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This newspaper page contains 11 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Alliance Herald
Location
Alliance, Nebraska, United States of America
Date
Dec 25, 1903
Page
7
An assortment of dubious health claims markets Dr Kime's Great Nerve Kenton for nervousness and baby beauty with a fixed price and promise of repeated purchases. The text criticizes wasteful spending and warns against men who squander money.
The article notes State Farmer's Mutual Insurance Co of S Omaha Neb organized 1896 with 20 000 000 in force and issuing a perpetual policy. It calls for agents and cites annual meeting set for January 1904 with R Stouffer secretary and Soler president. It adds a nautical quip about a vessel's port side not being the captain's wine cellar.
A visitor in New York heard a preacher deliver the same text at three churches in one day. After the fires and a passing remark from the itinerant clergyman, the visitor quips that Simon’s mother in law must be dead since he preached the same line thrice.
A New York Times quote recounts David Belasco's shrewd theater insight. He recalls how managers pretend to read manuscripts to appease hopeful playwrights. He describes his own failed pitch and the manager's reaction, highlighting the harsh realities young writers face.
In a nameless town two young partners whiled away an afternoon playing cards. A hurried customer enters and asks which one will shave him. Tom delays, claiming to wait to see who owns the shop before proceeding.
Col Horace Duval visits a railway friend at Grand Central and jokes over a cake topped with meringued cloud. The eldest daughter, amused, compares the scene to a star express train, calling it the Sunset Limited for its speed.
A drunken mishap in a German village led to cows grazing and reeling in the fields after alcohol was mixed into their fodder. Authorities milking the herd found the animals misbehaving, their faces bearing a merry, morning-toxicated expression. The tale echoes a joke about priests and fishmen and a stray question about a dash of whisky.
A cryptic OCR fragment references a poem line about holiness and love, hints at imagery of a telescope and harmony, and mentions Ernest Neal Lyon in Everybody's Magazine. The readable bits suggest literary verse rather than a news item.
The advertisement urges keeping Peruna in every house with children to ward off winter catarrh and other illnesses. It cites testimonials from Mrs. Schafer of St. Louis and Mr. Lietzman of Chicago praising Peruna as a preventive and cure, noting improvements in a daughter, a baby, and the narrator's own health.
A period advertisement extols Peruna as a cure for colds leading to croup bronchitis and rheumatism in children. It cites a Mrs. Brown of Dunne-lan Springs and asserts one bottle cures a lingering cough and restores health, urging parents to treat colds early and seek Dr Hartman’s guidance from the Hartman Sanitarium in Columbus Ohio.
A collage of ad copy and proverbs from an early 20th century page urges readers to ask their druggist for the Peruna Almanac for 1904. It blends product pitches with cautionary maxims about apology, aging, honesty, and social behavior, interspersed with brand names and household goods.
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