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Newspaper
Ismay Journal
Location
Ismay, Montana, United States of America
Date
Jul 12, 1912
Page
2
A collage of witty lines and aphorisms touching on fashion weather optimism marriage money crime science aviation pets and politics. The snippets poke at social norms and human foibles with sharp irony and playful misdirection.
A Philadelphia man died in a barbers chair while being shaved and the barber continued talking, with witnesses reporting the incident as it occurred. Police and medical responders investigated the scene, and authorities contacted the barbershop owner for a routine inquiry.
A humorous riff states eight million bacteria in a spoonful of milk and asks the population of a milk wagon. It muses on absent mindedness, a forgotten fishing trip, and political news as well as a sparrow’s imagined taste, tying in an Agriculture Department quip about insects.
A college professor laments Americans being overworked while a clergyman jokes golf keeps 100,000 caddies away from Sunday school. The piece notes vivid language in such statements and mocks a whale catching lasso as fit for an Ananias club member.
A notable shift in legal history marks women serving as judges in Australia, signaling broader gender progress in the judiciary. the move contrasts with sports headlines about the St. Louis Cardinals, highlighting differing national pursuits.
An American invited guest fell and fractured a leg in King George’s garden, an incident seen as contrary to court etiquette. The mishap sparked questions about decorum and protocol at the royal gathering.
Dr David Allyn Gordon of Brooklyn, 80, has become father to twins who are reported to be well. Doo Osier’s views are not yet obtained. A New York school offers a course in scientific baby washing and suggests extending it to boys under 14.
A U S citizen was arrested in London after tossing money along public streets. Reports imply the Hotel Employees union in London exercises influence with local authorities.
The coroner in Pennsylvania warns that the planned meeting may be a ploy to stimulate business, prompting public concern among residents about the event’s true purpose.
Kendal, a poverty-stricken artist, hides in a ghostly house where Grace Kempton, a dressmaker, moves in with Mrs. Blunt. They pool resources and plan a joint venture designing gowns while Kendal paints by day and sketches costumes by night. Their bond grows as a solution to hardship leads to a hopeful future in Italy.
A London Teleograph note reports a misprint in Browning's The Worst of It the line And I to have tempted you was likely tired not tired as printed The reader and editor Birrell overlook the error despite its obvious rhyme fix and long suspicion of textual slippage
Berlin correspondence reports a man advertising in a Halle newspaper for a house nearby. He specifies size and lease length no object and notes the door must be large enough to admit his wife’s new hat, as she cannot pass through the current door.
A guide from an early cosmetic column offers remedies for thin skin and wrinkles. It details almond oil and cucumber based cleansers, a rosemary and sage tonic, barley water washes, and honey with sour buttermilk as treatments. It warns protection from wind sun and heat.
A reader suggests an afternoon party for her mother’s visit in late June. She doubts entertainment beyond a sewing activity and a guessing contest with small prizes. The editor endorses the plan and notes guests will mingle while chatting with the mother.
The reader asks whether to use the same invitation style as others or a different approach for a class party honoring a teacher. Suggestions include speaking to the teacher, inviting class members as guests, hosting supper if enough attendees, then adding music and guessing games. Use of school colors is encouraged to show school spirit.
Decorate with the class colors and arrange flags pennants and Japanese lanterns for charm. For a regular banquet start with soup then fish and a suitable meat course with vegetables, then salad, followed by dessert such as cream, with coffee salted nuts and bonbons.
A reader asks how a gentleman should end mourning. Advice says to ease out gradually or all at once, wearing colored ties and colored linen while shedding mourning. It notes it is acceptable to wear colored accessories and even continue wearing black suits if not in mourning.
A reader asks if a woman should go alone or with her husband when returning a call and whose card to leave. The reply advises leaving two of the husband’s cards and one of the wife’s when returning the visit, noting few men make calls these days.
A decorative pincushion sketch shows a square cover whose surface is made of many small silk rounds in two colors such as pale pink and green. Each round is formed from silk over thin cardboard, shaped into a button, stitched with long silk threads, and lightly tacked together to reach a chosen size.
A humorous exchange imagines a wealthy life with daily fine dining and a scoreboard in the dining room. The butler tracks scores from across the country as the narrator jokes about taste and prestige in a lighthearted vignette.
A domestic interlude unfolds after the honeymoon as a wife contemplates leaving to stay with her mother but ultimately resists and remains at the cottage. The exchange highlights tension over independence and family ties.
In a light moment inside the cloak rooms of Congress, Bailey recalls his first trousers as a joyful memory. Howland recalls driving a pony and dog show chariot as his happiest moment. Redfield, from Brooklyn, jokes about long division and a schoolyard yawn that leads to a prank with a paper wad and a shipboard mishap.
A literary fragment notes character through small acts. The narrator recalls Julia breaking an engagement over Henry's cheap chocolates, illustrating how minor choices reveal core traits.
An advertises Murine Eye Remedy claiming relief for red weak and watery eyes with granulated lids. It notes oculists compound it not a patent medicine and offers bottles at 25c and 50c with illustrated book in each package from the Marine Eye Remedy Co Chicago.
A reformer asks why so many men remain confined in the jail. The guide quips that the answer lies in their inability to leave, highlighting debate over prison relief and release.
Advert says Castoria is a safe remedy used for over eighty years. It urges mothers to examine every bottle and ensure it bears the signature. Children cry for Fletcher's Castoria.
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