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This newspaper page contains 25 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Browning Leader Record
Location
Browning, Missouri, United States of America
Date
Mar 13, 1913
Page
4
The article reports Casper the second initiating a new uniform design for all state outfits. An artist reviews sketches showing vivid combinations from green coats to orange trousers and scarves. The president notes a secret police outfit with a yellow dress trimmed in purple, amid varied military and naval styles.
A Cleveland Plain Dealer note recalls a visiting Bostonian and a local guide at a ball game. The local insists the pitcher threw a curved ball, while the Bostonian calls it sinusoidal. They leave after six innings with the home team trailing.
A Northside lumber dealer warned a stranger that a pile of lumber he contracted to supply was knothole riddled. The buyer laughed and accepted, saying the knotholes would not matter since the wood would go around baseball grounds and he used to be a kid.
A committee questions the state senator about promised road projects. The senator defends the delay citing airships becoming common and suggests waiting years. He quips about weather being good for corn.
Dialog shows Uptown and Downtown residents discussing moving to a better neighborhood. The exchange reveals concern about housing and the desire for improvements while remaining on their current street.
A brief dialogue fragment shows two coworkers sharing enthusiasm about a new position. One asks how the other likes the job, and the response expresses satisfaction with duties resembling past aspirations in antique work. The snippet ends abruptly with an unfinished exchange.
In a Kansas City Star tale Julia, a ten year old in Sunday school, tears up after confessing she gave fifty cents from the family pin money to a man at the back door believing the visitor might be God. The scene echoes a biblical lesson about entertaining angels unawares.
Verena seeks napkins for Uncle Elijah while jokes about manicure visits, Mr Plimmins, Mr Spooner and tight shoes surface. A light domestic vignette shows Mrs Chucksley tending Bobby and Clarence contemplating facial hair in a lively drawing room moment.
A New York farmer visits an upstate dentist for an ulcerated tooth. The dentist offers gas to ease pain and demonstrates the machine. The patient agrees, but jokes he should count his money first before sleeping through the procedure.
A tramp seeking food at a back door tells a woman he was offered a steady job by a neighbor in a large white house. The work required starting at 4 a.m. to milk 17 cows, feed and groom four horses, clean stables, and chop wood before the day begins. He did not learn the pay. Youth's Companion.
A girl asks how to tell a yacht from a sailboat and Captain Cleet jokes that the difference lies in the pantry. If the craft carries plenty of refreshments and cigars it is a yacht. if only plain victuals are aboard it is a sailboat.
The passage references Willie Pa, Mr Jones, Mr Smith and Mr Robinson discussing the P in autos as a satirical remark about sales terms. It hints at a lighthearted explanation of price or term in automobile dealings without clear detail.
In a legislative exchange, Senator Sorghum and a colleague discuss free trade and protection. The reply appears garbled, with phrases like I’m beginning to understand it myself and odd spellings. The moment underscores congressional difficulty with the topic.
The essay traces the Lamb of God motif from Old Testament types through John the Baptist’s proclamation to John’s gospel and Revelation. It links Jesus to sacrifices, emphasizes his deity, and notes the Lamb as central in heaven, the Bible, and eternal judgment.
An East European immigrant with a phonetically spelled name struggles to read and write. At the local post office a clerk cannot spell Ca choo Joe causing an exchange about literacy. The punch line has the immigrant asking why the post office cannot be sold to someone who can spell.
Mrs Annie Saunders of Monroe relates a six week old baby with a spreading rash causing crusting itching and hair loss. After trying remedies a friend suggested Cuticura she saw rapid improvement using Cuticura Soap and Ointment and the baby recovered with hair growth and clear skin. Sample offered with 32 page Skin Book by Cuticura Dept L Boston.
A group of weary fishermen trudge home in rain with empty baskets and bad tempers. A large ferocious dog barks as they pass a village, one man kicking it aside. He mutters he would risk a bite just to reach home.
Rose Pastor Stokes speaking for a New York charity recounted a slum girl visiting a barnyard for the first time. The child observed the ricks cows plows and hens and exclaimed with wonder at the sight of chickens all running about.
A joke hinges on a detective reference as a jeweler notes a woman’s marriage length. He estimates about 15 years based on the wedding ring style seen, with his wife challenging how he knows the duration. The punchline cites ring width changes roughly every five years as a dating clue.
A woman asks about a giant building, while a man, familiar with the city, admits he does not know what it is, noting it was not there yesterday as they exit a subway. The scene unfolds in downtown Manhattan with a sense of new urban change.
Fry's Magazine recounts Lord Lyveden's remark about a Scots skip during a recent Swiss curling match. He hailed a teammate's precise shot with the cheer Lie down and dee, man, lie down and dee. Ye'll never lay a finer stone nor that if ye live to be a hundred.
A terse exchange hints Scriblets will quit as a press humorist. He reportedly said he would stop jokes about moth in law bald headed men wom bats intoxicated husbands and crazy fights.
A reflective saying notes that revenge leaves a void as the avenger seeks a little more than payback. It underscores the endless appetite for retribution and its futility.
A terse confrontation features one man asking for guidance after an attack, and another suggesting naming the aggressor a liar. The exchange highlights strain in a personal quarrel, with emphasis on truth and response.
A playful line shows Chimmie Hey and Maggie delaying as a poor relation arrives. The speaker jokes that many would trade a million dollar husband for long alimony, noting that fortune hunters are not always skilled.
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