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Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
May 16, 1912
Page
2
A collage of satirical items from ADVANCE INDIANA and other sources. Notes mock economics baby value taxes on bachelors and a hair graft joke. Witty quips include Mars year length a philadelphia official on married labels and Egyptians and appendicitis.
In Portland Oregon during a trial one attorney threw an ink well at a colleague fueling a tense courtroom moment. The clash underscored hostile exchanges amid legal proceedings and drew attention to courtroom decorum and conduct.
A survey of early 20th century social stray items notes California women have equal footing with men in divorce and voting where applicable, while jokes about big feet and brains, jail for a Camden girl for kicking a policeman, and other social quirks of the era pepper the column.
E R Stroeter outlines summer flock management from pasture rotation to shade, water, parasite control, and feeding. He recommends bluegrass with white clover, frequent pasture changes, and salt mixes, plus methods for worm control and wool handling. He covers castration, docking, lamb feeding, creep feeding, and fattening older sheep using corn field rotation and rape.
A reader suggests a tree themed contest with many puns and matching items for a sixteenth birthday party. The note lists tree based answers for games and snacks and asks for ideas to illustrate Sweet Sixteen with box favors and bon-bons.
A reading lists ice cream and brrvbany cake followed by cocoa with cream and nut bread sandwiches for those seeking more. The playful line hints at a light, dessert centered offering with variety.
A reader asks how to mend a rift after losing a scarf-pin given to a gentleman friend. The suggested remedy is to describe the pin to a jeweler and attempt to duplicate it, then send the replacement to the man. If he refuses the offer, the effort and intent to make amends are stated as sufficient.
The agriculture department expands boys corn clubs from the south into New England with W. J. Spillman in charge. Each boy gets a measured acre and guidance on growing the crop. Early results show yields from 8 cents to produce up to 228 bushels per acre, signaling potential value in the program started by Dr. S. A. Knapp.
Daily red vaseline with a camel hair brush darkens and grows lashes and brows. Eat nuts in winter for nutrition. Elevate chest while walking and breathe through the nose. If nails britt le, oil or vaseline tops before cutting. White soaps are purer than colored scented ones. Diluted glycerine is safer for skin. Borax starch iris and borax powder helps perspiring hands. An egg lemon pomade creates a safe facial whitening paste.
A new nightdress case design shown in a sketch uses art linen silk or muslin with a soft silk lining. It is cut as one piece with a dotted line enclosure and folded flaps that button to the back. The word Nightdress and a floral fill decorate the front with a ribbon loop for hanging if desired, and it can be easily washed.
Farmers should cart manure away promptly after harvest to improve soil and reduce barn odors in hot weather. Applying manure to stubble fields soon after harvest is recommended while a good spreading site is available.
Disease germs thrive in dark damp places so clean well lighted and dry surroundings prevent disease spread and aid recovery once illness occurs. Cleanliness supports public health and helps patients regain strength.
A 1910s note describes recommended colorings for concrete per barrel of cement with dry sand. It lists iron oxides and pigments for brown, black, blue, green, gray, red, bright red, purple, violet, and yellow, and warns against drying bleaching and fading.
The 17 year locust is said to be due in the middle west this year. Some believe the insect carries letters on its back that foretell peace with a P or trouble with a W in distant nations.
Rhubarb dug last fall and allowed to freeze may be stored in a box covered with soil and watered, then kept in a warm dark place. Edible shoots will soon grow from the roots, and growing in darkness keeps the leaves small.
Advice notes corn overload harms pig litters and sows. When a sow is restless during nursing, check piglets for sharp teeth and remove any found. The guidance emphasizes quick action to protect herd health and reduce losses.
The article advises choosing flower colors that best suit artificial lighting. Blues and violets look dull under artificial glow, while blues tones intensify with such lighting. White red and yellow flowers stay vibrant under both daylight and artificial light.
Bills handkerchiefs are favored by many men due to softness and suppleness. They require little space and are a material comfort and attractive anniversary gift.
Charming letters can be made for silk handkerchiefs using pure silk net. Decorating with a wreath of flowers and filling the space with French knots or latticework adds value to the gift.
Lace on tailored gowns and costumes frames spring fashion. Skirts open at the side front to reveal lace panels while ivory-toned lace drapes coats like fichus, offering refined decorative touches.
A tip urges users to extend rubber longevity by applying adhesive plaster across a break in the narrow back strip. The plaster, available in narrow strips, bonds permanently to the rubber and helps preserve the item by resisting tearing. The remedy aims to save rubber cilia and prolong wear.
A sermon outlines Jesus fulfillment of the Mosaic law transforming outward rules into inward heart motives. It warns against mere form, stresses righteous living, and links teaching and practice. It urges reconciliation with neighbors, quick settlement of claims, and forgiveness as essential to acceptable worship.
A country schoolboy and his devoted teacher share a playful moment. The student asks about age and quips he is old enough to enjoy a kiss, prompting a gentle, humorous exchange in Mack's National Monthly.
Mrs. Carrie Sommer of Chicago reports severe kidney pain from a cold, back and limb agony, heart trouble, and dizziness. After failing with a doctor, she used Doan's Kidney Pills and was entirely cured, with eight years of relief.
A village resident asks Patsy to bring a paper in the morning and she volunteers to collect it tonight, noting the need for timely delivery. The text then shifts to an advertisement praising Garfield Tea for gentle, effective sleep aid.
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