promoting Dr Sugo s Catarrh Remedy for nasal issues.
A readable old article extols potatoes as a staple and argues good cooking matters. It advises selecting uniform potatoes, washing thoroughly, boiling gently with salt, and draining steam briefly to avoid sogginess. It notes that poor cooking makes even fine potatoes dull and warns against rough handling of the skins.
A Burlington Free Press humor item collection includes a waiter anecdote about spillover at a Baptist anniversary banquet and a quip about turning up in village life. It also notes advice to write to I F Johnson & Co for guidance, a clothing joke about garters, a Dobbins Electric soap endorsement for washing, and a doctor quip about a miser’s death certificate.
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