He Laughs Best Who Laughs Last
A humorous ad touts Hood's Sarsaparilla as a health tonic. It asserts only one in ten has pure blood and claims the remedy cleanses blood to improve health so everyone can laugh often.
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Newspaper
Chipley Banner
Location
Chipley, Florida, United States of America
Date
Sep 16, 1899
Page
4
A humorous ad touts Hood's Sarsaparilla as a health tonic. It asserts only one in ten has pure blood and claims the remedy cleanses blood to improve health so everyone can laugh often.
A street railroad employee uses a copper wire decoy rig to electrocute sparrows for pie making. The method involves grounding a wire over trolley lines and retrieving with rubber gloves, a plan described with grim practicality. The note also contains a dated quip about Wintersmith’s Chill Cure and a misattributed Cuban fever statistic.
At the United States Printing Company plant in Eggleston avenue Cincinnati a new six foot diameter cylindrical fire escape was tested. Three hundred employees from seven floors rode the steel tube at sixty per minute and the building emptied in five minutes without a casualty.
A reflective meditation on how the will shapes surroundings and habits, the power of perseverance, and the duty of mutual aid. It contrasts genuine virtue with mere appearance, notes how kindness in childhood leaves a lasting imprint, and urges economical living, enduring aims, and fulfilling present duties for tomorrow.
A physician explains stair ascent should use a square footed step with heel down and slow deliberate motion to avoid muscle strain. The Bournemouth Directory notes few walk stairs without effort. In Europe 4200 plant species are used commercially, 420 scented. white flowers lead with 1124 species, 187 perfumed.
Jonas Stadling documents a Lapland milking scene in the Century visiting a reindeer camp. Herds are driven into an inclosure, dogs guide the thousands of running animals, and women milk the females while children collect the milk. Milk yield is tiny yet nourishing, milking happens chiefly in winter.
A mixture of anecdotes about legal minds and editors, quack cures, and ads fills a ragged page. The piece mentions Vice-Chancellor Bacon and a clever inner bar member, then shifts to tobacco cessation promises and a catarrh cure. It also notes a Connecticut woolen company organized and assorted mottos.
The Chicago Times-Herald notes that A. T. Stewart, once a national dry goods giant, stayed in the public eye through constant advertising while Judge Henry Hilton shifted focus to law and ceased active promotion. After Hilton’s changes and rival campaigns, Stewart’s business declined, ending in 1896 with liabilities of 2.54 million and no assets.
A jumble of short items and dubious health claims appears with fitness and beauty pitches. References include Cascarets candy, Teething remedies, and dogskin clothing notes from Northern China, alongside a prophecy by Professor Darwin and a whimsical bicycle accident.
A Prussian regiment based in Glogau in Silesia tested crossing the Oder with guns trained on wheels and three barrels attached to the axle and pole. Horses were moved aside while the crew pushed the guns into the water and ferried them across, guiding by the rest of the troops. The method proved successful and authorities considered it useful in emergencies without engineers to build bridges.
A condemned prisoner discusses life imprisonment with his lawyer. The lawyer shifts from a life sentence to a more hopeful view, suggesting the convict may not live long.
Cartoon dialogue shows a boy named Tommy asked if his father knows he smokes. The exchange suggests parental concerns about teen smoking and a parent’s reaction to the habit.
An advertisement extols Hostetter's Stomach Bitters as the fastest remedy to strengthen the nervous system and treat blood, stomach, and liver issues. It warns against substitutes and notes a revenue stamp on the bottle neck. Also promotes No-To-Lac for fifty cents as a tobacco habit cure.
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