03 Jun 1910
Page 1
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This newspaper page contains 39 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Wauwatosa News
Location
Wauwatosa, Wisconsin, United States of America
Date
Jun 03, 1910
Page
1
The verse claims facial hair marks national identity with lines about German, English, French, and Russian gentlemen. It notes the German count has a rowed mustache, the English lord wears lip hair like Ayres, the Frenchman dresses as a sport, and the Russian’s coarse mustache hangs easily.
The tale from Erie Pa recalls a boy Chester Saltsman who after attending church alone answers his mother with a pun on the sermon text Have no fear the comforter will be with you rather than the expected gospel. A second quip features Sally and Mrs Shipshape about finding the broom and keeping a place for everything in its place.
The Philadelphia Bulletin features a playful note on choosing topics with a whimsical tilt. The writer leans toward radish over daffodil, signaling a preference for sharper, more offbeat subject matter.
A humorous vignette from Judge's Library about a corpulent diner who finishes a meal, flicks away a lingering sense of guilt, pockets a door bill from beneath an ash tray, and exits past a disappointed waiter. The tale plays on memory and petty mischief in a lighthearted tone.
A four year old Sammie resists going to school citing the Netherlands endgame. In a drug store scene with a mother and her infant Algie, the child’s loud complaints drive the staff away as the mother redirects orders from chocolate dips to Algie’s needs.
While en route to an appointment in Ohio, Wendell Phillips in a railroad car encountered a crowd of clergy returning from a convention. One minister reacted to the scene as the discussion unfolded involving Phillips.
A man asks Sam Phillips if he aims to free enslaved people, revealing Phillips as an abolitionist. The exchange ends with the assailant fleeing into the smoker as the crowd laughs. The item includes a fragment from Everybody's Magazine and a London Sketch joke about school marks.
A humorous exchange about a red and white striped pole in a dorm corner. The senior quips it is a relic of barberism, reflecting campus humor and student wit published in the Yale Record.
A Cleveland Plain Dealer excerpt shows Billy Evans at home lamenting the umpiring season ahead as he contemplates the harsh duties of the calling. A phone interruption spurs a humorous misfire as he answers for his absent wife, startling the caller.
A playful exchange features Muggins arguing wine, women, and song belong together while countering that they should not. The Philadelphia Record records the banter over the grouping as a lighthearted quip on cultural tastes.
A political scene recalls Lloyd George famed for sharp wit. He began a quip with I am here but a noisy interrupter added and so am I. The reply came swiftly and with impact Yes but you are not all there as noted by the London Daily Mail.
A light quip from Tit-Bits notes a humorous tussle with a dentist, concluding that neither side gained the upper hand and the exchange ended in a draw.
A Philadelphia Ledger quote shows a craps player declaring a sure thing and Policeman 711 stepping around the corner to collar the player while asking how the officer knew the number. The exchange frames a comic street encounter and the tension between gambler and lawman.
In a Senate speech on Hawaiian affairs Senator Depew of New York shared a story from Queen Liliuokalani’s England visit during a jubilee. At Buckingham Palace Victoria asked how she had English blood and the queen replied that her ancestors are Captain Cook.
A Cleveland Leader quip captures a laborer joking with his employer about carrying the same hod of mortar all day. The worker jokes that the boss thinks he is working hard while he merely moves the same load up and down.
In spring the hobo's fancy turns to grub and how to obtain it without work. The riddle centers on the craving and the dilemma of finding food without labor, a satirical reflection on poverty and survival.
An inveterate wit asks the ship captain how he gets dinner aboard. The skipper says they always cook aboard. The wag replies that he sees provisions are ample, as the joke unfolds in a Tit-Bits style exchange about cooking on a voyage.
A short line from the Columbian Magazine shows a man asking how he was brought over and another replies he was picking up a horseshoe for luck. The exchange reflects a folk belief in luck and mischief.
A Washington Star quip notes the prima donna blames the press agent for her ire. He claimed she sang like an angel. she counters that angels she knew could only write checks. The exchange highlights theater vanity and cash clashes.
A man in a mellow condition enters a barber shop and settles in a chair. He asks for a haircut and jokingly tells the barber to have one too. The scene unfolds with light humor in Everybody's Magazine.
A fragment from the Houston Chronicle shows a stout German lady seeking washing at home and a child named six answering about her mother’s absence from exercise. The exchange mirrors the era’s brisk, sly humor within newspaper humor columns.
Advertisers are invited to use this paper to reach home readers and publicize wants and notices. The notice emphasizes promoting products, services, or personal needs to the local audience through the newspaper platform.
Poem urges George to take decisive action on many issues. It questions who will curb hostile rhetoric with Parliament and seek peace, liberty for Egypt, end threats, and secure Home Rule for Ireland. The speaker suggests George may rise to the tasks ahead.
Esther Drew clings to hope after the Atlantis disaster as Bray Chalmers returns alive. Her husband Stanton Drew remains her confidant and later, Bray’s reappearance sparks tension and a test of loyalties in a period-piece romance.
Esther resists a suitor as Stan threatens to forget vows. Stanton Drew interrupts from the door and orders the visitor out. Esther kisses her husband in grateful closure as the scene ends, narrated by Wilfrid L Randell in London Tatler.
Paris introduces sackcloth as the new dress material for women with taw or toast tones and a demure style. Hats, sunshades, and a refined violet mood accompany the look as silk wool sacking debuts in a Paris firm model and signals a drab contrast to bright seasonal colors.
The Supreme Court affirmed a federal judgment in California fining and imprisoning Gustav Holmgren for perjury in naturalization. Holmgren, indicted in 1905 in San Francisco, allegedly swore he knew Frank Werta for five years when records show four.
Sacramento city clerk found an 1855 Sacramento directory in the new city hall. Edwin Booth is listed as a tragedian living at Mrs Torrey's boarding house, a center of the Japanese quarter. Other notable names include Newton Booth Mark Hopkins Charles Crocker and C P Huntington.
A Yale academic department senior class petition favors clemency for Charles W. Morse. It will be sent to President Taft, a Yale corporation member, with signers including Taft’s son Robert. The effort cites Edwin Albert Morse, Charles W. Morse’s son and a popular senior, whose roommate Edward C C Roberts of Hartford is collecting signatures.
Nine rules issued by chief marshal Margaret Glover govern senior girls attire at Commencement. The rules demand extreme simplicity: long sleeved white shirtwaists, linen collar, ties provided, plain white skirt with no embellishment, skirt three inches from ground, gown two inches above skirt, no jewelry or hair bows, black shoes and stockings, and dainty, trim feet with no fancy hair accessories.
The article prescribes a hands on routine to reduce a double chin using finger and thumb placement at the neck base and under the chin. It recommends lubricating the skin, massaging the chin area with rotary thumb movements, and massaging the back of the neck to improve results, with more dramatic effects when the head is tilted back during the motion.
William K. Vanderbilt astonished the French by bending a public road near his Poissy training barns. He pressed to relocate the route after failing drivers prompted nervous horses. Using influence and spending 200,000 pounds, the road was redirected away from the farm.
London reports the House of Commons approved the 1909 10 income tax resolution as Somerset House plans a swift start. New rates on earned unearned income, a ten percent deterrent for arrears, and brutal enforcement via distress warrants and imprisonment loom. Officials expect delays redress, while returns and abatements for children under 16 complicate the process.
At Tokyo appeal court Judge Miyamoto considers the case of 26 year old farmer Gisei Haseda who murdered his parents in law and injured his wife in 1908. He has remained silent since April and doctors testified to insanity using a venomous snake blood test. The trial was postponed pending recovery from presumed mental illness.
A dying Chinaman leaves eleven sheep and three sons. He wills half to the eldest, a quarter to the second, and a sixth to the youngest. A wise man adds his own sheep to the herd and divides: half, a quarter, and a sixth, then takes back his sheep. The division follows the will, and the tale ends with a remark about hope and balance.
One year after suffering back pain and suspected tumor, Emma Imse of Milwaukee credits Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound with restoring her health and urges others to try it before operations. The note, part of countless letters to the Lynn, Massachusetts company, touts free advice from Ms. Pinkham and the cure of obstinate female ailments. Also advertised: real estate exchanges and irrigation bonds offered by Lundstrom & Co. and H G Noel.
The albatross is a large sea bird famed for its vast 10 to 12 foot wingspan and lifelong seafaring life. It is linked to gulls and petrels, feeds on cuttlefish and scraps, and can soar with minimal wing strokes, rarely landing while at sea most of its life.
In a fragmentary exchange, Mrs Davies notes Mr Lloyd did not require Evans fine prayer. Mr Lloyd replies he longs for another parish, hinting at a change in assignment. The scene centers on church figures and implied relocation.
A school teacher recounts suffering from coffee effects since childhood. After switching to Postum on a physician's suggestion, her mood, energy, and heart symptoms improved, enabling better classroom performance and daily life. She credits Postum with renewed vitality and urges reading Wellville.
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