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Newspaper
Baraboo News
Location
Baraboo, Wisconsin, United States of America
Date
Dec 28, 1904
Page
9
In Springfield Illinois senators and a speaker debate looks and a child weighs in with humor. The tale recalls Thomas Brackett Reed and a New England fishing village anecdote about a countryman who learns the water is for sale as a fisherman mends nets.
A New York Times tale recounts a boy’s diary entries after receiving his first diary for his birthday. His mother edits his wording to a higher standard, correcting “Got up at 7” to thoughtful entries such as “Rose at 1” and “Set at 8” to avoid sins in English.
Missouri figure Champ Clark attends exercises at a kindergarten. He asks children about an elephant's skin and a pupil eagerly responds with I have. The youngster points to the elephant as the skin source.
A London Chronicle report notes Roman bath ruins at Silchester with architectural fragments including a small altar bases and a Purbeck marble basin. The filled hypocaust yielded over 100 bone hair pins and a pair of gold earrings with uncut green gems, suggesting luxury artifacts from the era.
The London News reports French engineers work on three plans to exploit the Dead Sea for industry. Connecting the sea by canal to the Mediterranean or Red seas could yield about 25 000 horsepower from the water flow. Evaporation is cited as preventing overflow, with 6 000 000 tons daily.
A city editor disputes a reporter on whether a streetcar jolt equals a jar in a tale about a nervous disease. The reporter insists no jar exists, only abrupt starts and stops, while the editor argues there is a difference. The joke hinges on a play of words about preserves and jolts.
The piece notes that Turkey employs Chirkasses like Russia uses Cos sacks. It describes their cruelty toward Christian Bulgarians, highlighted by MacGahan who exposed abuses that helped trigger the Russo Turkish War. It states Chirkasses remain active in Turkey's Asiatic provinces.
A remarkable veteran of seventy seven in England appears younger in his sixties. Lord Chelmsford entered the army sixty years ago and fought before Sevastopol. He served in the Indian Mutiny Abyssinian Kaffir and Zulu wars. After the Zulu, he was sent to the Tower of London as its lieutenant.
In a brief exchange Philip Hale the Boston music critic explains to a woman pursuing musical culture that the difference between the first and second violins in an orchestra costs about ten dollars per concert.
The Boston Transcript notes a newly coined Flemish word for automobile formed from snel rapid belo w Horseless zoond eespoor weg without rails and petrodrif tuig driven by petroleum. The joke questions how one would feel to be struck by such a name heavy vehicle.
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