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Newspaper
Barnesville Gazette
Location
Barnesville, Georgia, United States of America
Date
Oct 29, 1896
Page
6
Thoughtful facts discuss eye distance, beetles as deaf and blind, city family sizes, and diet limits. Notes on hogs, ocean salinity, and global botanical gardens compare numbers across nations. A medical aside promotes DeWitt's Little Early Risers for constipation and related ailments.
A rambling miscellany of quips from the Ram's Horn including a coroner’s jury verdict on fatal drinking, a French lawyer’s burial wish, a Indiana tomb inscription, a Michigan editor’s verse note, a politician’s quip on income tax, a uni union orator’s line on the British lion, and a Jorkin murder report with a banking twist.
A man asks a girl to announce to her mother which of her old suitors has come. The reply teases which man from a past involving crimes and misdeeds, recounting a hangman, forger, bunco steerer, faro bank runner and free lovers, asking which one is present.
George Crocker of San Francisco son of Charles Crocker, a deceased millionaire, will receive five hundred thousand dollars under a trust if he remains sober for five years before the fifteen year limit. His five year period began September 22, 1861, and ended September 22, 1896, at which time he demanded the money pending court order.
The advertisement claims De Witt's Witch Hazel Salve cures eczema and similar skin troubles, soothes instantly, restores tissues to their natural state, and never fails to cure piles.
Brother Gardner introduces Judge Skupanong Thompson amid wild rhetoric and comic dialect. The judge delivers a rambling political rant before leaving with multiple police-like exits, later being chased away after a string of kicks.
Annpolis and Mechanicsville residents report Chamberlain's Pain Balm relieves rheumatism and muscular pains. Jno G Brooks of Annapolis endorses the product and recommends it publicly. A J McGuy notes it helped a man with years of rheumatism, with Blackburn selling bottles at 50 cents.
Early morning near Cajon Pass the Santa Fe overland train bound east ran away with no one at the throttle. The engineer was badly hurt and the fireman rode a borrowed horse to chase the train, which stopped a mile and a half away after powering through a steep grade. The crew returned with an engine and the journey resumed.
The San Francisco audience prefers blood spilling tragedy to witty plays, valuing forceful, sensational drama over comedy. Even among cultured crowds, the majority favors intense, dramatic endings, with Edwin Forrest’s style resonating more here than in many cities. The paper notes a predominance of less educated tastes.
A brief dialogue feature from the Philadelphia Call shows two speakers debating tiredness and rest. One asks if the other tires of doing nothing and the response admits fatigue before suggesting taking a rest.
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