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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Jul 31, 1903
Page
4
A collage of aphorisms and mock news items from Emmons County records, lampooning figures like Sir Thomas Lipton and Lieut Peary, while lampooning society, politics, and culture. The piece weaves jokes about tobacco, heighten glass prices, and a running quip on marriage and money.
A New York court weighed whether a patron may eat with his hat on and the time a U S business man must remove it. Scientists warn death from iced tea. 65 degree water is best in heat. Boys recall ice cold springs for dipping. A girl’s modesty rouses bachelor gossip. John Bull bans speed shows to spare limbs. Santos-Dumont pilots airship with children aboard. An American boy, ten, first flies above the trees.
The statement suggests that once recovered, he will vow to cease hostilities toward Abyssinians and direct future battles solely against British forces.
Instead of claiming to be the coolest place in the country this summer the resort will push a warmest season approach to attract visitors. The shift aims to lure guests with heat oriented messaging and seasonal promos.
Representative Buckmans in Washington to confer with Land Commissioner Richards on rearrangements of land districts in Minnesota. Frank Brown, once of Mansfield Ohio, jailed in Guatemala for months without trial, appeals to the state department via Minister Combes at Guatemala City. A. O. Wright, supervisor of the third Indian school district, moves to the fifth district and J. E. House moves to the third.
Niagara Falls authorities issue warrants for twenty New York Central railroad clerks over a freight car robbery. In Illinois a Marengo man James Ford killed Mrs Louise E Harding then killed himself. In Morgantown a card game fight left Tom Carter dead and others wounded. An Alabama man Orrin Carter mortally wounds Will Rhine after a dispute with Rhine’s prior quarrel with Carter’s mother.
Four young men die near Avondale Ohio when struck by a passenger train. A severe hail storm and cloudburst cause damage at Trinidad California. In Cleveland an electric car collision kills E I Garin of Oberlin and harms several others. A man drowns in Lake Michigan near Chicago identified as inventor and sculptor Nels P Neilson. A Roanoke magazine blast kills two, with sixteen injured. Major Edward Hughes of Louisville dies after being run over by a trolley. A Trenton horse loses a hoof after dynamite detonation. Cincinnati union station crash injures ten and fatally harms Mrs Carrie Crawford and Henry Ellswick. Illinois Central near Alhambra halts a burning bridge with two boggys using a red shirt as a signal. Robert Woods and wife fatally burned in Philadelphia. son-in-law William Buck injured. Atlantic Yacht Club chairman Edwin H. Low drowns when Pickaninny capsizes off Sea Gate. Mrs Madge Warren wounds Kentuckian Richard Hudson in Lexington with an unloaded revolver. Three men drown near Philadelphia. one man dies from a neck injury diving shallow water. Atlantic City life guards rescue twenty-one tied to depth incident.
A severe quake shook St. Vincent while reports cite Russia arranging a 26 million dollar loan via French capitalists. General Brailimont died in Brussels. Belgium mourns a top fortifications authority. London circles expect Marl Dorong to become under secretary for the colonies and Parliament to dissolve early with early March elections. The American squadron reached Lisbon but mourning delays festivities.
In Frankfort Kentucky seven fist fights occurred in one day with no pistol use. A. Parsons a former brakeman is jailed in St. Louis on charges of killing his wife after claiming she was a burglar. George Collins in Union Missouri faces a death sentence for murder of Detective Schumacher. Oscar Stontaugh a Spokane metallurgist and mining executive died by his own hand after a distinguished career. A San Francisco soldier’s wife reports him missing. John Gotens at Joliet shoots and kills his son in a quarrel. Authorities pursue Basin Basin ligature killers.
The article notes a range of items from a Chicago transport plan to separate news items. It mentions Charles Berrick, Buffalo builder, dead after surgery, a New Orleans cotton bale sale, a Lexington Ky camp meeting death of Rev S Osborne, a river steamer panic in Philadelphia, and various other brief notices across politics, industry, science, and crime.
Washington in late July reports that four indictments are likely from the postal probe to be returned by the federal grand jury Monday. The cases involve three postal officials and a contractor, with one party not a Washington resident, and reflect long deliberations and actions already taken by investigators.
Miller Gilder and Randall, linked to the Mutual Hail Insurance Co of Hankinson, were convicted of using the mails for unlawful purposes. Judge Amidon denied a new trial. Miller and Gilder receive one year and a day in the Sioux Falls penitentiary. Randall gets eight months in James Town jail. Each man fined $1,000.
King Edward and Queen Alexandra toured public institutions in Dublin on a perfect day. The king visited a residence built for working people by Lord Iveagh Cecil Guinness and others, meeting residents and chatting with them alongside Lord Iveagh Lord Ardilaun Arthur Guinness and Irish Secretary Wyndham.
Augustus Heinze files supreme court petition to remove 125000 Amalgamated Copper bonds from the Daly Bank and Trust company amid claims of insolvency. Amalgamated Copper attorney counters with affidavits from prominent bankers asserting the bank is solvent.
International convention of the German Evangelical Churches of the United States Germany Switzerland and Japan will be held at Cedar Falls Park between Cedar Falls and Waterloo next month. About five hundred delegates are expected with workers of prominence from all countries in attendance and summer cottages donated for visitor use.
An investigation at Camp Douglas led by Adjt. Gen. Boardman examines a charge that four Kaukauna men not in the Neenah company took the places of absent enlistees to swell the unit. Capt. Schneller of Neenah contends the men were regularly enlisted.
Chicago July 26 The Teamsters Union voted to abandon its sympathetic strike against Kellogg Switchboard Company ending talk of a general strike. The move followed rebukes for breaking agreements by unions that asked them to join.
A $3,000 worth of silver bullion stolen Tuesday evening from the bimetallic rail was recovered when boys at the mill spotted a bullion bar protruding from a hole where it had been hastily buried.
Lamont Iowa July 26 Hdile Ward aged twenty shot and killed himself in his room. The young man had just got home from hauling milk. There was no cause known.
Jester Boehme also known as Jack O Gorman was found not guilty of murdering Roy Streeter a colored prizefighter. This marked Boehme's second trial after a first trial ended in a disagreement.
Guthrie Ohio July 24 town of Landers population 600 was destroyed by fire yesterday. One resident Jason Burgeng was buried in a fatal blaze. Officials report extensive losses and assess the damage as total.
Rome reports Pope Leo XIII has died at age ninety three after a two week decline from pleuro pneumonia and age related decay. Cardinals prepare the death chamber pronouncement and embalm the body for a nine day funeral procession ending at St John Lateran. Cardinal Oreglia assumes directing affairs until a successor is elected.
A rear end collision between two freight trains occurred early yesterday on the Canadian Pacific railroad bridge over the Grand River near Galt Ontario. Two cars were plunged into the river, four bodies recovered with one more believed trapped in the wreck at river bottom.
Vincenzo Joachim Pecci born March 2 1810 at Carpineto Italy to noble parents. He studied in Rome joined the Academy of Noble Ecclesiasties, became archbishop and later apostolic nuncio to Brussels, cardinal in 1853, president of the apostolic chamber in 1877, elected pope February 20 1878, died July 20 1908.
The article describes the solemn distribution of mourning in St Peter's and the Vatican rituals. Cardinals kneel in prayer while the faithful gather, as bells across Rome toll in synchronized lament. A cardinal sprinkles holy water and names Gioacchino, marking a peak moment in the papal passing observances.
Washington July 23 The Government Printing Office faces union resistance as William H Miller is to be reinstated as assistant foreman but the binders union refuses his return. They warn of covert threats if the President and Secretary Cortelyou insist on the reinstatement.
Chicago reports that four Chicago anarchists pledged to kill Emperor William of Germany have left for Sweden and are now on a death mission. Chief O'Neill confirms London dispatches. Oscar has been warned.
A war is brewing between cattlemen and sheepmen in Grant Malheur and Harney counties Oregon. Cattlemen have posted notices threatening to kill sheepmen unless flocks stay out of designated districts. Several confrontations have occurred in remote areas. no deaths reported.
The New York watershed board issues eviction notices to about 200 villagers in the Armonk area and nearby towns, directing residents to move out immediately from watershed property owned by the city. The action affects a northern Westchester county zone, amid court orders tied to the New York city water system.
Joliet July 23 John Gotens a wealthy farmer about seventy drew a revolver in a quarrel with his grown son and fatally shot him. The man died within minutes. Gotens was arrested and jailed awaiting examination.
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