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This newspaper page contains 9 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Defiance County Express
Location
Defiance, Ohio, United States of America
Date
Aug 16, 1883
Page
7
A collage of satirical quips from papers like Simba Gazette Brooklyn Eagle and Yonkers Statesman mocks relentless cream cravings and unpaid plates. The verses depict suitors, wary lovers, and comic admonitions about debt, virtue, and restraint in playful old newspaper style.
The tale recounts Squire Doolittle and his sons plotting a joke on him. He tries to outwit the old ram David by using a half bushel measure to bait him, but the ram charges and overturns the Squire into the creek. The boys revel in the mishap, and the Squire buys them a fishing line as compensation while nursing his bruised pride.
A Detroit Free Press item recounts a humorous city hall encounter where a visitor named John Linden asks odd questions about horses, Cleopatra, Shakespeare, drowning revived, maternal instincts, and a fire at Ephesian dome. The official, hurried home for dinner, dodges bets and avoids giving answers. John Eggleston, aged seventy four, long Corinth resident, died recently, never leaving his hometown.
A miscellaneous Washington style digest discusses judging horses by standing still to reveal limb defects, agile fruit growing tips from an Indianapolis grower, and a variety of kitchen and garden recipes. It broadens into veterinary treatment detailing blistering for animals, its proper use, safety cautions, and alternatives like mustard pastes for large areas.
The article explains dairy practices such as feeding oats for milk, weighing milk to estimate monthly quarts, and eye injuries in cows. It notes a large Danish cheese factory reducing Europe’s need for American land cheese, Sunday cream usage to avoid factory work, and differing flavors from sweet versus sour cream. It also covers skimming milk young, storing cream in a stone jar, souring cream at sixty degrees to improve butter yield and speed of churning.
The piece extols aged butter and criticizes modern methods, recalling years when year old butter kept well and sold for favorable prices. It describes a traditional process: cows pasture fed, thorough washing, brining, pressing into white oak tubs, air exclusion, and slow ripening to develop a rich nutty aroma. It notes a method preserving color, texture, and flavor unlike new butter, with explicit packing steps and brine management.
A Louisville souvenir scene features a No. 4 short German silver fishing reel given to President Arthur during his visit. The ornate piece, set in red gel slides with jeweled pivots and an agate handle, comes in a brown alligator skin case lined with satin and velvet, noted by the Chicago Journal amid a collection of varied 19th century curios and medical advertisements.
A historical advertisement extols malaria as mischievous and harmful while praising Brown's Iron Bitters as a powerful tonic. It asserts the remedy strengthens the blood, liver, and stomach, and claims it avoids teeth staining, constipation, or headaches. The piece emphasizes using the tonic to combat malaria’s effects.
A column denounces miracle cures sold by a patent medicine, condemning testimonials as misleading while touting Hop Bitters as the true cure. It recounts a Pittsburgh physician mocked for endorsing the remedy and appeals to readers to note they saw the ad in this paper.
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