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This newspaper page contains 29 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Advance Hustler
Location
Advance, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Jan 23, 1913
Page
3
Fire broke out in the southeastern part of the Bank of England building and damaged flooring and joists. Bank authorities spotted the outbreak and extinguished it with their appliances in about 30 minutes. A lieutenant and a dozen Irish Guards with fixed bayonets assisted police in keeping the crowd back.
A skeptical friend asks how his speech impressed. Senator Sorghum says he prefers hearing himself speak to receiving cheers from his constituents, claiming he is among the orators his audience would rather listen to than applaud.
A humorous fragment contrasts a man of dark deeds with a job in coal. Mrs. Austin’s pancakes are praised as a wholesome breakfast, followed by a brief advertisement note.
A traveling man recalls waiting nine hours at a lonely station 750 miles from home, contrasting the child’s careless prattle with the rattle of a train. The fond father frames the scene by asking what is more delightful than a child's prattle.
An advertisement claims constipation causes serious diseases and that Pierce's Pleasant Pellets cure it. It promotes the pill as laxative and cathartic and hints at night life disruption for young men kept awake by larks.
An aged health ad claims tired blood causes paralysis apoplexy and poor circulation. It argues arteries need constant perfect blood flow and elimination of waste, presenting Tonstives as a health aid for a peaceful old age sold for 75 cents a box by dealers or mail from The Tonstives Co Buffalo NY.
Real estate ads offer farms in Franklin Kansas Giles Tennessee Macon Illinois Green ville Michigan Franklin Missouri Grand Haven Ottawa Indiana Prairie Arkansas Iowa Kosciusko Wisconsin Minnesota Idaho Barnes North Dakota White Mississippi. Listings include acreages from 50 to 640 with cultivated land barns orchards stock machinery and multiple dwellings.
A dated advertisement promotes Globe Pine Compound as the best cold cure. It instructs druggists to supply two ounces glycerine and half an ounce Globe Pine Compound to mix with a half pint of wine, with dosages after meals and at night for adults and children. The Globe Pharmaceutical Laboratories of Chicago publish the claim.
A humorous exchange about a family meal where the father allegedly caused embarrassment by leaving multiple utensils unused, suggesting a chaotic or improper dining sequence. The dialogue highlights social awkwardness and kitchen table comedy.
Prof Herbert Satterley in Jacksonville mocks anti vivisectionists by exposing their paradox. He recalls a diner who claimed to be an anti vivisectionist and vegetarian, then reveals the man ate a live caterpillar with his lettuce salad.
Simeon Ford described a fictional malady called shopper's cramp at a dinner of hotel men in New York. He claimed it appears in December and becomes epidemic mid month, ending on December 24. He joked that women feel it in all limbs while husbands feel it only in the pocket.
A Toledo mayor discusses discontent as a driving force behind national progress. He cites the idea of contentment as secondary to striving, illustrating with a farmer who longs to own surrounding land and questioning the storm story’s lengthy description.
An unusual dialogue piece references a candlemaker mixing extremes with puns about cereous light and mint. The exchange touches on money, work, and marriage as a stepping stone, with fragmented lines about her brother and a solitaire.
A reader letter from Dak describes stomach trouble relieved by Grape-Nuts. The writer credits improved digestion and stronger nerves after using the cereal, noting it as the best breakfast choice and urging others with stomach issues to try it. The ad cites Postum Co. Battle Creek Michigan and the booklet The Road to Wellville.
Lesson on Genesis four contrasts Abel and Cain through offerings and faith. It covers sin and blood sacrifice, Cain’s jealousy, God’s mercy, and the mark of Cain as protection. The lesson links hatred to murder and stresses accountability to God for nurture, justice, and societal oppression.
An Iowa notice lists J Mulhall of Moex Chy, Clover seeds and alfalfa seed sale tied to crop payments. The brief includes advisory quotes and pancake ad remarks, reflecting generic business and lifestyle notices from the era.
Bella recalls a perilous Escanaba freight boat trip with Mrs Clark and Fay. A sudden storm and loss of lifeboats test nerves as insects powder and improvised life preservers create comic distress before rescue by the captain. The piece ends with a witty exchange about a fiancé’s habits.
A light remark about compiling a pedicure manual and noting plenty of foot notes. The exchange uses playful wordplay on feet and writing tasks.
A young wife complains to a friend that her husband lacks initiative. She says she must suggest requesting a raise, then he hesitates long before acting. Their exchange highlights perceived indecisiveness in negotiating pay.
A widow mother, with six children, works hard but lacks money while her daughter Dot asks for many things. Dot remains hopeful, asking if the ship has come in after the mother briefly gives her a nickel, marking an unusual moment of possible relief.
Representative Pujo discusses currency stability in Washington and urges automatic delicate balance. A humorous exchange follows with a wife remarks about heavy parcels and a lighter pocket after John boasts of his burden.
Mayor Gaynor argues city government should apply the same reform law to all citizens. He condemns double standards from reformers and says intoxication is equally harmful whether in upscale Fifth Avenue or common Third Avenue.
A Scot coast native at a shipyard party jokes about wiring the electric light system on the first three steamers. He quips that after working with the electricians he could install the lights but cannot figure out how the wires run the proper way.
A fragment from a dialogue shows the manager keeping back a portion of the villain's pay. The villain fears exposure humorously, while the manager acts more fiercely when angered, highlighting theatrics over finances.
A government bulletin on the egret claims the barnyard rooster furnishes many feathers misidentified as aigrettes. The report states enormous quantities of fancy feathers are used by American milliners, with many rooster tails passing as aigrettes.
A man in Cok remarks to Bill Payton that settling the estate is so troublesome he sometimes wishes his father had not died. The Kansas City Star notes the witty complaint as a local reflection on probate delays.
A barbed joke scene contrasts marriage bias with comic wit as a widow and a man discuss cures. A nursemaid touts Mrs. Syrup for teething pain and wind colic. A quip about a husband’s removal of his vermiform appendix follows, ending with a punchy comeback.
A Gray County probate judge from Cimarron Kansas claims Dodds Kidney Pills cured years of heart palpitations. He reports dizziness eyes puffiness and chills prior to use, and states symptoms disappeared after about a year of treatment. The letter also promotes Dodds Medicine Co products and free household hints music and recipes.
Maud’s marriage shocked many friends when she wed an electrical engineer. The quick ceremony surprised the social circle and drew curious reactions from locals.
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