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This newspaper page contains 9 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Denton Journal
Location
Denton, Maryland, United States of America
Date
Aug 05, 1911
Page
4
The dairyman who reads and keeps abreast of modern methods outpaces rivals. Information by word of mouth is slow, and sticking to ancestral ways will leave one behind. Reading leads to better sires, higher milk yield, smarter feeding, and improved sanitary conditions on the farm.
A farmer and his cow share a humorous exchange about finance and syndicates. The cow quips about water and memory while the rooster observes. The pun plays on stock markets and livestock.
The article notes that only about thirty days pay separated the average city wage earner from starvation and remarks that most farmers could keep the wolf from the door longer than that.
A description of deep cracks in Rocky Mountain plateaus near edges where blizzards fill them with ice. Cattle and horses fall into these vents unaware of the danger and perish, becoming chilled, mummy like remains in the sunless crevices.
The late Galdwin Smith recalling Robert Lowe later Jord Sher brooke notes his near sightedness. He read with his nose literally touching the page yet took high honors at Oxford. A wit quipped Lowe would have earned higher honors if he had not rubbed out with his nose what he had written with his pen.
A brief Chicago News dialogue reports Cholly confronting Mr. Butts about his dog. The dog allegedly growled during a call to Mr. Butts’s daughter. The exchange ends with plans to replace the dog.
Toledo Blade notes a phrase social lemonade as a witty way to deliver sour remarks in a sweet tone. The item defines the term and highlights its use in social commentary.
The Houston Post prints a quip about a man offered an orange grove proposition asking where it is. He replies he has invested all his money in a fruit orchard on his wife's hat, delivering a playful line about mistaken location or value.
A fragmentary newspaper item cites a Louisville Courier-Journal remark about offering a cautioned hotel list. It pairs a Roosevelt quote on heart and a philosophy line attributed to Plutarch, then ends with malformed text and stray punctuation.
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