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Newspaper
Lexington Intelligencer
Location
Lexington, Missouri, United States of America
Date
Dec 14, 1901
Page
7
A collage of quips and jokes from various papers shows humor about writing, poetry, ignorance, parenting, dogs, miscommunication, and everyday misunderstandings. Notable lines include a novelist’s effortless flow, a contrived exchange about a published poem, and light exchanges on discipline and civility.
A woman on a tram suspects a man sitting beside her of pickpocketing her purse after a strange series of moves. She grips his arm as he rises and claims he must be the thief. The man reveals his hand was never in her pocket, and the purse was in his coat pocket. A bystander identifies him as a reverend, leaving the lady embarrassed by the mistaken accusation.
Mrs Barnaby Alexander cleaned two rooms from ceiling to floor taking up carpets and doing the work herself. Although she had never been coached Mrs Andy Smack boasts of making ten gallons of tomato catsup in one morning. John Sandy and daughters did a week's ironing in two hours through coaching and teamwork. Luther Dickerson 77 has handled 80 cords of wood twice in two months.
An older advertisement extols the value of sewing machines for home happiness. The fragment highlights the need for Veime Lables and implies a promotional pitch for domestic sewing equipment and efficiency.
Trains arrive at North Lexington daily and depart on express daily main line services. Northbound and eastbound movements show regular schedules at Lexington Junction with through and local trains servicing the line.
Fragmented OCR item lists street names and railway mail lines, referencing St Louis, KC, Cal and Colimited, Algwinaville, East Hound, Lyons, and telephone numbers. The passage reads as a garbled description of mail routes and local connections with scattered place names. The readable content shows transit and mail references without a coherent narrative.
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