Obscure 19th Century Quips From Patter and Parody
A compact collection of transitional-era quips and satirical remarks from various editors and speakers. It includes a Yankee financial aside about money proximity, an Iowa editor accusing a patron of thieving, a lecturer admonishing a cougher with a Dr Bull’s Syrup offer, and a mock proverb on daughters and mothers.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Iowa
Leaning tower joke in grease reminded Italy
A young lady who loved geography noted a candle burning at an angle and compared it to the leaning tower of Pisa. A passerby retorted that the candle’s tower is in grease, whereas the tower being recalled is in Italy.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Pisa
Italy
Testimony to Bull's S Curative Syrup by Baltimore clergyman
J Q A Happaway of the Episcopal Methodist Church in Baltimore testifies to the good effects of Dr Bull's Cough Syrup in his family. He has used it in many cases with satisfactory results. Price is 25 cents per bottle.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
George Burn
Peapon
St. Baptist Church
Providence
R. 1
Dr. Bull
J.Q. A. Happaway, Esq
Episcopal Methodist
Baltimore
Niaka Gebiine
H. Goullon
Grand Duke of
Saxony
Sinighit
Holy Cross
Robert Christison
F.M.S
McBean
British Medical Journal
Baron von Humboldt
Liebig Laboratory & Chemical Works
New York
Paris
London
Proposal to fine paupers who drift into towns
A Missouri paper reports a proposed Legislature bill punishment by fine for paupers who inflict themselves on towns where they do not belong. It also suggests funding legislators' salaries from the revenue raised by such fines.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Missouri
Awful Adventure on Old Colony Ship Ends With Tassel
Two ladies on an Old Colony boat mistook a tassel behind their stateroom window curtain for a rat. A gentleman friend grabbed a slipper and struck, but the intruder was merely the tassel, hidden by the curtain as silence followed.
Dr. Pierce's Compound Extract of Smart-Weed Adverts Medicine
A historic ad touts smart-weed as a potent remedy for bowel complaints cold fevers and inflammatory pains. It mixes with Jamada Ginger and other extracts and urges every family to keep a supply priced at 50 cents by druggists.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Pierce
Why flowers bloom and acts of kindness compared
The earth bears flowers not for needs but beauty and brightness. Acts of kindness and courtesy in human interactions bring peace and joy to careworn souls. A gentle tone, a kind look, and generous hospitality uplift hearts and soothe distress.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Geo. C. Baldwin
Hood's Sarsaparilla Said To Cure Stomach Humor
The article claims humor in the stomach causes ailments like dyspepsia and chronic diarrhea and reports several cases cured by Hood's Sarsaparilla. It asserts the medicine offers remarkable cures and earns public confidence after use.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Hood
Little Traveller Finds Kindness On a Long Train Ride
In a Pullman from Boston to Stockbridge a lonely little girl named Nellie shares a car with a narrator. The narrator befriends her after she reveals her mother is dead and she has no living guardian. The conductor and passengers help care for Nellie until her aunt arrives in Boston to take her home, blessing the journey with quiet compassion.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Boston
Nellie
Stockbridge
Martha
Robin
Miscellany Reflections on Time and Kindness
A compact set of aphorisms on moral conduct, time management, simple work, and the impact of small acts. The piece contrasts haste with prudent action, notes that some find only easy tasks, and imagines tiny kindnesses brightening the world.
Enthusiam Called Selfless Inspiration for Man
A quotation asserts that pure enthusiasm is self-forgetful and noble and stands as the sole inspiration vouchsafed to humanity. The remark emphasizes high moral drive as the enduring spark guiding people forward.
Notable Words on Life Like Seasonal Attainment
A reflective passage compares men's lives to changing seasons, urging beauty in the evening, springtime promises, and autumn harvests of good deeds. The prose emphasizes growth, virtue, and the value of accumulated labor.
Be Brave Always in Adversity and Courage
The passage urges steadfast bravery as humanity’s duty during misfortune. It compares sorrow to metal refined by fire, claiming true courage strengthens oneself and helps others. It lauds the bravest hearts who press to the front in trouble.
God in Creation and Sustenance, a Sermon Note
A sermon fragment attributed to Rev. Dr. Cummings extols God as creator and preserver of the world. It speaks of the firmament, the verdant fields, blooming flowers, zephyrs, brooks, tempests, and Niagara, affirming that God moves and sustains life by his power.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
God
Niagara
Dr. Cummings
Sabbath law and wise rest for body and soul
A sermon extols the Sabbath as a divinely fixed rest of four and twenty hours weekly, argues against reducing rest like infidel regimes, and urges learning from nature’s signs as parables of spiritual truths, citing Rev. Th. L. Custer and Rev. E. A. Gilet to illustrate symbols from sun to harvest.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
France
Th. L. Custer
Public Confidence in Dr Kennedy Favorite Remedy
A Daily Times editor endorses Dr David Kennedy of Rondout New York and his Favorite Remedy. The piece asserts the medicine’s effectiveness for blood kidney and bowel diseases and proclaims the editor would not be without it for five times its cost.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
David Kennedy
Rondout
N. Y
Daily Times
Hoon
Hoop
Lightning and Fear in Home Thunderstorms
A nineteenth century correspondent recalls the terror of lightning, its neurological impact, and the social behaviors it provokes. He cites cases from Bowdoin College to Morrisania, urges informed safety, and explains proper lightning conductors and rods. The piece contrasts superstition with science and recommends indoor shelter and properly installed rods to reduce fatalities.
Old farmer foiled by kiss prank at depot
A dark depot scene ends with a young woman kissing the veteran farmer on the cheek and escaping with her friends. The surprised old man, believing a wife would be a mistake, laughs off the incident as his daughter and kin return home, while he endures a bruised coat and a sore eye.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mother
Jennie
John
Ark
Henry
Jane
Susan
Horace
Belinda
Calyn
Joshua
Peter
Copenhusen
Lang Kate
Amazing Texas farmer ants build underground cities
The Philadelphia Inquirer reprints Dr Hale's account of Texas farmer ants described by Rev McCook. Ants form underground cities with two surface gates, farms, roads two inches wide, granaries for seeds, and a queen attended by workers. Four kings per family. drones roam for sweets. they defend, clean, and share duties. schools uncertain.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
P. B
Texas
H.C. McCook
Tl’s
Cir
Hale
Chicago
Epteer
Theatre Mama Mistaken for Roman Policeman Fan
A Yorkshire mother in the theatre mistakes her son’s Roman costume for splendor and is praised as godlike. She then jokes she wished he looked like a policeman instead, highlighting a humorous clash of culture and spectacle.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Virginius
Yorkshire
Topical Reparation Promoted for Inflammation Relief
Parke R Borden of Bristol promotes Topical Reparation as an alkali absorbent for rheumatism neuralgia nerve disorders and inflammation. The product is priced at 50 cents and claims remarkable efficacy for inflammation unseen before.
Morist Tale of a Cleveland Mother's Lost Son
Rev. George Thomas Dowling cites a Cleveland mother who hid the breach between duty and desire. She raised a child from a dead daughter’s breast, fed him, clothed him, and guided him to Sunday school, yet failed to see his need for play and companionship. The boy chose other amusements, and the mother, aged and sorrowful, faced the wreck of her faith and family.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
George Thomas Dowling
Cleveland
Sory
Footprints of Progress and Moral Change in a New World
A speaker notes immense material progress from telegraph to electric light and inventions defining a new era. He asks whether the moral world will stay unchanged as society shifts with abolition, republican America, open China and Japan, world fairs, and women's freedom movements, urging reflection on the direction and end of this march.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
California
America
China
Japan
Bond Endorsements In Public Offices Come Under Scrutiny
The article notes rising defalcations and disappearances in recent years and critiques bondsmen who refuse or evade their responsibility when asked to cover amounts on town treasurers and other offices. It argues legal enforcement of endorsements could deter former lax attitudes and reduce the risk to public trust.
Man’s conundrum joke ends in ruin at tea party
A man at his home tea party tried a conundrum about why women cling. He meant to trigger the familiar ivy joke but rewrote it as Why is it like a woman. None of the ladies answered, so he declared the punchline himself: because the closer it clings the more youre ruined.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Bor
Bowdoin College
Washington
Springfield
Mass
Long Island
Malden
Scranton
N. P. Willis
Morrisania
Ivy
Weather Influences Coat Theft Claim Prompting Settlement Talk
A philosophical victim, referred to as Ir, claims the person who took his over coat was swayed by the weather. He asserts serenity now, but if the theft was for commercial reasons he is prepared to negotiate financial return.
Also Mentioned on This Page
Bristol Phenix
C. A. Greene
Phenix
Hope Street
AED OE
Flint & CO
Bolow
Flint & Cos Emporium
Providence, R. I
Georgee E. Namein
Taunton
Masa
Liebig Co’si Coca Beef Tonic
Professor Ten
Con Cama Beil
Vane Ll.d
Ellen
Sarah O. Jewell
E. A. Gilet
Tropics
New York Sun
Fesare
Messrs. C. I. Hoop & Co
Lowell
ASN
Moody, No
Broadway
Lowell, Mass
C. I. Hood & Co