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Newspaper
Indiana Progress
Location
Indiana, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Date
Jun 24, 1896
Page
2
A sermon extols recognizing God's presence in daily life and providence. It argues that God ordains our occupations, residences, and hardships, guiding even minor events for our good, urging contentment with our allotted lot and trust in divine oversight.
An assortment of patent medicine pitches and anecdotes. Promotions for Asa Family Medicine Bacon's Celery for the nerves, Hood's Sarsaparilla, Hood's Pills, Dean's Ointment, Olive Blossom for divorce prevention, with multiple listed vendors and sample offers. Also notes on electricity speed and brief quips from newspapers.
In a witty Le Pa pillon remark, the tale recalls Mo lard absconding with 30,000 francs from his employer and fleeing with his employer’s umbrella. The banter frames the escapade as a lighthearted scandal rather than a grim crime.
EF Anthony, former postmaster of Promise City Iowa, testifies that one bottle of Mystic Cure bought from Herrick Bros and Tom E Hildebrand druggists in Indiana cured his rheumatism after two doses. He claims it did more good than any medicine he ever took.
Mary Morrisor of Crook County had a cataract removed at age 70 last month. Miss Mattie Carpenter of Allegheny County suffered years of eye muscle weakness causing headaches until Dr. Sadler performed an operation that gave instant relief. James Slinged Eyes Restored of Venicia, Washington, formerly a packer for Macbeth Glass Co. in Charleroi, after two failed operations, has had both eyes made perfectly straight by Dr. Sadler at 204 Penn Avenue, Pittsburgh.
A thrifty Philadelphia wife boasted of canning green peaches to serve at many tea parties. She partially cooked them so they stayed hard, causing utensils to fling them to the floor when cut. After guests left, the peaches were returned to the brandy shop for future use.
A noted quip says the woman of the hour is the one who promises to start in 15 minutes, with an hour being the usual near reach. The exchange features Mr. Ferry weighing in on readiness and timing.
A local application cannot reach the diseased ear. deafness arises from inflammation of the mucous lining of the Eustachian Tube. Nine of ten deafness cases are due to catarrh, an inflamed mucous surface. Hall's Catarrh Cure offers a cure, with a $100 reward for any unaided deafness case caused by catarrh not cured. Sold by Druggists for 75 cents.
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