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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Aug 14, 1903
Page
6
A string of satirical jabs and light quotes spans politics, society, and culture. It notes Lipton’s oat, a hill city, prom trends, a sympathetic strike, and cautions against choosing both evils. Observations touch on Rockefeller, Servia, sultans, and a Glasgow whisky fire with sharp, period humor.
A note about German scientists examining American farming in Chicago, implying deep knowledge of rare crops. A New York Press observer quips about how rosy lips may look alike yet taste different, suggesting caution in making public statements.
Rev. Matt S. Hughes argues that the man in an epic outshines the writer and hopes current authors will turn to nobler, better themes in future epics.
A newspaper note quips that the saying death lengthens life comforts Pope Leo while he receives care. In Toledo a mayoral hopeful camps on a roof under mosquito netting, illustrating the lengths local seekers go to elude him.
A Brooklyn man opposes a memorial park honoring Henry Ward Beecher in Plymouth square arguing he was not nationally renowned. The item notes lingering curiosity about Brooklyn’s rise to fame and hints at cultural figures influencing the city. A New York poet is elected railroad president and is expected to have a grand career. The text also suggests Mme Calve’s relocation implies financial comfort.
Camile Flammarion asserts humanity is slowly aging stars under observation and urges action before opportunity passes. He promotes embracing celestial paths while risks loom for delaying exploration.
Vast salt deposits in Cracow area Poland yield a mine open to visitors with carved salt chapels and long galleries. The Cracow mine, continuously worked since 1251, suggests centuries more supply and attracts many guides showing miles of tunnels and spectacular salt sculptures. Benjamin F. Perry of Grand Junction Colorado is the inventor of a device for eye treatment using controlled pressure and vacuum to stimulate circulation.
An old style horse harness is redesigned to free the animal’s body for a straight pull. A curved strap distributes movement over the back and is held by a breeching and collar strap, reducing body interference in hot weather. Inventor Frederick L. Ainsworth of Turner Kansas introduces the modification.
Mr. Yarrow, a renowned English shipbuilder, attacks the submarine boat as a war craft. He expresses no faith in submarines for offense or defense and doubts practical results from current maritime experiments. He argues submarines work only against stationary vessels and cannot reliably attack moving ships, noting torpedo boats offer similar power with less risk and cost.
Lord Rayleigh has long studied surface tension in liquids noting maximum tension in pure water which drops when oil or grease is added. Demonstrations show camphor rotates water. applying oil stops the rotation. He asserts an oil film can be extremely thin perhaps a molecule thick.
Describes a new magazine rifle with automatic firing capability that surpasses Civil War muskets and earlier single barrel guns. Notes its use by sportsmen and its replacement of older firearms. Mentions an accompanying illustration showing a revolver-like feature integrated into the design.
Describes a rotary carrier system in a cartridge magazine for a rifle. The stock stores loaded shells, a rotary carrier presents cartridges to the barrel, a backing block seats each cartridge, and a firing pin is ready. The carrier is spring controlled, wound during filling, and drops back after each discharge.
A historic note states Weir's method estimates absolute temperatures from radiation wavelengths. It gives ranges for celestial bodies Sun 4850–5450 F Sirius 5700–6400 Vega 5700–6400 Arcturus 2450–2700 Aldebaran 2500–2850 F and electric light 3150–3500 F, linking white and blue stars to higher heat than red and yellow.
Peter V. Cornils of Seattle unveils an automatic engine cut-off designed to reduce steam pressure when boat propellers rise out of water. The system uses open-ended cylinders on each side of the boat, with pistons affected by water level and air pressure to regulate steam valves as waves lift and submerge the propeller.
A lead cell of an automobile storage battery can lift its own weight about 63 4 miles, showing little energy. In contrast a good piece of steam coal could raise its weight about 2000 miles, making coal about 350 times richer in energy than the battery.
Prof W C McIntosh urges a biological survey to aid fish and their food supply and insists no important species face extinction. He notes mass extinctions in ancient reptilian eras were not caused by modern swarms and argues future extinction need not be feared.
Paris municipality invites tenders for supply of automobile street refuse collecting vans. Successful firm to receive an initial order for thirty vans.
A crowd bursts with praise as an amateur vocalist finishes her selection. Stauggins hails the performance as splendid while a nearby observer decries it as atrocious. Stauggins defends the act as the lady’s nerve and claims the display surpasses professional stages.
In a brief exchange the boy asks for the meaning of a man’s “better half” and the father, reading the evening paper, answers that it means exactly what she says. The moment conveys a practical view of partnership and communication.
Adolphus asks what to wear to the Gorgson ball and is advised a wallflower look. The exchange hints at social customs and tongue in cheek humor within a local society scene.
A young housekeeper asks for two pounds of butter and a dozen eggs plus a box of seeded raisins. She adds she would also like to try two pounds of electric currents in the fruit cake to test if they improve the old recipe.
Farmer Corntossel complains about high meat and ice costs and considers growing their own ice by sourcing an ice plant from the city. Mrs Corntossel suggests obtaining an ice plant to produce cheaper ice.
Mrs Oldcastle asks the new neighbor about a book plate and the hostess explains Josiah has none his keeps his in cases to avoid dust from plates.
Dialogue shows Mary promising to save for wedding items once her wages rise next month. The exchange involves a mistress and Mary discussing how to answer Patrick about marriage. The fragment suggests domestic scene and plans for upcoming nuptials.
In a brief Stray stories exchange, Phillips accuses Perkins of owing a dollar. Perkins denies the debt, promises payment, and asks for more time to settle the amount.
Mr Wedley asks if he will be the defendant in a divorce suit. Mrs Wedley replies that the request comes as a sudden shock to her.
A humorous dialogue shows Mrs Binke teasing Old Binks about his carnival costume knickers while he retorts that the sight would make his whiskers vanish quickly. The playful exchange captures light local humor typical of the era.
An Irish woman, arrested for striking her husband with a poker, offers a quip about temper in court. She says the couple cannot help a little friendly tiff and jokes about temperamental clashes.
In a playful dialogue, a teacher and scholar debate the fate of Lot's wife, concluding she was turned into a quantity of salt. The exchange frames a quick, witty biblical remark in a humorous classroom moment.
A householder cautions that a bill is excessively large while a grocery clerk explains the boys sent him to collect it, highlighting concern over the sum and the method of collection.
In Lippincott's Magazine an old stage route from Lake Champlain to Ogdensburg recounts Pat the Irish substitute driver racing a stage past Sodom, outrunning danger until the wagon pole breaks. Passengers flee as the tongue drags, Pat quips he feared a horse outrunning the wagon.
This vignette follows a young couple with their first baby. The husband frets over finances as the father disapproves, yet the father later sends a $1,000 gift for the child, while the mother remains buoyant. The husband wistfully notes twins would have been better.
Wu Ting Fang in memory inspires gaiety with a dinner tale recounting a mandarin who raises a son to ignore women. On descent a trio of maidens appear and the youth, perceiving them, cries that the tallest devil is a woman with sorrowful yearning.
A West Virginia senator recalls a mountain tale of a thirsty hunter who offers a dollar for a kiss to a charming girl. After taking the kiss he pays the dollar, the girl contemplates what to do with the money and finally offers to return it and take another kiss.
London Morning Post notes a dealer near the British Museum displayed a portrait of a well known literary critic and a reproduction of a painting by a famed Academician. The caption for the painting read Weeding the Pavement, Broughton, while the portrait is titled E Goose. Such is fame.
A countryman sits in a cheap restaurant and surveys a bald man with rustic curiosity. He points out to his wife that the bald head is “fair enough on that man’s head to spite a pound of butter,” prompting amused commentary from the periodical.
Ira Condit of Roseland New Jersey marks his 95th birthday as the youngest of eleven siblings all born in the same ancestral home. His father enlisted at sixteen and his grandfather also served as a soldier in the Continental Army.
A jeweler and friends found a giant centipede near Broken Arrow while visiting Mount Dickinson. The creature measured a little over seven inches with more than 200 legs and a stinger at each leg, making it one of the largest ever recorded in Indian Territory.
Prof. Virchow claimed Albanians possess the most intellectual skulls in Europe yet hold a belief in superiority over other races. He noted that Albanians view death with calm indifference, saying death is a plague, but living is half a plague.
William P. Charles, proprietor of the Charles Commercial School in Brooklyn, has traveled to Barbados at the invitation of British authorities to explain the American system of commercial schools and to promote its adoption on the islands.
A leading general returning from the Philippines showed his tattered flag captured from the enemy to his family. The next morning the flag disappeared until his wife confessed she sat up all night and mended it, making it look nearly as good as new for presentation to the commander in chief.
Do Your Feet Ache and Burn Shake into your shoes Allen's Foot-Base a powder for the feet. It makes tight or new shoes feel good. Cures swollen hot sweating feet corns and bunions. At all druggists and shoe stores 25c. Sample sent Free. Address Allen 8 Olmsted LeRoy NY.
The wife of T W Russell, a brilliant Irish agitator, is praised for courage amid election news from South Tyrone. A friend urged police at the temperance hotel, but she refused, keeping every room lit, blinds up, and sitting in a visible window, waiting for trouble that did not come.
The president shakes hands with a puzzled man amid a crowd of boys and congratulates him on his large family. The little man explains those aren’t his kids, saying he is taking the orphan asylum to see the circus parade. Chicago News reports the humorous exchange.
An Irish commuter retorts to being warned about track safety as a locomotive approaches. The dialogue, captured by Chicago News, showcases blunt street speech and a tester’s challenge to railway company reliability.
Harper's Weekly reports a London case where a house painter is deemed not a gentleman unless bearing arms or a coat of arms. The bench notes that many present are called gentlemen at political meetings, and cites the painter’s goat as a supposed mark. Justice Darling is named.
A Lancaster man touts Postum Food Coffee as a cure for his wife’s nervousness stomach troubles and appetite loss after switching from coffee. He says her condition improved rapidly with better sleep and vitality and urges readers to try Postum with lemon ice as a cooling drink and to request more details by mail.
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