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This newspaper page contains 32 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Ames Times
Location
Ames, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Dec 24, 1908
Page
7
Italian towns with over 6000 residents must build municipal slaughter houses where all butchers drive livestock to be killed. The city provides buildings cleanliness and vet services while butchers handle conveyance carcass removal and dressing. Milan’s complex slaughters sits on several acres with parallel stalls and elevated air corridors.
The article advises a lost person to move slowly and avoid panic. Move about two miles per hour through snow, monitor fatigue and sweating, and aim to regain the road by afternoon if possible. Check the last footprints and follow the direction of the last passing vehicle to find shelter nearby.
A. B. Carleton in Outing Magazine implies the morning traveler would diverge from the path, suggesting the person who laid tracks came from the shelter source used the prior night. The fragment notes a connection between tracks and shelter origin.
A walking encyclopaedia narrates thoughts at length while his taciturn partner grows increasingly disgusted. He proclaims himself a great smoker and nervously needs to have something in his mouth, prompting a quip to try a gag. New York Times.
A Bohemian Magazine anecdote recalls an all night restaurant scene at 1 30 a m where a tough waiter pressures a customer to claim an order of corned beef and cabbage already served ten minutes earlier. The exchange ends with a grim stance on sticking to the order.
The London Mail notes elephants have strong memories and wild beasts such as tigers and lions in captivity recall friends and react to familiar visitors after months. It mentions F Martin Duncan and references the Jungle and zoological gardens as context for animal memory. Preventives candy cold cure tablets are claimed by druggists to have four advantages.
An advertisement touts remedies for colds that contain no quinine and no harsh taste. It promises quick relief and pleasant candy like flavor. A large box priced at 25 cents is marketed as 48 Preventives and is suggested for feverish children, sold by Joel B E Cagwin.
A reader reports a cheap method to waterproof matches by dipping ordinary parlor matches into melted paraffin cooled to a low temperature. The coated matches scratch off the paraffin and light as usual after drying. They resist water for hours and require extra rubbing to ignite, reducing accidental fire risk.
A banker from West End Avenue pursued an odd naming scheme over five years, naming his first three sons Tom Dick and Harry. The tale, recounted in an uptown club, contrasts with others who search for unique names.
Pat asks about a wife or companion's health and danger level. Mike says she is not dangerous, only civil and too weak to pose a danger. Newspaper tone reflects a casual exchange from a New York Sun item.
The phrase notes agriculture as the most healthful useful and noble occupation attributed to George Washington.
The passage highlights Thomas Nast and Joseph Keppler as masters of caricature. Nast used extended faceoffs at subjects' offices then revisited them from memory to perfect likenesses. Keppler frequented Washington to observe statesmen directly, rarely relying on photographs.
A carrier pigeon reunited with Mrs. Nansen at Christiania after thirty months away. The bird delivered Nansen's polar expedition update, having flown through blizzards and vast distances to reach its destination.
A society note recounts an afternoon card party incident. A stout guest asks help picking up a fallen card claiming a new fifty dollar corset would strain if she leaned. The other guest remarks she would wear such a corset on the outside.
A court remarks on an insanity plea as the foreman jokes that one lacking sense to recognize such a plea is indeed crazy. The exchange highlights a legal moment where sanity and criminal responsibility are debated in a colorful quip.
Hobbs reveals he will ignore Miss Gobbs after her remark last night. Blobbs exclaims at the surprising exchange reported by the Cleveland Leader.
A brief quotation notes the challenge of taking the greater from the less in math. It adds that a close approach exists when the conceit is stripped from a freshman, reflecting a light editorial stance on education and math pedagogy.
Archie is described as going crazy over his new motor and repeatedly reacting to it in different scenes. The dialogue suggests strong, humorous emphasis on his obsession with the vehicle.
Lord Lyveden shares peerage reform tales including a famed nineteenth century statesman visiting his jailed son who retorts you will be the greatest blackguard in the peerage when you die. Another tale involves a peer seeking a housekeeper, and Anne Brown replies she declines to enter his house. Westminster Gazette.
During a tour in this country the late Sir Henry Irving staged Twelfth Night in New York. His absentminded remark delighted his company and the audience as Malvolio reacted to Sir Toby’s remark with surprise.
An actor improvises a line and erupts in laughter as stage associates react. He repeats the line with emphasis and learns he unintentionally parodied the well known words of The Private Secretary. He says the joke came from forgetfulness while thinking of another play.
Sir Walter Scott recounts a strange event at Floors Castle home of the Duke of Roxburghe. Archie's library bell rings as he dies after the Duke’s funeral, with the footman answering instantly in a final pledge.
The article says breaking a bottle over a ship’s bow is not a festive rite nor a baptism symbol but a sign of sacrifice. It notes ancient launchings required devoting a life to appease the gods, while modern civilization no longer offers a life, so a bottle represents that sacrifice.
The article recalls Jerome K. Jerome choosing a soldier role over a pantomime donkey, thinking the red coat suited him. A manager later told him the donkey would have suited him better and offered 5 shillings more per week.
A user rubs a coin on a smooth upright surface then presses hard. The air between the coin and wood is driven out, and atmospheric pressure holds the coin in place.
A tramp pleads for help with no relatives to rely on as a housekeeper dismissively assigns him to a tiger named task or threat, illustrating tense social dynamics. The exchange hints at precarious survival and strained mercy within a domestic setting.
A humorous exchange from London Answers features Mrs Talkmore noting a giraffe’s eighteen inch tongue and Mr Talkmore retorting about its restraint after a long curtain lecture the night before.
Aichison Globe quotes a reflection on social unease, urging restraint in reading others minds. The remark emphasizes sensitivity in judging how people feel about us and the discomfort of assumed judgments.
A London Sketch discusses the English hotel waiter as a vanishing race. The piece notes his monumental manner and unblemished service, suggesting only a duke's butler level of polish remains as the profession faces decline.
The New Zealand Herald observes a notable shortage of women in Auckland and across New Zealand with far more men than women, leaving many men without wives.
A humorous exchange from Tit-Bits where a boy asks about becoming prime minister and a youngster offers to sell his chance for a shilling, reflecting playful colonial era wit.
Local ad promotes 90 large cups of Dr Shoop's Health Coffee from a 25c pack, plus a 25c silvered No-Drip coffee strainer coupon. Coupon included, sold by J J Grove.
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