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Cedar Rapids Gazette (Newspaper) - July 21, 1974, Cedar Rapids, Iowa A modest proposal The Cedar Rapids Gazette: Sob., July 21, 1971 if fa Single combat in the desert? By Jenkm Lloyd Jones TWERP IS a way in which the Arab-* Israeli conflict can ho resolved without a now war It is in tho history books. It is called single* combat, and tho best thing about it is that if tho rules are observed the dispute vanishes and not more than one person dies Back in the days of the Norman kings of England, land disputes among the great nobles were fierce and courts were weak Trial by combat was common and often sanctioned by the crown itself when no compromise seemed possible. As Shakespeare’s Richard II said of Bolingbroke and Mowbray High stomached are they both, and full of ire, In rage, deaf as the sea, hasty as fire." This is not a bad description of the Arab-Israeli conflict. As Richard Nixon found when he toured the Middle Eastern capitals, Henry Kissinger’s cease-fire’ sits on jelly Hardly had the President winged westward toward the Azores before Israeli planes were raiding suspected strongholds of Arab terrorists in Lebanon (and bagging quite a few nonterrorists). Enraged Arab statesmen were threatening to hurl the whole truce agreement into the fire. So far, the Israelis and Arabs are leagues apart, and the hope that they will inch forward to a common meeting point is a candle hand-shielded in a hurricane. Both have atrocities to remember Both are utterly self-justified The valor by which the Israelis conquered much is beginning to be matched by their enemies. The Arabs now see themselves going from strength to strength, although disunity is their ancient curse. The obvious solution to the holy city of Jerusalem, that of turning it into an internationalized pan-religious shrine, is angrily rejected by them both The United Nations is helpless as an arbiter. The Security Council is paralyzed by the veto The Assembly, more and more the preserve of the anti-Israeli “Third World,” is a clown’s club. But there is still some fallback room Although in Syria and Jordan there is Jenkm Lloyd Jones considerable righteous pretense that the Arab terrorists have been driven into machine-gunning airports and coldly pistoling schoolchildren, there is also great embarrassment among many Arabs. You don’t hear much talk about driving the Israelis into the sea any more The Arab demand now is not obliteration but a withdrawal by Israel to its original boundaries in accordance with the now-dusty U N. resolution. At the same time, IsraH has stood in the cold shower of the new reality. Damascus or Cairo are no longer Sunday drives. Its generals aren’t IO feet tall, after all. There’s financial and parliamentary trouble and growing isolation as most of the world salaams before the power of Arab oil. So wouldn’t it be wonderful if both sides could come up with a best offer0 Say the Arabs would agree to call off the boycott, squash the Palestinian terrorists and give Israel free access to the Suez (’anal and the Gulf of Aqaba in return for Israel shrinking itself to the U N. boundaries. And say the Israelis would agree to give up the Sinai, cede to Jordan that part of Jerusalem that contains the Dome of the Rock, give up all conquests east of the Jordan river except the Golan Heights and offer to make a lump-sum cash settlement to Palestinian refugees as ordered, let’s say, by the World Court. Neither offer would come close to the other. But neither would be excessively Opinion Page 2 Ideas Judgments Views Insights Comments injurious to the other Then on with the single combat! Let the Israelis pick their Sorab and the Arabs their Rustum and let them go at each other with pistols, swords or nets and tridents unto the death The huge revenue from TV rights could be equally split between Arab and Jewish charities Ridiculous? Of course. But what is probably going to happen will be far more ridiculous Uncle Sam is being euchred into supplying arms to both sides World Jewry, and particularly the American portion, will be bled white shoring up the increasingly beleaguered little state Decent Arabs will continue gagging as they conceal and support the paranoiac terrorists whom Israel will keep trying to bomb until full-scale war boils up again And only the Kremlin, which has equal contempt for Jehovah and Allah, will profit. Why wouldn’t a climactic single combat be a lot smarter0 Gtnurol Features Carceration Criticism of unclad colonials exposed By Don Oakley TpVEN GEORGE Washington had trouble with “streakers.” An aide’s book containing Washington s orders to the Continental army in Massachusetts is the source of this footnote to history, dated Aug. 22. 1775 “The general does not mean to discourage the practice of bathing while the weather is warm but he expressly forbids any person doing it at or near the bridge in Cambridge, where it has been observed and complained of that many men. lost to all sense of decency and common modesty, are running about naked upon the bridge while passengers and even ladies of the first fashion in the neighborhood are passing over it, as if they meant to glory in their shame.’’ The directive was discovered by archivist Howard ll Wehmann of the National Archives in Washington in the course of researching material for the 197fi bicentennial and reported in the National Observer. May it serve as the last comment on the streaking fad Nf’W'-DOOf’i Filterer'se Association Trading isn't cricket Pro athletes have rights, too By Norman Cousins REPORTS in the newspapers about the attempt of football players to acquire the rights to their services have reminded me that there may be a basic issue here the American people havent vet thought through Like thousands of Little Leaguers. I grew up dreaming I might become a professional baseball player. That aspiration dimmed in my teens, but I don t think I ever really got over my infatuation with the sport. It didn’t trouble me that ballplayers, once they made the grade, didn t have the same freedom of employment that other Americans enjoyed. It seemed only natural to me that players — whether in baseball, football, basketball or hockey — should be “sold” or "traded ” In fact, I didn’t see how the game could operate on any other basis. That was the way it had always been, and it was nothing to be questioned Just after college, my first job was as a sportswriter I began to realize I had been so wedded to the traditions and folklore of baseball that I had blinded myself to the realities. And the more I learned at close range, the more I realized that I was wrong in thinking that baseball or any other professional sport would fall apart if the players owned themselves and were free not just to bargain for their salaries but to have a voice as to where they wanted to play I also came to realize that the ar gument over whether baseball is a sport or a business is completely irrelevant If it is unconstitutional and immoral to buy (nether ii ' Now, sports fans, here is the up to the minute news con cerning the National football league strike and sell human beings, it doesn’t make any difference whether the enterprise is called a sport or a business. The basic laws of this country were not established for some groups and not others. It is absurd to say that it is all right to sell or trade human beings like chattel just because they bring entertainment to large numbers of people. It is equally absurd to say that professional sports figures don’t have to play if they don't like the contract offered them, or if they don’t want to be traded or sold What this line of reasoning overlooks is that the penalty to a player for refusing to be traded is that he can be deprived of his livelihood altogether. Would a business executive be willing to accept the proposition that he can be traded to another company and that, if he refuses, no other company will take him0 Way with words Al! right adverbs By Theodore M. Bernstein CORRECT TIME a sentence read, “It seems worse mornings, and that prompted J. C. Ropier of Huntingdon Valley, Pa., to ask whether such use of morning* is ungrammatical The answer is no. Mornings is an adverb in perfectly good standing, and so are nights and evening* They appear as such in just about every dictionary Here s hoping Mr Mopier will now be able to sleep nights They are sanctioned Right? In a column in The Washington County Post of Cambridge, N Y„ Nick Mahoney recalls that his teacher laid down a rule that “a sentence is a group of words containing a verb and its subject and expressing a complete thought. He remembers that when he and his schoolmates wrote1 compositions they of ten were returned with the marking “InC” in the margin, meaning that a sentence was incomplete Other teachers write in the margin “frag,” meaning sentence fragment, for the same purpose, The reproof usually comes when a pupil writes something like this “My parents scolded me for hav ing dirty Would a city official from San Francisco, say. accept the notion that he* can be sent to Corpus Christi and that if he doesn’t like it he can lump it0 A great injustice has been done in the* name of sports for much too long. The surest way of correcting that injustice is for the American people to see the issue* in sports for what it is and to support athlete's in their attemipt to bring professional sports within constitutional protections The American people need not fear that their favorite sport will be impaired in any way if a player retains basiq ownership of his talents. A game of baseball or football or basketball will still be as exciting as it ever was. The only change will be that players will probably get a larger share of the total pie and will be in a position to control their own destinies. Lo* Ang#l#s Tlmrs Syndicate hands. And my brother, too.’’ By schoolroom standards those final four words are not a sentence; they are a sentence fragment For most pupils — indeed, for most people — those standards are good to follow But modern usage permits sentence fragments for emphasis, for dramatic effect or for expressing a comment — in general for putting life into the written word by making it akin to the spoken word Here is an example from an ad “Tell your travel agent where in the world you want to go. How much you can spend And how long you can get away Two words of caution are necessary, however First, a writer should know what he is about and second, he should not overdo the sentence fragment, it should tx* used sparingly If he obeys those two cautions, he may substitute for Miss Thistlebottom’s definition of a sentence the one that appears in the Oxford English dictionary “in popular use often, such a portion of a composition or utterance as extends from one full stop to another ” Word oddities A word that has come up frequently in the Watergate goings on is stonewall, usually used as a verb meaning to hamper or obstruct things as if one were an immovable stonewall The verb was originally a cricket term with the sense of playing a solidly defensive game, but then was taken over as a political term conveying the idea of obstructing parliamentary business bv filibustering or by other delaying tactics Nev# York Time* Syndics# Save now on linens, home needs and baby things. 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